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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I have always thought it so strange that whenever I see women BFing at church functions that they cover their shoulder with a blanket - that screams "HELLO - I'M NURSING!!!" So at a church softball game yesterday I was BFing my little guy (nursing tank with my t-shirt pulled up on one side but tucked in to his cheek so you couldn't see anything) I thought it was obvious I was feeding him though because he was turned completly toward me... so the pastor comes up and peeks his head in to look at my babe....then DH says, "Oh he's feeding." The poor man!!! He had NO IDEA that I was BFing (and his wife is BFs too - but with the blanket <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">) he felt horrible...I and DH both tried to reasure him that no harm was done...but I just felt bad for him!<br><br>
...<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> but there you go - I guess the blankets were never meant to discuise nursing - but to let people know you were!!! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/orngtongue.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Stick Out Tongue">
 

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Funny <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br>
A similar story - I was bf my babe in the sling when she was only a couple weeks old, and we were in sunday school. DD was completely hidden in the sling. A friend of mine came up and started to move the top of the sling over so she could see dd, and I warned her "she's eating!". My friend was mortified. She was like "i guess i learned my lesson!".
 

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Huh. Never bothered our priest in Hawaii. (Both mamas who had babies when I was there nursed them; neither with a blanket.)<br><br>
My experience is that nursing with your shirt pulled up makes people think the baby is asleep. Most folks don't want to mess with a sleeping baby, and IMO there's nothng to see or be affronted by. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> (I did once have a little old lady come up and peek under the blanket I was using to latch on my eldest when she was a newborn and tell me how wonderful it was to see a baby nursing.)
 

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My FIL began taking photos of me while I was sitting on the couch nursing. He had no clue I was nursing dd. And he make the BIGGEST production out of taking pictures. I was cracking up the whole time. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 

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At Christmas last year, I had my then two-week-old son on my lap, just sleeping. Because we were so new to the whole nursing thing, we actually nursed in another room (I practically had to take my shirt off at that point! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> ), so I was just holding him on the couch. My uncle came along with his video camera and was shooting video of us. He zoomed way in to see the baby, narrating all the time: "There's our newest little one, on his mama's lap...." All of a sudden, he claps his hand over the lens and says in a stage whisper, "Oh, God! I'm so sorry! Is he eating???" The whole family laughed about that! You really can't tell sometimes! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">
 

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I was nursing my 9 month old in the Ergo today when an elderly man took a peak "at the cute baby" Guess he saw more then he planned<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">
 

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I've seen these cute nursing covers that stay out so you can see the baby. I tried one on at the local store. Cute. But I developed a "system" with the last one, after latch on I shove my shirt down to baby's cheek and hold it with one hand. I usually wear an under tank or belly band. I'm concerned that the cover will only draw more attention to me when otherwise people would not even look. I'm quite large so being discreet is out of the question! We don't go many strange places where everyone around is a stranger. We stick to smaller places where I can just run to the van, or family functions where I could care less if someone is uncomfy <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/redface.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Embarrassment"> Those skinny blonde models look cute with that thing on, but I think I'd just look ridiculous! I remember seeing a lady in the mall with a black one (can't get more discreet than that) and I remember thinking she looked like a circus act and the expression on her face that said even all covered up she was as embarrased and uncomfy as she could be!
 

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That happens to me all the time, especially in the sling. I'm glad no one's been obviously embarassed by it!
 

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What does size have to do with being discreet? <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/headscratch.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="headscratch"> I'm 207lbs (size 18) and wear a 40H right now (down from a 38J), so I'm far from being a skinny minnie, but I certainly am not indiscreet. In fact, <a href="http://www.holdthatpic.com/photos/741/19295.jpg" target="_blank">this</a> is what I typically look like while I'm breastfeeding. (That's actually a picture of my middle daughter, so I weighed more than I do now.)
 

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Oh! I feel so sorry for him!
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Sagesgirl</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8167956"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">What does size have to do with being discreet? <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/headscratch.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="headscratch"> I'm 207lbs (size 18) and wear a 40H right now (down from a 38J), so I'm far from being a skinny minnie, but I certainly am not indiscreet. In fact, <a href="http://www.holdthatpic.com/photos/741/19295.jpg" target="_blank">this</a> is what I typically look like while I'm breastfeeding. (That's actually a picture of my middle daughter, so I weighed more than I do now.)</div>
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Wow, I would have no idea you were nursing your dd if you didn't say so!
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> The poor guy! I've had that same thing happen to me, only not a priest. Lots of people have no clue that I'm nursing.
 

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The opposite happened to my husband aka mr socially oblivious asperger man. He peeked behind our friend's blanket because he thought the baby was just sleeping. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/dizzy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Dizzy">: Now he knows that a blanket over the shoulder= nursing baby. He wasn't used to that convention before.
 

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when dd was still itty bitty (around 6 weeks old), i was christmas shopping and i was hungry so i stopped at the food court to grab something to eat. dd was hungry, too <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/loveeyes.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Loveeyes">:, so i was sitting there nursing her (no blanket, with shirt pulled up) when the very elderly man in the table next to me came over and started to coo over dd. he said "oh, i must see your baby" (in a very sweet way, it wasn't creepy at all) but being a novice nip'er, i was a bit nervous. i started to tell him that she was eating, and he said "yes, i know. i was an obstetrician for over 30 years and i've helped to deliver 1000's of babies, you are doing a wonderful job and breastmilk is the best thing for your daughter".<br><br>
helped to boost my confidence A TON!!<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/winner.jpg" style="border:0px solid;" title="BFSymbol">
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>kidspiration</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8169151"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">when dd was still itty bitty (around 6 weeks old), i was christmas shopping and i was hungry so i stopped at the food court to grab something to eat. dd was hungry, too <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/loveeyes.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Loveeyes">:, so i was sitting there nursing her (no blanket, with shirt pulled up) when the very elderly man in the table next to me came over and started to coo over dd. he said "oh, i must see your baby" (in a very sweet way, it wasn't creepy at all) but being a novice nip'er, i was a bit nervous. i started to tell him that she was eating, and he said "yes, i know. i was an obstetrician for over 30 years and i've helped to deliver 1000's of babies, you are doing a wonderful job and breastmilk is the best thing for your daughter".<br><br>
helped to boost my confidence A TON!!<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/winner.jpg" style="border:0px solid;" title="BFSymbol"></div>
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What a wonderful story! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/thumb.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="thumbs up"><br><br>
I wish I could be discreet NIP. These days, DD is such a squirmer and a shirt-puller that it's frustrating. Some days are better than others though!
 

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Funny I read this today. Yesterday, an older coworker and I were discussing bf. She bf her daughter 30 years ago and was relating to me her experience of being singled out as a bf mom in church by one man who "took offense." She had pulled out a blanket and proceeded to feed her hungry dd. The priest talked to her about it and suggested that she feed her baby in the bathroom (remember, this was 30 years ago.) She stuck to her guns and told him that if this one person took offense (who should've been paying attention to the mass instead of her bf a babe) and they couldn't offer proper accommodations (like a crying room), then she would return to church once her babe was weaned.<br><br>
Oddly enough, there was a crying room available to new moms the following year. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br><br>
Oh, and she didn't return until the following year when she had weaned her dd.<br><br>
So yeah, from what I've gotten from talking to people is that one should use a blanket to at least put out the "warning" that a mom is bf. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/rolleyes.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="rolleyes">
 

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Had a similar situation with DS2 when I was on my maternity leave. I went up to visit my office and show the baby off and sat down in the office kitchen to nurse him, all the coworkers were in and out saying hi as they went about their work. (dental offices are mostly women we only had 2 men out of 20 employees.) So one of the men comes in to talk to me. We have a long conversation and he winds it down by saying that he has to get back to work, that he knows I will probably want privacy soon to feed the baby and leans in to get a peek at the little guy (that he assumes is sleeping) He got an eyeful of the little guy who had been lunching the whole time we were talking!
 

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Discussion Starter · #18 ·
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<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>dentmom3</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8169999"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Had a similar situation with DS2 when I was on my maternity leave. I went up to visit my office and show the baby off and sat down in the office kitchen to nurse him, all the coworkers were in and out saying hi as they went about their work. (dental offices are mostly women we only had 2 men out of 20 employees.) So one of the men comes in to talk to me. We have a long conversation and he winds it down by saying that he has to get back to work, that he knows I will probably want privacy soon to feed the baby and leans in to get a peek at the little guy (that he assumes is sleeping) He got an eyeful of the little guy who had been lunching the whole time we were talking!</div>
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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">
 

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I don't know what the big deal is. Breasts are for feeding right? Do people need warning?!<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/loveeyes.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Loveeyes">:<br><br>
I decided to try niping at the grocery store and had my 3 week 6 pounder little one in the mei tai. She was going at it like a champ while I grabbed my food and NOT ONCE popped off. I get to the front and all the cashiers want to see her and i'm like what the heck - they can't see anything.....<br><br>
POP! and big grin for the strangers!<br><br>
That was a time when I probably shouldn't have pretended to be sure of myself!<br><br>
Peace,
 
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