[momtoNatalee]

Not sure if this is the right forum for this question, please move if needed.

I was trying to find some information on why our western culture has such different views on raising babies/children. I tried googling "infant western culture" and some similar things, but I really couldn't find the answers. Specifically things like CIO, fear of spoiling etc... Where did this all start and why? Why do Americans force independence? Because of selfishness? Anyway, just looking for some history on it.

 

[rzberrymom]

Quote:

Originally Posted by momtoNatalee Not sure if this is the right forum for this question, please move if needed. I was trying to find some information on why our western culture has such different views on raising babies/children. I tried googling "infant western culture" and some similar things, but I really couldn't find the answers. Specifically things like CIO, fear of spoiling etc... Where did this all start and why? Why do Americans force independence? Because of selfishness? Anyway, just looking for some history on it.

A good book on this subject is Raising America by Ann Hulbert

 

[lrlittle]

Also, 'Our Babies Ourselves' is AWESOME. Gives a lot of perspective on cosleeping, babywearing, and the western parenting culture in general.

 

[ellacy]

Quote:

Originally Posted by lrlittle Also, 'Our Babies Ourselves' is AWESOME. Gives a lot of perspective on cosleeping, babywearing, and the western parenting culture in general.

yep, that! A very enlightening read.

 

[momtoNatalee]

Thanks, sounds like what I'm looking for

 

[girl138]

Quote:

Originally Posted by momtoNatalee Not sure if this is the right forum for this question, please move if needed. I was trying to find some information on why our western culture has such different views on raising babies/children. I tried googling "infant western culture" and some similar things, but I really couldn't find the answers. Specifically things like CIO, fear of spoiling etc... Where did this all start and why? Why do Americans force independence? Because of selfishness? Anyway, just looking for some history on it.

christianity

:

 

[momtoNatalee]

Quote:

Originally Posted by girl138 christianity :

Just curious, why? Not saying you are wrong. Just wonder what in particular makes you say that?

 

[North_Of_60]

Quote:

Originally Posted by girl138 christianity :

Please elaborate, I'm curious. Honestly.

 

[chiro_kristin]

Quote:

Originally Posted by girl138 christianity

yes, please elaborate. I'm genuinely curious why you say this since I find nothing in the Bible to support CIO, etc. Is it just because of some authors who claim to back their parenting techniques on the Bible? (eg Ezzo)

 

[JamieCatheryn]

Protestantism might have contributed to this huge fear of/obsession with breasts America has, making breastfeeding looked down on and hidden. Christianity in general urges parents to train up and discipline (the the positive sense which may or may not include punishment) their kids, so I can see an argument for anti GD. But I don't see a direct correlation to fear of spoiling babies unless you read the bible in a *very* skewed light.

 

[cumulus]

Meredith Small, who wrote Our Babies Ourselves, also wrote "Kids, How Biology and Culture Shape the Way We Raise Young Children, another great book on the subject. You might also check out Kay S Hymowitz's Ready or Not.

"Human beings fashion the childhood their culture needs."
~ Kay S Hymowitz, Ready or Not

 

[momtoNatalee]

Quote:

Originally Posted by cumulus Meredith Small, who wrote Our Babies Ourselves, also wrote "Kids, How Biology and Culture Shape the Way We Raise Young Children, another great book on the subject. You might also check out Kay S Hymowitz's Ready or Not. "Human beings fashion the childhood their culture needs." ~ Kay S Hymowitz, Ready or Not

Thanks, I am def. going to order one of the book suggested

 

[wonderwahine]

alot of it did come from the christian puritans POV on things like co-sleeping (could cause unpure behaviour).

Also, advances in medical science fueled alot of it, because of misinformation about how disease was spread etc.

 

[VSPsMom]

I can see where the arguements for Christianity come from, but I don't buy it. The Bible says nowhere that we should let our children CIO. Of course, the Bible can be interpreted to say whatever one wants it to say...but that's a huge topic that could go on forever.

I think that a lot of the CIO methods and such came into play around the same time formula did. Women started working and things changed. We have become a "me me me" society and a time conscience one as well. Everything is about convenience for "us". If you have to go back to work then you need your sleep, therefore, let your child cry and ignore them so you can be well rested. Someone always has to be writing a new book to sell that will solve all the problems we didn't know we had!

....just my opinion.

 

[Nora'sMama]

Quote:

Originally Posted by lrlittle Also, 'Our Babies Ourselves' is AWESOME. Gives a lot of perspective on cosleeping, babywearing, and the western parenting culture in general.

ITA...the author is Meredith Small...she also has a book about older kids...I forget the title.

ETA - whoops, I see I'm redundant!

 

[Pandora114]

it comes from the whole workerbee mentality of the industrial revolution I'm guessing. Kids can't be good coal mine workers when they are constantly crying for their mommas.

 

[flapjack]

Yep, initially (at least in the UK) the big culprit was the industrial revolution. Most mothers worked in the areas where I grew up, either in their own homes (farms, farmers wives, farmhands wives) or scavenging sea coal, whilst the men worked in the mines, the shipyards and the railway works, and often parents would work alternate shifts in the mines. Because of the lax legislation (please, mamas, don't flame my ancestors) it wasn't that uncommon for a breastfeeding mother to pop her infant in the shawl and take baby down the pit with her, but toddlers and older children stayed at home with dad or grandparents. Then legislation was introduced in the 18th century that firstly prohibited children in the workplace (so the babywearing had to stop) and then restricted womens working hours, with the result that many women had to either make do on a smaller family income (and more families came down to the pits off the land, so more families were affected) or take a less family-friendly job, like domestic service.
CIO or not breastfeeding were unthinkable: those were the habits that were handed down to me.
Personally, I think the rot really started setting in with WW1 over here: this was the first time that anyone I know (of) ever started accepting the idea that something was more important than their families. Husbands were away and mothers of breastfed toddlers were required to work in munitions factories or as land girls.

 

[momtoNatalee]

Intresting...makes sense

 

[MamaInBuffalo]

Quote:

Originally Posted by romans_mum alot of it did come from the christian puritans POV on things like co-sleeping (could cause unpure behaviour).

Well...the Puritans weren't really Christians, as Christian means "Christ-Like." Jesus taught that we should love God with all of our hearts and love our neighbors as ourselves, so that was the "new covenant" that we could enjoy with God, instead of being obsessed with the old law, and 1 million rules, like the Puritans and the Pharisees.

But I do think a lot of the way American Christians view the world is from an individualistic point of view, rather than with a concern for the entire community, including their own children and the other children in the community. I think we were created for community, for the whole village raising the child- and parenting is a lot more of a "deep breath" than an anxiety attack when we break out of our individualism and ask for a little help!

okay okay, sorry about that, anyway...

 

[girl138]

Quote:

Originally Posted by momtoNatalee Just curious, why? Not saying you are wrong. Just wonder what in particular makes you say that?

here's an interesting article on the subject

getting wise to babywise