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I was at the library today with my two girls - 2.75yrs & 7m. As soon as we walked into the (little) kids' area, a lone woman reading a book - no kids in sight - immediately said hi to us. As I was arranging our coats and things out of the way, she started asking me about the girls - how old they are and what are their names. I politely answered her, while also attending to my children (getting my toddler a puzzle while I changed the baby's diaper). She continued to chat at me intermittently the whole time we were there - essentially giving a running commentary on what my kids were doing. I never ignored her, and I answered any direct question, but I didn't really engage her in conversation, either. I had no outward reason to feel uneasy about the situation, but I did. It just seemed... off to me, somehow. I'm rather shy, so I would never do that to another mom, especially if I didn't have my kids with me...<br><br>
What would others have thought in this situation? We didn't stay as long as we might have (I mean we didn't leave right away, but instead of trying to get the baby to sleep, we just left) largely because I felt uncomfortable. I tried to think of scenarios that this wasn't weird - her kids were in school; she doesn't have kids but wants them; she's an awesome aunt; she just thought my kiddos were cute. But I couldn't explain to myself why she was sitting alone in the toddler area of the public library.<br><br>
So, am I overly suspicious and paranoid? Or?
 

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She may just love kids and love being around them, I used to go curl up in the kids section and read cause it's a much more fun area to be in <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"><br><br>
That said, trust your instincts. Hurt feelings are less important then hurt kids.
 

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Was she perhaps a library volunteer?
 

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Our library has a policy forbidding adults without children (unless they are checking out children's materials) from being in the children's area. So, in that case, I may have alerted the children's librarian if I felt uncomfortable. I think this situation is exactly why they have such a policy. It just makes parents feel weird.<br><br>
With that said, I'm an introvert. I don't like chatty people, so it would annoy me that someone kept talking. I had to get my tires changed a few weeks ago, and someone in the waiting area kept talking. It was all I could do not to say, "dude! Book in hand! Do I look like I want to talk?" Of course, I didn't do that; I just stayed polite until an opportune time to leave and find an outside chair.
 

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I wouldn't have thought anything of it.<br><br>
I make small talk with people I see around town, and commenting (positively) on people's children is usually a good way to break the ice. We recently moved here, and if I never tried to approach strangers with chit chat I wouldn't have made any friends.
 

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That would have been me pre-kids and while preggo. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hide.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hide">:<br><br>
I love kids and always have, I started babysitting at 13. I was the college aged goofball on the beach who played with all kids while the others just laid in the sun. I was the wacky Aunt dancing with all the kids at a wedding, I took my nieces and nephews every chance I could-movies, museums, dinner, the theatre. Couldn't get enough!<br><br>
So- I would have done what she did more because I was interested and/or if the kids were the ages of my nieces/nephews. It was a great way to find out what the new "hot" toy/book/movie was too.<br><br>
Even to this day if I see someone with a kid my son's age I like to stop and chat if its appropriate. However I am also pretty good a picking up signals too. If the person doesn't engage or barely responds I don't pursue however in *my* experience around here they almost always do. That's how I met one of my newest "close" friends who has a boy my son's age. If I didn’t chat her up we probably would have ever met!!
 

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I just noticed that our kids are the same age, give or take a couple of weeks..<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br><br>
I probably would have done the same thing as you, as I'm a bit of an introvert. If I had the guts and the foresight, I would've called her on it by saying..."Are your kids nearby?" She would have had to explain herself then.<br><br>
Depending on how isolated I feel that day I would have either continued chatting with her or moved on. Many times though I've been chatted up about my kiddos only to find out that the other person is looking to solicit me to their church or home run daycare.<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/irked.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="irked">:.
 

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There is an overly-friendly clerk at a scrapbooking store I frequent. She is very annoying to me. I go in there all time time (she recognizes me) to use their special die-cutting system. I have used it a hundred times; I know how to use it. I follow the rules (always sign in, blah, blah). The last time I was using it, she came back to "check on me" 7 times in a matter of 20 minutes, asking the entire time if I needed help and observing the process. I assured her that I knew how to use the machine, I would not cut my fingers off, I would not hurt the machine, etc. No one else was in the store or waiting to use the machine. The final time she came back there, I pointedly asked if she would rather that I not use the machine at all. She looked perplexed. Then I asked her if she thought I was going to steal something. She said she was only trying to help, but it was annoying me and slowing me down. She must have told the manager (who I know) and the manager came back and told me not to worry; the clerk does that to everyone (???) and she's just "overly-firendly." How about "overly annoying?"
 

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I probably would have done the same thing as you, as I'm a bit of an introvert. If I had the guts and the foresight, I would've called her on it by saying..."Are your kids nearby?" She would have had to explain herself then.</div>
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I like this idea, because if she was just being friendly or trying to reach out and meet new people, it continues the conversation, but if she had ulterior motives she has to explain herself.
 

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Thats me! I am that 'over' friendly person - just trying to spread a little happiness.<br>
But i am also a little shy, so maybe I go a little over the top...... i never even thought it would freak people out. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/redface.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Embarrassment">
 

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With that said, I'm an introvert. I don't like chatty people, so it would annoy me that someone kept talking. I had to get my tires changed a few weeks ago, and someone in the waiting area kept talking. It was all I could do not to say, "dude! Book in hand! Do I look like I want to talk?" Of course, I didn't do that; I just stayed polite until an opportune time to leave and find an outside chair.</div>
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This is me too. A lot of people think I am a mean ass because I am not overly friendly. Nooo.. I'm just very introverted.
 

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When I read this post, I thought, def some type of disability which corresponds to social cues. I am friendly, I say hi, but I will not chat up some random person (have been known to chat with the cashier, store clerk, etc.) But I would get it if someone didn't feel like talking, social cues...<br><br>
That said, it could be cultural. New Englanders are really different from Montanans for example. In Montana, everyone waves at you even if they don't know you, says hello, etc., whereas in N.E. it was the cold, cold stare....
 

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My best friend is like that-- she's just outgoing and loves kids!
 

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I appreciate friendliness, but to me she crossed the border, since you obviously were not into the conversation. I don't like when people like that are so into their own needs that they don't take a hint.
 

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ohmygod, I would have high tailed it out of there <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"><br><br>
I get creeped out easy and I'm shy so that would have been too much for me.
 

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Trust your instincts! Was she at least looking at childrens books?<br><br>
One of the libraries here (I don't know if it is all of them, I know for sure one branch though) has a rule about adults w/o children being in the childrens section. Though I've gone by myself to get booksfor my children and never been approached, however the librarians likely recognize me from going in WITH the children.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>normajean</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/10291271"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I wouldn't have thought anything of it.<br><br>
I make small talk with people I see around town, and commenting (positively) on people's children is usually a good way to break the ice. We recently moved here, and if I never tried to approach strangers with chit chat I wouldn't have made any friends.</div>
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This was me when I moved to a new town too. Guess I am overly friendly. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hide.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hide">:<br><br>
At least I usually have DD with me.
 
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