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my 4yo is very tired and tends to have lots of melt downs, my 6yo had asked for his hot chocolate in the blue cup, i had a greed, 4yo sobs, i empathise with 4yo, its hard that there is only 1 blue cup, you really wanted it, i can see you are very cross and sad. however, there was no way i was going to ask older ds to give younger ds the cup, as i dont think that the younger childs feelings should take precedence over the older childs, and they both really like the blue cup.<br><br>
suddenly my 60 hugs his brother and says its ok, you can have the cup i dont mind <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/happytears.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="happytears">: it was completely out of the blue and all his own idea, and i explained to my 4yo that his feelings were more important to his brother than his being able to use the cup he wanted and asked how that made him feel, he said happy, and i pointed out to my 6yo that he had just made his brother feel very happy and very loved by the consideration and kindness he had shown him.<br><br>
the 2 boys had a big hug and we went and read bedtime stories - i am sorry to bbrag - but how cool is my 6yo!!!!! my 4yo is so lucky to grow up with a big brother who is so fantastic, i feel so proud.
 

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Awww! That's so sweet!!! It's so great that they care about each other so much. I hope my DS grows up to be as kind spirited as your 6yo!
 

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Yea! It is nice to hear sweet examples. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 

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Aww, that's really sweet. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 

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Oh, I LIVE for those moments! As few & far between as they are... <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> It is so wonderful to see children decide on their own to be nice to each other!
 

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it great that your 6yo understood the 4yo's feelings and its obvouus he had sympathy for him. its great that he did that - but i hope he does not do it all the time i saw my 10 yo sister always gives our 4yo sister what ever she wants when she cries then we all feel bad for the 10 yo<br><br>
the 2 boys had a big hug and we went and read bedtime stories - i am sorry to bbrag - but how cool is my 6yo!!!!! my 4yo is so lucky to grow up with a big brother who is so fantastic, i feel so proud.[/QUOTE]
 

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Discussion Starter #8
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>utopia760</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7899190"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">it great that your 6yo understood the 4yo's feelings and its obvouus he had sympathy for him. its great that he did that - but i hope he does not do it all the time i saw my 10 yo sister always gives our 4yo sister what ever she wants when she cries then we all feel bad for the 10 yo</div>
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you are right - if it is something that my 6yo really cares about he wont part with it, or will continue to have his turn with whatever it is, i think it was largely because he genuinely wasnt as bothered as his brother about the colour of the cup.
 
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