[njbeachgirl]

Just wondering if anyone else is overwhelmed with STUFF, and space, and if you found any good simplifying methods that work for you.

DH and I have been very lucky to have family and friends who are very generous with both gifts and their hand me downs, but at this point it is out of control. When I was still working (before dd was born) we bought a big house with a lot of square footage and the stuff just piled up. I really can't stand having all this junk I don't need and would like to downsize and also move to a smaller house. DH won't even consider it and thinks bigger is better. But he is not the one who is expected to clean and keep things in order. I know a lot of people would like to have the problem of "too much space/too much stuff" but it's really overwhelming for me. Plus I think it's good to live a simpler life, and we are only planning on having one more DC, so it's not like we need a huge house.

Anyway I guess I'm just venting. We have virtually no money left after we pay the mortgage and the bills each month, and it's so frustrating. Heating and cooling the house costs an arm and a leg. I just wish I could start all over and simplify!!!

 

[Vanessa]

((hugs)) You can't change your actual house at this point since you aren't in agreement with your dh, but you can start to put boundaries and categories on the things that you do own. You can create the house that you crave and need. Start slow, be steady and you'll get there.

A really great book I just read is "It's all too much" by Peter Walsh. I've been on my own decluttering/simplifying journey for a while now, and he helped me get off the plateau that I was on. Check your library for it.

 

[Be Here]

"It's All Too Much" is awesome. I downloaded the audiobook to my ipod and listen to Peter as I declutter. It's so encouraging to have that voice in your ear telling you its okay to release things.

 

[mightymoo]

I second Peter Walsh's book.

My thoughts are this - you may have too much space, but just becuase you have too much space doesn't mean you need to have too much stuff - bigger spaces are more work to clean, but if you reduce the stuff it will make it easier even if you do have a bigger house.

Rather than focusing on how the house looks to start, focus on the in/out flow - set a goal of getting rid of X number of things this month (join the monthly challenge) and focus on getting it out completely. If you keep up with this, you'll start to see progress!

Consider clearing out whole rooms too - if you have a spare room, set it up as minimally as possible and don't use it for anything but say a guest room, shut it off so you don't have to maintain it.

 

[Leta]

The first thing to do is take out the trash.

Then, set your time for 15, 30, or 60 minutes (but no longer) and find 10, 20, or 50 things to get rid of. At the very beginning, count EVERYTHING- every return bill envelope, every broken rubber band, every gum wrapper, everything. As you progress, you will get more of a feeling for what to count.

Do this every day. You can find 15 minutes to get rid of 10 things. If 10 is too many, then do 5. Pick a number of items as your goal. My favorite one that I've seen is 2007 things out of the house in 2007. There's half a year yet, so pick a goal that works for you.

For the time being, do not obsess over recycling things. You are on a journey that will lead to vastly reduced trash production over the course of your life. For right now, put in a trash bag and get it out of your house. If you, your DP, or your DC are trash pickers (a.k.a. "rescuers") use opaque trash bags.

For the time being, do not try to sell things. Wait until you feel more under control. For right now, just drop stuff off at Vinnie's, Goodwill, wherever.

For every non-consumable item that comes in your house, two items must leave- right away. It's a rule now.

I am speaking as a reformed pack rat. It can get better, but you have to work at it.

 

[eden/averymum]

I feel your pain. daily. my husband is a pack rat and kids seem to just accumulate masses of stuff without me even relaizing.

I do feel very stifled by it all.

 

[PeacefulSeams]

Peter Walsh's book is awesome!! I got it from the library and I've decided it would be a good book to just buy. I really think it is one of the best decluttering books I have read.

 

[njbeachgirl]

I busted out a big plastic gaarbage bag and practically filled it up, just from the master bedroom and the bathroom. And to think these two rooms didn't even LOOK that cluttered!

I feel better already! I'm going to try to tear myself away from MDC and do the office now

 

[2GR8KIDS]

Since you and your husband aren't in agreement on downsizing, you could start by getting rid of as much as you can, organizing what's left, then even closing off rooms or areas that you don't use. Don't fill up space just because it's there- if all your glassware fits into 1 cabinet, don't spread it into 2 just because you can. Once your husband sees that there is room for the things and activities that he thinks are important, and that you have room to spare, maybe he will be more open to the idea of moving to a smaller space.

In the meantime, try using your extra space to your advantage. A larger house doesn't necessarily have to be harder to keep tidy. We recently moved into a larger house and I am finding it easier to stay organized than when we lived smaller. I have room to keep all of our books in one place, all of our toys in one place, all of our CDs in one place, etc. I can store lesser used things like extra dishes and holiday decorations so they are easy to access. It is now much quicker for me to pick up because everything has a place that is accessible without me having to shift stuff around. Before, things were squirreled away all over the house- these books go in the living room and those in the kids' room; this game goes in this closet and that one goes under the bed; etc.

There is more space to clean, but there is more open space which makes cleaning easier. I can vacuum the rooms without constantly bumping into furniture and walls.

 

[momazon4]

I went to a dear friends house today. I have always been extremely jealous of her clean house which is about 2x as big as mine. We had to go to her kid's room to get some fans I wanted to borrow. Both of their closets were open and I was amazed. Their rooms are clean but their whole house really has no STUFF in it. I want that! Off to find the garbage bags...

 

[Leta]

Quote:

Originally Posted by njbeachgirl I busted out a big plastic gaarbage bag and practically filled it up, just from the master bedroom and the bathroom. And to think these two rooms didn't even LOOK that cluttered! I feel better already! I'm going to try to tear myself away from MDC and do the office now

Yay! Good for you! It does feel good, doesn't it?

 

[Vanessa]

Quote:

Originally Posted by njbeachgirl I busted out a big plastic gaarbage bag and practically filled it up, just from the master bedroom and the bathroom. And to think these two rooms didn't even LOOK that cluttered! I feel better already! I'm going to try to tear myself away from MDC and do the office now

Yeah!!! It's so much easier once you just get started.

 

[njbeachgirl]

Oh man, I'm really on a kick now. I have enough stuff set aside to have a garage sale next weekend. plus another big black garbage bag filled. It is amazing the amount of JUNK you can find in drawers and closets!