[*LoveBugMama*]

I coslept with Noah until he was 18-20 months old.
He then decided (by himself) that he wanted to try to sleep in the crib. And he did.
Now he sleeps in a toddlerbed and crawls into my bed sometime during the night.

I sit next to his bed in a rockingchair until he falls asleep every night. I love to sit there and watch him go to sleep.

But SOOO many people are telling me that he will NEVER be able to go to sleep on his own.

Yeah, I can see me parenting him to sleep the night before his 18th birthday...

But just out of curiosity: When DID you stop parenting your child to sleep?

Oh, and BTW: The people telling me this, are the same people that told me that cosleeping would mean that Noah NEVER would sleep in his own bed....

:

 

[*LoveBugMama*]

Does this mean that all of you are still parenting your 22 year old son and your 34 year old daughter to sleep?

 

[MamaOui]

I see that you have not gotten any responses yet, but I cannot answer your question because I am still parenting my 3.5 year old and 21 month old to sleep in one way or another. We have a family bed. Ds#1 gets read to and then a parent lays with him until he falls asleep (a very easy process because he falls asleep within minutes) and ds#2 gets read to, snuggled, rocked, whatever he needs (a longer process which can take up to an hour, but usually more like a half hour). But I certainly don't think our boys will need to be parented to sleep when they are 18.

 

[DaryLLL]

OK, mine are older. I think I did some form of parenting to sleep until they were at least 8 yrs old, as that is when they left the family bed. I wouldn't have to stay until they were asleep, but would do a form of tuck-in, story, talk, etc.

I think I had to lie with them until they were at least 6 yrs old.

 

[mamacrab]

I parented my daughter all the way to sleep until she was almost 4. Then we switched to stories, lullabies, tuck-in, kiss goodnight- and she falls asleep on her own!

 

[dharmama]

My own parents parented me to sleep into high school!

It changed over the years from snuggles and reading books to maybe brushing my hair or rubbing my back or just talking. But they always came into my room and "tucked me in."

When I was older (middle school/high school) it was more of a "check in"....how was your day.....do you feel ready for your test tomorrow etc. And always a kiss and I love you.

There's something about talking to your parents in the dark that made it easier to well...talk about stuff.

Did this routine affect my ability to sleep alone later?

Well....I lived away at college, my room-mate didn't tuck me in and I managed to sleep just fine!

Now.....I must say I do greatly prefer if DH and I go to bed at the same time so that we can snuggle and talk etc.

~Erin

 

[mamaduck]

When my oldest was closet to 4 yo. I was laying down with him to help him fall asleep and he suddenly said, "Mom, you could just go in your own bed now. I don't need you here, and your breath actually kind of stinks anyway."

My 3 yo still needs a parent in the room until he falls asleep.

As other posters have pointed out, having this quiet time with our children every night as they get older is not such a bad thing. Its a good time to listen and be affectionate with each other. So many parents are upset that their older children are not affectionate and don't really tell them things. They don't recognize that in some cases, they "trained" them that way as younger children when they didn't respect their feelings adequately.

 

[darlindeliasmom]

This thread is great, looking at the positive side of parenting to sleep. I still lay in bed and read books to my 6 y-old DD; then we do lights out and our nighttime prayer/looking back over the day. and I have to agree that I am so glad for the opportunities to talk things out that the darkness and safety of mama's arms gives her.
Little ones try so hard to be brave and do the things we ask of them. I knew dd was upset that her best friend was staying another year in kindergaretn, but she was always showing a brave face...except at bedtime when she would let her grief and fears--and tears--flow. I remember childhood sadnesses that I shared with my sisters or with my stuffed animals, but not with my parents. I like it better this way!!

 

[lilirose]

sorry, having to remove all posts with personal info due to an online stalker.

 

[*LoveBugMama*]

Thank you all for great stories, mamas!

I LOVE to parent my son to sleep, and would be really sad if he didn`t need me there anymore.

He is sooo active and full of energy during the day, so our evenings are special to the both of us.

He starts out in my lap in the rockingchair, and ends up in his bed holding my hand.

I remember being afraid to go to sleep at night when I was a child. My mom was married to a really abusive man, and I was so afraid that if I fell asleep I wouldn`t be able to hear my mom cry for help if he decided to beat her up that night...

I will do anything in my power to make sure that Noah has nothing but wonderful memories of me being there for him every night!

 

[*LoveBugMama*]

 

[MamaOui]

Mamaduck, I am still laughing after reading your post.

 

[USAmma]

I'm planning to read my dd's bedtime stories until they ask me not to anymore.

As far as what to say to your "concerned" friends. I would just say that you enjoy it and you don't mind, so what's the big deal? And BTW they are capable of going to bed on their own. We just eased my 2 year old into it after a good bedtime routine and lots of stories, etc. Once the light is off she settles down, stays in bed, and sings herself to sleep.

Darshani