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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Background: Ex and I separated when DS was 4 mounts. All through pregnancy Ex changed for the worse dramatically and so DS and I moved in with my mom across the country. Fast forward to Ex and I trying it again for DS sake who is at that time 11 months old. Tried for months and months and months Ex is just way too immature, angry and not a nice person. For the last 8 eight or nine months we've all lived together (ex, me and DS) and with every day it gets harder and harder to be around Ex. He has become verbally abusive to me (as he resents the fact that I work at home, get to stay at home and more) and as a father he is fair at best. He did not want to see DS open his birthday presents and even on his days off we see him as much as the days he works. I feel like I am in a bad situation. I would leave tomorrow except I don't have enough income to support myself and DS. I know that a small apartment is in DS and mine future but it is still hard getting there. I have all of these irons in the fire and I'm trying to enjoy my spending what time I can with my son but life is really becoming really hard. I thought that good energy my way might help the situation getting happy sooner.<br><br>
Today is especially hard because Ex barked at me yesterday about the fact that DS knocked over a tea pitcher and then slipped in the tea. I of course was there in a matter of a second comforting DS and confirming that he was all right (which he was, he only cried for about thirty seconds) I asked Ex if he would get me a towel please and he lost it. He gave me the silent treatment, threw the towel into the puddle and then started cleaning up the tea but was clearly angry. I told him calmly I didn't mind cleaning up the mess. Then he cleans it all up, throws the wet down onto the bathroom floor and goes into his office where he slams the door. I mean I feel like I am talking about a child here but no an adult. So I ask him if he is mad and why and he says nothing.<br><br>
Then the next time he talks to me it is the this morning and he acts like everything is fine. WTH is wrong with him. This kind of stuff happens all the time. I am really toning this story down to save time but anyway so I convince him to tell me why he is mad. After about 30 minutes I realize he gets angry out of fear. His initial concern for DS being okay sent him into a rage and he took it out on me. Saying he was mad that I didn't stop DS, who was out of my sight for maybe 3 seconds. This coming from the guy who won't watch DS for more than fifteen minutes and gets irritated if I ask him to keep an eye on DS so I can take out the trash or run to the laundry room for 5 minutes.<br><br>
In two in half hours we are going to his family's to celebrate DS's b-day with them. He has not told them that we are not together and the fact that he doesn't want me to talk to him and just to be ready at five I know it is going to be awkward. I've been crying off and on all day. I just really don't want to be treated like crap everyday. I just really want to get that financial security and be done with this living situation. Thanks for reading this felt really good getting out. Again I was just hoping for some good vibes for DS and me. Thank.
 

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I'm having a pretty crappy day myself. Let's share a hug with each other. Here it is:<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Momtwice</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/11536152"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I'm having a pretty crappy day myself. Let's share a hug with each other. Here it is:<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"></div>
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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/hug2.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Hug2"><br><br>
I've had bad days too.
 

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Sending hugs ...<br><br>
I will say a prayer for your decision making process. These things are really hard to sort out and move on.<br><br>
M
 

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There are many, many factors in your life that I have no idea about, so it's hard for me to comment fairly, but it sounds like it's not worth it to me! That and your thread title make me think you already know the answer to the decision at hand. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> Good luck, mama.
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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It seems he needs counseling, at minimum. But only HE can make himself do that, so yes, it seems that leaving is currently your best choice! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> !!!!
 
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