[emmsmama]

My son is 3 yrs. old and not retractable yet. A few times in the last month he has woken up from his nap screaming and crying saying his bum hurts. When I take off his diaper (he is potty trained, but not for naptime and nighttime yet) he has a huge erection and it really does look like it is painfully taut. What can I do to help him out. I know if I go to the uro in the area he will tell me to circ b/c he has told numerous other moms in my area to circ and also chastises them for not retracting

I know my son does not need to be circ'd, but he is VERY uncomfortable with the erections.

 

[Frankly Speaking]

There are two things happening and they are both very normal.

Erections on awakening are very normal for men of all ages. It's called "morning wood" and is because the normal condition for males is to hold the blood flow to the erectile tissue back to a degree. When the tension on the penis is relaxed, blood will flow into it and produce an erection. It appears that there is some confusion between the brain and the penis on waking that causes it to relax producing an erection.

The other thing that is going on is your son's body is disolving the natural adhesions between the foreskin and the glans. This is not an even process and there will be spots that are still adhered with loose areas all around. His morning wood erections are putting stress on those remaining adhesions and are pulling at them and that can cause minor pain. It is temporary in nature and will soon pass.

Think about it like this: "Growing pains" are something that are common and well known. They are caused by rapid bone growth as the child matures. Yeah, it hurts, but what do you do about it? Well, there's really not much you can do about it other than comfort the child as much as possible and it's the same as this pain your son is experiencing. It is a normal situation that some boys have to go through and simply shows that he is a normal growing boy. It probably feels about the same as a paper cut. It hurts but It'll feel better when it stops and as soon as the erection subsides (a few minutes) it will quit hurting. It isn't nearly as bad as a circumcision and the healing period would have been.

Frank

 

[emmsmama]

It does look like he is just starting to be retractable a VERY small amount. I also know that this is the age that a lot of boys who are intact start to become retractable so I figured it had something to do with the natural seperation process starting.

It took me 10 mins. to calm him down on Sat. and it wasn't until the erection went down that he finally started to be consolable at all.

I am usually the one giving other moms info when their docs mislead them into thinking there is a prob with their ds's intact penis, but this time I was stumped myself. Thanks for sharing your wisdom Frank

P.S. - You know the gal I shared on the board last week that was told her ds would have to be circ'd even though they never gave her a specific reason, just that her son couldn't pee and was having pain. Well it turns out he had a bladder infection, yet she still went to the quack urologist in our area and he told her that "his peehole is too small" (those were her words). He scheduled a circ for Feb. 21st for the little guy. I sent a message to her imploring her to come to this board for help b/c there is no way that he would be fine up until 18 mths. and then all of a sudden his "peehole is too small", yet it seems to be functional enough to satisfy the uro until Feb. 21st. What a crock

 

[Frankly Speaking]

Quote:

Originally Posted by emmsmama she still went to the quack urologist in our area and he told her that "his peehole is too small" (those were her words). He scheduled a circ for Feb. 21st for the little guy. I sent a message to her imploring her to come to this board for help b/c there is no way that he would be fine up until 18 mths. and then all of a sudden his "peehole is too small", yet it seems to be functional enough to satisfy the uro until Feb. 21st. What a crock

You are absolutely right about this one. Urine retention due to phimosis is an emergency situation, like TODAY! It can cause bladder damage and must be resolved immediately. If not today, then tomorrow if he is catheterized. This doctor must have a payment due on the Mercedes about the end of the month.

We can only hope she comes here and reads about all of the other mothers who have come with the same sad story and now months or years later, have happy, healthy and whole sons because they got the right information. There must be a hundred or more of them now. As far as I know, there has never been a child circumcised after a visit to a ped, FP or urologist and a follow up visit to this board. Hopefully, she will visit here and get just enough information to make her research more before she lets this happen to her son.

By the way, did you mention to her that her son could, at worst case scenario, get a simple dorsal slit to open the foreskin instead of a full radical circumcision? It's not as good as no intervention at all but is far preferred over a full radical circumcison. I'll bet the urologist didn't even offer that option. That may just be enough to get her here!

Frank

 

[emmsmama]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Frankly Speaking You are absolutely right about this one. Urine retention due to phimosis is an emergency situation, like TODAY! It can cause bladder damage and must be resolved immediately. If not today, then tomorrow if he is catheterized. This doctor must have a payment due on the Mercedes about the end of the month. We can only hope she comes here and reads about all of the other mothers who have come with the same sad story and now months or years later, have happy, healthy and whole sons because they got the right information. There must be a hundred or more of them now. As far as I know, there has never been a child circumcised after a visit to a ped, FP or urologist and a follow up visit to this board. Hopefully, she will visit here and get just enough information to make her research more before she lets this happen to her son. By the way, did you mention to her that her son could, at worst case scenario, get a simple dorsal slit to open the foreskin instead of a full radical circumcision? It's not as good as no intervention at all but is far preferred over a full radical circumcison. I'll bet the urologist didn't even offer that option. That may just be enough to get her here! Frank

I think this guy has paid for several Mercedes from just the stories I've heard on 1 local board!

I didn't suggest the dorsal slit, but thanks for the info. She has two older sons who are intact so I am hoping she will cancel the appointment for the end of February. Her youngest son went into the hospital on the weekend with possible meningitis (tap came back negative and he is back home now), so she has had a lot going on right now. In a week I was going to pm her again and ask her how things were going with her second youngest little one. I am currently trying to find out where to report this uro to because more than one mom has went to him and ended up having her son circ'd and all of them have commented on how he gave them crap for not retracting. Any doc who tells someone they should have been retracting has no clue about the intact foreskin!

It is not just the fact that these little guys are being damaged by this uro that bothers me, it is also the fact that he is perpetuating the myth that intact boys will have to be circumcised later for one reason for another. One of the moms on the local board I am on used to be against circ, until her 2.5 yr. old was circ'd because a doc said it was necessary. She is now VERY pro-circ. as a result.

 

[Frankly Speaking]

If you will go to the "Warning for Parents of Intact Boys" thread, you will find information for contacting John Geisheker, the attorney for Doctors Opposing Circumcision. John will write a free letter to the doctor on his legal letterhead for free. Letters from law firms threatening action against them for retracting boys will make an impression!

Frank

 

[emmsmama]

I will go check out that thread. Does that apply for Canadian doctors? I have a good update on the story with this mom though I would still like to scare that doc into actually picking up a book and getting a clue. But anyway, the little guy that was schedule for the circ just finished his round of meds for a bladder infection and is peeing fine and pain-free once again. Mom cancelled the operation today.

 

[joandsarah77]

I would start retracting his foreskin to relieve the tightness. It helped with my boys.

Bad information- do not listen to this person.