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Not a dad <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1"> but the Dr Sears books are a good start, and his website is <a href="http://www.askdrsears.com" target="_blank">www.askdrsears.com</a> if you want to check that out.<br><br>
Also, just being open with why you do many of the things you do.... slinging, gentle parenting, breastfeeding, etc can help him understand why it is important to you.<br><br>
Good luck to you both! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 

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hi!<br>
glad to hear he wants to help raise her<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> but.. if he's like me, i wont go by just what a book says. my god.. theres SOOOOO many books out there by different psyches, therapists and such that you cant choose one. but what IVE learned is more patience than i had before, and not to have expectations of our daughter. im not much of a spiritual person, so i dont go by my "inner spirit feelings" or whatever as alot of women do. my wife reads these books and such and i feel that as long as it doesnt hurt our daughter there's no real harm. who knows? you might like a certain author of baby raising, and your bf might like someone else and you two might fight over it!<br>
more than likely he'll be a little hesitant at first of alternative parenting (breastfeeding.. well in waterbury its pretty much the minority, slingwearing,no physical disciplining.. etc.) but who knows he might warm up to it. i did.<br>
what i said earlier about expectations i meant like if shes 1yr old and she doesnt say any words yet. my mother in law and my mom BOTH are like.." why hasnt she said anything yet.. i wonder if somethings wrong" what ive learned so far is that every baby has advancements where others dont. our daughter is 1yr and 2 mos, and shes been walking since 10 mos! let alone at a year she's been putting coins in her own piggy bank by herself, and climbs alll over the place. but no words yet. one of our friends has a 11mos old and is still crawling.. but can say mom and da. i think maybe some babies lack in areas because of being rushed into things. but what do i know?<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> im not a psychologist. the key is... im learning as i go. who knows.. maybe what my wife read about not rushing to the babe every time she falls(except when she cries), not talking alot of baby talk, breastfeeding.. etc.... actually works best!! who knows?<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br>
well, keep an open mind.. but not believe everything you read, shower your daughter with hugs, and best of luck!!<br>
keep in mind.. im only a male who doesnt read those books, its just my opinion<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br>
kev
 

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I'm not a huge advocate of reading "self-help" and/or "parenting" books - but my wife has explained the basics/groundrules for raising our daughter - and I don't disagree with the premises she has presented - so we do it her way. ON the flip side... I have read some chapters out of Dr. Sears books (because my wife left them lying around - and open) and found that what he writes makes sense.
 

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instead of force-feeding a book (doctrine) to him, why not let him know what you've been doing <b>in your words</b> and let him do some reading of his own accord? if he's a grown man, i'm sure he's heard about libraries and bookstores. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1">
 
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