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or think you are overreacting? Anyone else run into this situation. My 10 month old daughter has alot of health problems. She has severe reflux, is allergic to pretty much everything and most likely has asthma. She has had reflux since birth and has been medicated since 2 months. Today we had a really bad episode and it scared me. She was trying to eat a banana and it all refluxed back up and then got stuck in her throat. She was gagging and choking and then swallowed it only to have it come back up again. She actually stopped breathing for about 10 seconds and it scared the crap out of me. She is allergic to all gluten, dairy, goats milk, soy, corn, tomatoes, strawberries, peanuts, beef, pork and many other things. It is near to impossible to find anything safe for her to eat. She also has breathing problems and has been on an inhaler for 2 months (we have to use an aerochamber over her face to do it and she HATES it!). They haven't said asthma yet. The initial diagnosis two months ago was bronchitis but it has never gone away. Well the cough did but the breathing problems didn't. Last night she was gasping for air in the middle of the night and I heard her over the monitor. It was scary. We gave her a breathing treatment and she went back to sleep. Just when she seems to be getting a bit better she gets worse again. Anyways pretty much everyone we know acts as if we must be exaggerating or overreacting. When I say reflux I hear 20 stories from moms, "Oh my baby had severe reflux too, he spat up all the time." Grrrr! That makes me so angry. No your baby did NOT have severe reflux. Did your baby on a regular basis reflux pure stomach acid back up and scream as it burned his throat? Did he silently regurgitate all day? Did he have episodes where he stopped breathing? No! Or the allergies, everyone says oh well how do you know she is allergic to those things. Naturopathic testing isn't true. Well considering before we took her off that stuff she developed welts all over her body when we tried to feed her I would assume they are probably telling the truth! And of course the possible asthma - they say I am overreacting and she is probably just fine. Really? Is it really just fine for a 10 month old baby to wake up at night gasping for air? To have a chronic cough? To whistle when she breathes from wheezing? No that's not normal. I am not looking for attention. I don't want sympathy. I just want people to acknowledge that our daughter DOES have problems and that we are not stupid for being worried or for having to carefully safeguard. She picked up a cheerio in the nursery at church and I grabbed it out of her hand and the other mother in there basically said I was ridiculous for taking it out of her hand, "What would one little cheerio hurt?" Well considering she is allergic to ALL gluten and it give her horrible diarrhea which leaves her with a red, raw diaper rash I think it would probably be best if I DIDN'T feed her that cheerio. Does anyone else deal with people acting as if your child's problems are just no big deal?
 

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Well, I heard all the "My child had reflux too" stories as well, and this is with a child who has a feeding tube, central line, and really huge health problems. I think it is more people trying to relate and not realizing the magnitude of things. I had a son with typical baby reflux as well (and lots of it), so I very clearly understand the difference.

My usual thing was to let my dd puke on them. Seriously, it usually did the trick.

I hope your baby starts improving soon with her reflux and allergies. (((hug)))
 

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Yeah, I used to deal with that when DS was an infant/toddler. I would try to convince people of the seriousness of his issues, and all I got were those condescending looks that people reserve for the mentally ill. I lost family relationships and friends over this. It was a waste of my precious energy. If you need support, talk to other SN parents and learn to ignore the well-meaning comments from total idiots (I just smile and walk away). I think that our reality is so different, it's hard if not impossible for others to conceive of what we do for our kids every day.
 

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Yes, I've been there too (food allergies/celiac--and I've seen the inside damage which was enough to make me not care too much people's opinions. Right now in addition to gluten/soy/dairy Andrew is off of all starches and grains; A severe refluxer as in stopped eating/failure to thrive/ spit up blood still on very high dose meds at nearly three years old as well; now pdd-nos/autism). My point I guess is some people do understand...but you are unlikely to meet them in your everyday life!
Strangers don't bug me as much as family who still don't get it. I don't do a lot of explaining, by the way. I do tell people Andrew has celiac disease and will get very sick if he gets certain foods and drinks--and I generally don't leave him without myself or my hubby. People seem to accept the celiac thing without thinking nutso mom with the allergies. And they don't know enough about it in general to know what a person with celiac can and can't eat--I don't explain about the rest much unless someone asks. At church in fact I take my boys out of the nursery during snack time and then when it is over I personally clean up as needed. I don't feel that strange, people have been nice, but who knows how I come across (don't so much care...)
I did wonder something about your daughter--have you ever had a swallow study done? I ask because if she is aspirating that would possibly explain some of what you are experiencing (including the breathing problems). It would be another thing, I know, but an important one. If she is there are things they can do (in terms of thickness of foods/liquids). My son aspirates or did anyway...
 

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As the previous posters said, all of the time. Ds1 had horrid reflux, not as bad as your daughter sounds like, but still bad. He had the nonstop screaming, vomiting up everythign he ate, barely able to nurse, loosing weight and what the pedi called "urping" where it came up in his mouth and he swallowed it back down. He lost alot of weight and it is probably the primary reason he has so many feeding problems even now and he is so under size for his age. But people always said "oh all babies spit up some."
: I was doing laundry twice a day because all of his clothes were covered in vomit. It was nuts.

Now with his PDD NOS I know alot of people think he is just acting up. My SIL once told me I should just spank him and show him who is boss.
: I felt like saying "excuse me, but your kid has nothing wrong with him and is a total PITA so I don't think I will be taking advice from you on how to raise my special needs child." Some people just don't get it.
 

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I can relate, even though the issues our kids have are very different. Sometimes I feel like people are trying to make me feel better, but what they're really doing is being dissmissive, in denial, or worse.
 

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I can relate only our issues are more behavior/mental issues then health. It's really really annoying when people act like your lying.

I hope your kiddo gets past all this stuff. I absolutely hate to hear about kids going through all sorts of health problems.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by bri276 View Post
I can relate, even though the issues our kids have are very different. Sometimes I feel like people are trying to make me feel better, but what they're really doing is being dissmissive, in denial, or worse.
Yes, this is what we dealt with more when ds was younger...before the therapy and diagnoses. Then it came to a point where they all shut up because they could SEE for themselves. That was a wonderful feeling for a whole different reason.
 

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I was also the crazy food allergy mom. My inlaws thought I went overboard until my ds started to have a severe allergic reaction at MIL's house and we couldn't figure out what it was to.

The pdd-nos isn't a problem with my family. Both of my SIL's are involved in the health care profession and my sil has been suggesting for almost 2 years that William has autism. We have a hard time with people in public and those issues though. Most people thought he was a brat for a long time. Once he hit 3 and his speech was substantially delayed a lot more people recognized that he had special needs. Now that his speech is improving it's not so easy to tell anymore. The was a guy at the store the other day that was looking at me crazy because I was encouraging and praising William the whole time we were there. I tried to explain to him that ds doesn't do well in those situations and that we encouraged him when he was doing well.

I think for the most part people just don't understand. I also think that to many parents when they do have a small issue with their child that it is a huge deal to them and they can't see past it sometimes.
 
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