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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hello midwives,

I have an extreme dilemma.

Please help is you can. I am really driven to be a midwife, and this year I got accepted to a really great direct-entry midwifery program and it was a dream come true.

But, I am having a family breakdown and I don't know if I will be with dp come fall. I have a 1.5 year old and I need to figure out what I can do for a living that will not stray too far away from my dreams and beliefs.

I can go to a regular bachelor's degree program in University but I could not do the midwifery program without support. Or be a midwife for that matter.

I will pursue my midwifery calling once dd is grown up. I don't mind waiting.

But I don't want to fulfill a random position in society until then because I feel so strongly for standing up for natural childbirth, breastfeeding, etc.

THANK YOU IN ADVANCE I am really at odds. All I know is I love my daughter and I want to give her a wonderful childhood and life.
 

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All I can say is that if it is meant to be, it will all work out. If you need to wait awhile, then you can do some self-study.

Are you wanting to be a CNM? If not, there are some amazing midwifery programs that wont' cost an arm and a leg - like AAMI, which is a fabulous home study course that is better than most expensive university educations!

And, re: doing a "random job" before you start apprenticing, this may just have to be what you do for your family. Maybe not. It's what all of us have done, that's for sure.
 

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Just a thought, but why not go to nursing school at University and persue midwifery from there - you would then be certified and have additional skills and experience (trauma, pediatrics, caradiac, complete system understanding - beyond healthy women and childbirth). Also, as a registered nurse, many hospitals will pay for you to complete a midwifery program, become a IBCLC and obtain and advanced degree (MSN, etc.), while getting paid as a L&D RN. All of your necessary certifications - neonatal resusitaion, advance cardiac life support will be covered and completely understood (minimum certifications necessary for all hospital L&D nurses and OBs). A CNM is also able to practice in much more diverse settings than Non-CNMs and depending on your state have prescribing privledges and advance practice skills (assist in C/Ss should your pt need one, etc.) - you can never go wrong with more education in my mind - you will have more choices and I feel, much more respect. There are many, many scholarships and financial assistance programs available to nursing students. It was one of the best decisions I ever made!

Good luck to you and your family!
 

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I knew I wanted to be a midwife since I was 16 years old and caught my first baby just before he hit the floor in a rural Jamaican hospital while I was in labour with my first.. I waited until I was in my 30's to pursue it, because I needed to raise my family first. In the meantime, I read everything I could, worked in restaurants, bartended (now THAT helped me learn how to stay up all night!), and had my own babies. I started attending homebirths of friends in my 20's, and then the midwife began asking me to come and help her.
I moved to the states in 1997, struggled as a single mother of 6 working various minimum wage jobs, began midwifery school a few years later, after I met dh. The lessons I learned from life are just as valuable as the skills I learned in midwifery school. I'm not saying that my path was the best path, but it was necessary for me, and I think going through life first was a definate plus. I'm a much wiser, compassionate, patient and accepting person now than I was in my 20's.

In the meantime, you can always teach childbirth education classes, become a La Leche League leader, doula a bit to keep in touch with the birth scene. If it's in your stars, it will happen when the time is right and the universe will support you.
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
You see, I want to do something alternative or supportive to women in childbirth without having to work in a hospital setting necessarily. I have been accepted to two other universities, one near here, for a general arts/sciences program. What could I do with that? I don't want to live off of minimum wage my whole life, not that I don't admire the women who do. I want to follow my heart and be with my baby.



Please help me
 

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the nursing degree for a single mom is not a bad idea until you can become a midwife- because you can live off the pay

the thing is that even if you could become a midwife in say 3-4 years- there is still building a practice and that usually takes some type of financing and even once you have a practice you may often need to supplement your income - just look at the how to pay the midwife thread..
there are very few midwives I know who are sole support of their family and don't have other "jobs" to make do. everything from newspaper delivery, house cleaning, health food store, tecs at the hospital, home health care... and the ones with nursing jobs
good luck
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by pamamidwife
Are you wanting to be a CNM? If not, there are some amazing midwifery programs that wont' cost an arm and a leg - like AAMI, which is a fabulous home study course that is better than most expensive university educations!
Do you have the website for AAMI? I'd like to look into it.
 

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First of all (((hugs))) to you, mama! I was where you are, trying to find my path, a few short years ago. It isn't easy and can be quite frustrating but if it is in the cards for you, you will find a way.

I want to catch babies at home. That is where my heart is. I struggled for several years trying to figure out what path to take. The truth is, both the CNM and CPM have their limitations. While I haven't completely figured out what "kind" of midwife I'm supposed to be I have decided that for now I'll pursue my nursing degree. It is so interesting learning about the body and taking care of all kinds of people. The expereince will serve me well even though I don't always agree w/ everything they want us to learn (don't even get me started w/ OB, lol!). I've learned to keep an open mind and constantly remind myself that my beliefs about birth and womens' health are very different from the medical model and that's okay. I have less than a year left until I need to decide where to go from there. Only time will tell.

ITA w/ an above poster about being involved in birth as much as you can. When I had to face the fact that the time just wasn't right for me to go to midwifery school (even though the opportunity presented itself) I became a LLL Leader, a CBE, a doula, and am now even working on becoming a doula trainer. I also do a lot of pregnancy and birth art to keep my soul connected. Just immerse yourself in birth culture however you can.

Best of luck w/ whatever comes your way!
 
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