so i'm wondering whether i've crossed the line between attachment parenting and permissive parenting. am i too soft? my 3.5 yr old plain old doesn't listen. for example, she will step on me (i'm laying on the bed and she walks back and forth over me) i tell her to not step on me, then she steps on me walking the other way. this sort of non-listening goes on in many contexts throughout the day. she is also VERY whiny. the other day i took my 1.5 yr old somewhere and left the 3.5 yr old with my husband. right before i left emily (the 3.5 yr old) was in her normal operating mode and dh was constantly fussing. i was hesitant to leave because i didn't want emily to stress out dh. anyway, i left, and dh said the instant i walked out the door she was a perfect child. she remained that way until i returned home. i'm thinking it is because maybe she thinks she doesn't have to behave with me. perhaps i don't have the firm follow through that she needs. perhaps i make too many excuses and take on too much of the responsibility for her behavior in effort to understand her behavior. i'm one who is often analyzing and saying "she's tired" or "why shouldn't she be able to (paint, etc)". maybe i've read about these ideas in ap books but taken it too far. dh thinks maybe it has something to do kylie. when it is just dh and emily she isn't competing for attention. emily does not play by herself. if she is building with blocks for example, she wants you to sit and watch. she is ever demanding to play games, role play, etc. recently kylie has started using the potty. emily has starting role playing as a baby. between all this with emily and what i consider age appropriate clinginess in kylie, i'm ready to check out of this job called mom. i've having serious depression issues and i think a lot of it has to do with this. today i find myself wondering if i've just dug a deep pit for myself in effort to parent gently. yes my children know i love them, but they also walk all over me. where do i go from here?