[hakunangovi]

The "Arguments to persuade feminists..." thread has been a fascinating read, and something Frank said got me thinking. He stated that he is the only man who is a regular poster on this forum. He is right - there are only a couple more of us who post sporadicaly. Why is that ??

For me my job is a huge impediment - I am on the road a lot with no computer access, and then when I am home DW chews on me if she finds out I've been on line discussing the issue of circ - not that she's pro-circ - just does not think I should be involved. And, to be honest I surf when I can, but only post if I think I can contribute.

As has been pointed out RIC is a 'baby' issue, but it is also a 'man' issue for all those of us who have to live with the after- effects. Logic would lead one to think that a huge number of men would be involved in trying to stop this barbaric practice, but such is not the case.

This is not an issue that men seem to discuss. I guess most feel uncomfortable. The few times that I have had the opportunity - usually co-incident with the arrival of a new baby boy - I have found that in most cases men are very ambivalent over the issue. In fact I personaly know only one other man ( an intact BIL ) who is vehemently opposed to RIC.

So what's going on ? Besides a whole lot of denial ?

 

[boingo82]

A thought - both my DH and father are circ'd but anti-circ.
Neither likes to talk about it. Probably it's unpleasant enough that they'd rather not think about it any more than they have to.
I can talk about it more easily as I am not involved in it already.

 

[house elf]

My dh is glad we left our son intact but he doesn't like to talk about it very often (he is circ'd). Every once in awhile he will come out with a question, either about circ or about Matthew being intact, and we've had a few deep discussions, but I think it is a little painful for him to talk about.

 

[Super Pickle]

For my husband, it's about not wanting to dishonor his beloved parents. It's hard for him to admit that they made such a terrible mistake.

 

[TigerTail]

my dh is gonna sign up now

all these years i've tried and poor frank's lament has thawed his hard heart. good, we needed a jewish male intactivist pov here (wait, isn't dr jay-...?) lol, watch him get my isp banned like yammer & poor willow.

suse

 

[blueytheb]

Hello, all. I am just here to say hi, and introduce myself. My wife, suseyblue, invited me here to discuss the topic of circumcision, so I look forward to meaningful discourse with you all.

 

[LavenderMae]

My dh is anti-circ (he is circed) but he doesn't talk about it much. He did try to talk to one of his friends about it before the friends son was born, the friend didn't want to hear it (the baby was circed). He has talked to a couple of friends about it but I am the one who brings it up. My dh doesn't really have a huge issue with admitting his parents made a huge mistake but he isn't very close with them. I would gather denial has a lot to do with it. Good question, Howard!

 

[Quirky]

Like they say, denial, it's not just a river in Egypt....

Although I'm happy to report I've recently met IRL the man who founded NotJustSkin, and there are a number of men (don't know how many) in this group.

And I am also ECSTATIC to let you all know that my circed-and-in-denial dh, who is happy we left ds intact but has refused to budge off "it's ok to circ to look like daddy," has agreed to help me try to persuade his brother and (pregnant) SIL not to cut their baby boy. I don't know if we'll succeed, but quite frankly I think there's a much better chance if the message goes from dh to his brother as opposed to coming from me, the official hippy dippy crunchy munchy extended-breastfeeding cloth-diapering ECing vegetarian whackjob of the family to the private-school attending, upper crust East Coast, pearl-and-twin set wearing SIL.

So I guess there's hope - I may not make an intactivist out of dh but he's coming around.

 

[Frankly Speaking]

Welcome to the board Blueytheb! I've been the only man here on a regular basis for years. I can use all of the help I can get to dilute all of the estrogen floating around here! :LOL

Frank

 

[Nathan1097]

Hey- you WANT the estrogen! That's what makes us - ahem! "Want it"! Its the progesterone that makes us agressive. ROFL Besides, we have testosterone too- and you have trace amounts of estrogen.

I'm just feelin' GREAT cuz I have this horrible cold so don't mind me....

 

[townmouse]

My thoughts about my family....

My dh will go to his grave with unresolved feelings about circumcision. He did a brave and noble, and right thing in 'allowing' his 4 sons to remain intact. That is his stand, and it required the difficult decision to face his culture, his family, his past, and his own penis. But he's not going to keep talking about it.

Our sons will talk about it. They'll know that half the other men in the nation, are not circed either, and they'll have something to say. They won't have any baggage to impede them, or make them shy or defensive. They'll be who they are, and want to fight to protect baby boys, the way they were protected.

They'll thank their daddy for being able to get past himself, to protect them. They may even tell their kids about Grandpa, who was the first in the family to break the chain of mutilation.

But I' pretty sure that dh has already done all he's personally going to do, in the fight against circumcision. He saved 4 boys, and their sons and maybe grandsons. Its enough.

 

[A&A]

www.noharmm.org

was started and is maintained by a man.

My dh is an intactivist, but doesn't post here. (Perhaps because this place is called "MOTHERing.")

 

[Frankly Speaking]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nathan1097 Hey- you WANT the estrogen! That's what makes us - ahem! "Want it"! Its the progesterone that makes us agressive. ROFL Besides, we have testosterone too- and you have trace amounts of estrogen. I'm just feelin' GREAT cuz I have this horrible cold so don't mind me....

Just what are you taking for that cold that makes you feel so great? Can I get some? I don't have a cold but . . . Oh, forget it.

Actually, it's testosterone that makes women "want it." One female researcher rubbed some testosterone creme on her upper lip each day and said after about 10 days started thinking about "it" almost constantly and became very aggressive, "it" wise. Sounds like a man, Huh?

I thought about that for weeks. I won't say more. :LOL

Frank

 

[TigerTail]

amy, it's good he saved his own kids, but i'm glad that even in the midst of all his anger & sadness my dh can still talk about it at work... there are wives of coworkers that have supportive husbands now about bfing, that initially were filled with misconceptions, & if he can dispel some of the circ. myths to the expecting parents that is a marvelous thing too. shine that light, don't hide it under a bushel basket, you know?

suse

 

[WithHannahsHeart]

Oh, this is marvelous; i think it's great when men can talk honestly about such a sensitive topic.

My dh is not circ'ed, and is vehemently anti-circ; he thinks it is repellant and cruel, not to mention silly and unecessary. He comes from the former USSR, where maybe one in a million men are circ'ed, if that. I think it's great he wants his boys to look like their daddy!

Also i have tremendous credibility with other mothers when discussing the issue, as i can with total honesty tell them that my dh is very clean, and has never had a single issue with infection whatsoever. Not only that, i am perfectly convinced that that 'useless' piece of skin contributes to his remarkable, um, performance in bed

.

 

[townmouse]

suseyblue, I agree, I wish dh could/would educate others.

I'm pretty loud about it, myself, to people I meet, but I've often guessed that it might be more credible coming from a man

.

 

[G-ZA]

I'm a long-time lurker, occasional poster. Can only look in every few days though - work has become too busy.

I think one goes through phases too - I was off some of the boards for quite a while after the dad2be3 episode on another forum (Frank and others know it). Just got sick of banging my head on the desk.

 

[boingo82]

Quote:

Originally Posted by G-ZA I'm a long-time lurker, occasional poster. Can only look in every few days though - work has become too busy. I think one goes through phases too - I was off some of the boards for quite a while after the dad2be3 episode on another forum (Frank and others know it). Just got sick of banging my head on the desk.

BC or PP? I'm from BC.
edit: Nevermind. I know who you are now!!

 

[Nathan1097]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Frankly Speaking Just what are you taking for that cold that makes you feel so great? Can I get some? I don't have a cold but . . . Oh, forget it. Actually, it's testosterone that makes women "want it." One female researcher rubbed some testosterone creme on her upper lip each day and said after about 10 days started thinking about "it" almost constantly and became very aggressive, "it" wise. Sounds like a man, Huh? I thought about that for weeks. I won't say more. :LOL Frank

Okay, so I admit you're right... I dunno what that says about me though- I still sing soprano even so! :LOL

 

[G-ZA]

Quote:

Originally Posted by boingo82 BC or PP? I'm from BC. edit: Nevermind. I know who you are now!!

Yep! It's Aardvark Dad from BC...