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Thanks to the person who suggested that I cross-post this. I would really like some help, and am at a bit of a loss. It is soooo frustrating when everything I read and hear is completely different from what the medical professionals I should be able to "trust" are telling me. A few very helpful people gave some great advice in finding your tribe and listed some resources in my other post, but I welcome any information and/or recommendations that you have! Unfortunately, everyone else I know in real life has circed, so my good friends are not much help on this subject. Here's my post from finding your tribe in Missouri:<br><br>
Hi all. I am looking for some advice on a good dr to see in STL. At my (uncircumsised) son's 9 month appointment, our (mainstream) pediatrician tugged on my son's penis (until I stopped her) and pronounced he had phimosis. She gave me a recommendation for a urolgist. Because I knew we were switching drs soon, I did not call. At our appointment with the new drs (a more naturally minded practice), the FNP we saw was concerned, and the Dr agreed, that my son (now 13 mos) probably had phimosis.<br><br>
I asked the new dr about my options, and long story short, he recommended trying the steriod cream option (as opposed to circumcision). My son has had no medical issues with his "phimosis" (no UTIs, etc.). I would like to get a third opinion before I try the steriod cream/go see a urologist.<br><br>
Do you know of a good non-circ friendly dr in the St. Louis area? Thanks!!
 

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yea, your baby is fine. normal. leave the cream at the pharmacy. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/irked.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="irked"><br><br>
you might find <a href="http://www.drmomma.org/2010/01/phony-phimosis-diagnosis.html" target="_blank">this post</a> helpful. it also has lots of links at the end.
 

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You don't need a third opinion, or a urologist, and your son does not need steroid cream, or "checking" of his foreskin. Your son is NORMAL! Phimosis is a trumped up way of saying, "his foreskin doesn't retract yet" which is totally normal for a boy of his age, and normal for many other boys even into adolescence - it will become retractable all by itself in its own good time without any help from anybody, except maybe your son playing with it.<br><br>
The people you have gotten this advice about are badly uninformed about intact penises. Here are a few articles for you to read about the normal development of the foreskin. Once you've read them, you will know more than any of these doctors, and can pass them along to them to educate THEM, so they won't give bad advice to any more intact boys.<br><br><a href="http://www.cirp.org/library/normal/" target="_blank">http://www.cirp.org/library/normal/</a><br><a href="http://www.mothering.com/health/protect-your-uncircumcised-son-expert-medical-advice-parents" target="_blank">http://www.mothering.com/health/prot...advice-parents</a><br><a href="http://www.kindredcommunity.com/articles/only-clean-what-is-seen-reversing-the-epidemic-of-forcible-foreskin-retractions/p/1253" target="_blank">http://www.kindredcommunity.com/arti...actions/p/1253</a><br><br>
Glad you found this board. There are a lot of other mothers here who have learned about the ignorance of doctors the hard way, and have become knowledgeable about the intact penis by long study and sharing with other mothers of intact boys. You will find a lot of good resources here for raising an intact son.<br><br>
Gillian
 

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Do not use the steroid cream. Steroid cream is for <i>adult</i> men and is to be combined with stretching exercises that are inappropriate for children.<br><br>
Non retractability is developmentally <b>normal</b> for prepubescent males. Retractability isn't possible till after both separation has occurred and the sphincter at the end of the foreskin loosens. The ages at which these things happens varies greatly.
 

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My son is 3 and still doesn't retract. It is totally normal and as long as he can pee, his penis is functioning just fine <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">. Don't worry about the docs, they are wrong.
 

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Discussion Starter #6
Thank you to everyone!! This thread was soooo helpful, and I also did another hours worth of research last night using this site and a few others. You guys here on MDC are amazing!!
 

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Might be a good idea to print out the AAP statement on intact penis care to show that Dr. I can only imagine how many normal boys he is sending off for circumcision <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"><br><br><a href="http://www.cirp.org/library/normal/aap/" target="_blank">http://www.cirp.org/library/normal/aap/</a>
 

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Phimosis cannot be detected in a baby. but it sounds like you got the info you need. I am always astonished at peds' utter lack of knowledge and shear ignorance. be sure to keep their meddling hands off your LO's penis and he is sure to be fine<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/thumb.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="thumbs up">
 

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Phimosis in a child is a phony uninformed diagnosis. As PPs have already stated, the foreskin is adhered to the glans sort of like a fingernail is adhered to the finger.<br><br>
In puberty, hormones will be released that will in time break down the attachments.<br><br>
Your safest bet right now is to be sure no one touches his penis. Even 'taking a look' or 'seeing if it moves' or 'checking it' can cause small tears and open him up to infections and scarring that can lead to paraphimosis or true phimosis later in life.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Claire and Boys</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/15415050"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Might be a good idea to print out the AAP statement on intact penis care to show that Dr. I can only imagine how many normal boys he is sending off for circumcision <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"><br><br><a href="http://www.cirp.org/library/normal/aap/" target="_blank">http://www.cirp.org/library/normal/aap/</a></div>
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Exactly! This is the reason you hear so many stories that start "a friend of my grandfather's cousin had to be circumcised when he was 14"
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Fyrestorm</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/15415151"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Exactly! This is the reason you hear so many stories that start "a friend of my grandfather's cousin had to be circumcised when he was 14"</div>
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Exactly! Before the age of internet, my brother "had" to be circumcised at 6 years old because he wasn't able to retract. His circumcision was 100% unnecessary. He was peeing fine and had no infections but the doc thought it was past time that he should be able to retract by and said it was necessary. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/angry.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="angry"> My parents were at a stage in their lives where that hadn't learned to question docs like they do now.
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>glongley</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/15413495"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">You don't need a third opinion, or a urologist, and your son does not need steroid cream, or "checking" of his foreskin. Your son is NORMAL! Phimosis is a trumped up way of saying, "his foreskin doesn't retract yet" which is totally normal for a boy of his age, and normal for many other boys even into adolescence - it will become retractable all by itself in its own good time without any help from anybody, except maybe your son playing with it.<br></div>
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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/yeahthat.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="yeah that">
 

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I am really glad to read this. My son was given a diagnosis of "phimosis" by a pedi urologist about 3 yrs ago when he was being seen for some urinary tract issues, that had nothing to do with him being uncircumcised. I have often wondered how would we know if he had true phimosis or not, and have been trying to figure out how to approach this. I'm glad my son's pediatrician, actually a nurse practitioner, hasn't recommended circumcision and really listens to us, but we have my son's 6 yr well check up tomorrow. It's good to refresh myself on the details and remember what I want to be firm about, just in case. Thanks for all the info everyone!
 

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There's a reason Dr. Fleiss's book What Your Doctor May Not Tell You About Circumcision (great reading for moms of intact boys) has lots of information about how to protect your intact son from ignorant medical professionals.
 
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