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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
So my MWs suggested Perineal Massage to make the birthing easier... However I read the pamphlet, and I don't know if I'm entirely sold on it. For one thing, I don't know if I can reach... And I don't think I want Dh to "participate"<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"><br><br>
So, for anyone who's done it... Any tips? Does it really help in the end?
 

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I was unsure too, however I did them. Did it help? I think I would have torn a LOT more with as fast as DS was born if we hadn't.<br><br>
As for DH's participation...he'll be seeing a lot more of you with the delivery of your child<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> He'll get over it and it will hopefully help you in the long run!
 

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Well, thats the thing... Dh doesn't want to be at the "Business" end of the birth. He just wants to be facing me and not see whats going on.<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> Besides, I have to admit, I'm a little modest when it comes to stuff like this...<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/innocent.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="shy">
 

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It is amazing what happens in the delivery room! He may surprise you! DH was the same way. Now that DS is here, he was sooo excited to see him come into the world. I even had it written in our borth plan that I would cut the cord (after DH was offered the oppertunity) because we were both pretty sure he would not do it. Well, he did! I am STILL very surprised by that!<br><br>
BUT......<br><br>
I also get your feelings. Doing them yourself... not sure how realistic it would be at 38 weeks<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1"> You have to do what is right for you. I would try though. With or without dh's help. You could do it with a cover over you to provide for some modisty if you feel better about it. It could be doen by "feel" only once he's in th erea.<br><br>
Good Luck<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 

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We tried perineal massage once with my first pregnancy. It was uncomfortable and just made me (and my DH too I think) feel icky. I did tear with my first baby but I think that had more to do with his being posterior, my pushing position and my pushing too hard/too fast.<br><br>
I did not do the massage with either of the subsequent pregnancies. My last baby was 9lb12 and I did not tear at all. I gave birth standing up and took lots of time at crowning just letting everything stretch.<br><br>
I have since read that peri massage really isn't that helpful anyway. I wil try to find some links.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Plaid Leopard</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8111861"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">We tried perineal massage once with my first pregnancy. It was uncomfortable and just made me (and my DH too I think) feel icky.</div>
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same with us. we did it 2 or 3 times and then stopped. I had a c-section so I can't say about tearing, but I have also read that it is not as effective as once thought.
 

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we did it with ds1 and i think it worked well. both of my mw def thought it worked. i did tear but just a little bit (not sutured and healed within a week) we did it often during the last month...<br>
i think it's important to keep it from getting painful or uncomfy...you want to "train" your brain to relax as soon as there is pressure on your peri.<br><br>
that said, we didn't do it b/f ds2 was born...mainly b/c ds1 stays up later than dh and it was hard to find the time. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">
 

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Hubby and I laughed when the Dr gave us the paper with that info on it. He is military and at the time had two friends with wives due a week after us and all had the same Dr. They TALKED about it. Hubby and I did this and enjoyed it, like having sex to induce baby, something fun that was also helpful. What I would give to have hubby here to play with and help stretch me before this baby comes rather then being in Iraq.<br><br>
Could I do it myself? Not near as fun and I do not think I could reach honestly. Will I try. yup. I am comfy with myself. I will turn pink and laugh at myself and try to think of the joy in my life.<br><br>
I wish you peace and health in this, what ever you choose to do thats comfy for you!<br><br>
Blessings,<br>
Kimmy
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>krismarie</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8112841"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">i think it's important to keep it from getting painful or uncomfy...you want to "train" your brain to relax as soon as there is pressure on your peri.</div>
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I think that is a big part of the massage, experiencing something a little like crowning to help you prepare for it. That being said, there are most definitely 2 different schools of thought on whether it works or not to actually stretch the perineum. Keeping up with your kegels will help you to learn to relax your pelvic floor completely too, so don't forget about those!
 

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We did it. I'm not sold that it helped. The stretching of a baby coming out is very different than what hands can do-at least that's the way it seemed to me.<br><br>
I think the massage I did to myself while pushing was more of a benefit (I was squatting in a birthing pool at the time). The only place I tore (very tiny one) was in the place I could not reach.<br><br>
Of course saying that it was good practice for <b>relaxing</b> while stretching. And DH really enjoyed doing it. It usually was followed by some natural induction sex or applying evening primrose oil. DH would also warm up to it by rubbing my lower back with arnica oil and that was really, really nice. What super pregnant momma doesn't want a back rub?
 

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Dh massaged my perineum when I was pregnant with #1. I had a normal vaginal birth, relatively easy, but still had tearing. I did not enjoy the perineal massage and only had it done because I thought it would help prevent tearing. Now I'm pregnant with #2 and I'm not having any of that (massage), even though my midwife suggested it. I don't know if I would have had a worse tear if dh hadn't done perineal massage on me. I do know, however, that whether you tear is partially determined by genetics so this time I'm just going to let it play out...if I tear, I tear...
 

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My midwife recommended it when I was pregnant with #1, but she does not anymore. She said that all her latest research has shown that you can tear more when you interfere with nature.
 
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