[lyric1989]

I live with my boyfriend and he has his daughter every weekend - she is 10.

She is really a good child, but rarely will do anything by herself. She does not ever play alone in her room and barely even goes in there. Mostly she follows me around from room to room. I do enjoy her company for the most part, but I really need more personal space.

Any advice on how to get it - without being mean? I don't feel it is my place to "order her to go to her room", but I really wish she would play on her own sometimes. It is kind of like she thinks I am there to play with her - and I don't mind it sometimes, but I don't feel I should have to do so much.

How do I politely ask for personal space? Or should I just give up on having it?

 

[oldsmom]

It's not your job to be there for her every waking minute.

I would recommend talking with your boyfriend and seeing if he can talk with his daughter about this.

As a stepmom, if I wanted space when the kids were around, I would tell them I needed a breather and either go to my room and close the door, or leave the house to go do something.

 

[greenemami]

Yup, you need to speak up, either to your bf or the daughter. At 10, she is old enough to understand personal space. Where is your bf during this time? Ask him to step in and distract her more often-she'll get more quality time with just dad and you get some downtime on the weekends, win-win.

 

[stepmomjack]

Oh this reminds me of when my two youngest step kids were ten and twelve I couldn't even go to the bathroom and I would open the door and they would be standing there waiting for me. It is flattering that she likes to be with you and it doesn't last long trust me. When it bothered me I just told the kids I was going to have a nap or I was going out to visit a friend and I would be back later. They didn't seem to mind and found ways to entertain themselves while I was away.