[cagnew]

I figured we had enough babies here to start this

I'm 3 days out and, as always, a mess. Weepy, emotional, all over the charts.

Breastfeeding is going badly and I am so disappointed and frustrated. I was really hoping it would be different this time. The babies lower jaw is recessed like my last babies (although his lips are normal... just thin) and I am guessing that is the cause of the pain and slowly evolving nipple damage. His latch looks right on the outside, but it's hurting pretty badly when he eats. Every now and then I get a good feeding where it doesn't hurt as much, but that's few and far between. And he fights me! Ugh. It's just miserable.

He is ORANGE even though his bili numbers weren't too high (8.7). Trying to keep him near a window from time to time.

 

[knittygritty]

:hug: Sorry to hear you're having trouble breastfeeding, cagnew. Is it possible he has a tongue tie?

 

[Valerie11]

cagnew, I found out when I went to get the free breastpump that my insurance now covers lactation consultants (part of the ACA/Obamacare). I have never used one, but if I had problems that lasted for more than a day or so, I wouldn't hesitate to consult with one. Maybe that could help you figure out if there's something simple that you could change to make it work better. I know my boys are never as good at latching as my girl was, but it's just all babies are different.

 

[cagnew]

I met with three different LC at the hospital and they were helpful. They checked for tongue tie and said he was fine. Maybe I just need to be pickier about his latch since i know he is capable of getting a good one. I just fed him just now and it hardly hurt at all.... I hate the football hold and that is what I was trying to do per the LC advice, but this last time I did cross-cradle and re-latched him twice (ouch!) and seemed to find the magic spot. Hope I can find it again!

 

[gabeyho]

I am so sorry you are having trouble with nursing. I would definitely consult a lactation consultant or, if you have a group in your area, La Leche League is also really helpful and the leaders are there for you. Are you making sure you are getting his mouth open really wide and putting the nipple all the way in his mouth? I'm sure you know that, but it's always the first mistake I make at the beginning and what causes me the most pain.

 

[Metasequoia]

@cagnew, I'm popping in from July - congrats on your beautiful baby! :love

I wanted to mention that tongue tie/lip tie can often be overlooked, even by LCs and pediatricians. There's a FB support group with lots of photos - and you can post a photo of your baby's tongue (underneath) and lip for opinions. There are often doctors who respond on the page. You can also ask for recommendations in your area:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/tonguetiebabies/

Hugs, mama. :hug

 

[luckiest]

Dr Kotlow is kind of "the" tongue/lip tie expert, and his office will analyze a photo for free. Posterior ties are easy to miss, but also hard to correct if that's what it is.

I hope it's all just the newborn learning curve and that it resolves soon!


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[cowchick530]

Breastfeeding my son was a nightmare for the first month. Cracked bleeding nipples. Found out my breast tissue is just to dense for newborns to pull out enough to get a proper latch. I have to use a nipple shouldfor the first month or two . Maybe give a nipple shield a shot. I know they aren't ideal. I was super hesitant this time around but once I started getting sores on my nipples from poor latch I gave in. Giving her my milk iswwhat'sbest . Even if I have to get it to her in ways I'm not fond of. And its only for a bit. And hey getting told my boobs are just to firm isn't a bad thing. Considering I'm a very full D cup and have already fed a baby for a year with them. Haha

 

[cagnew]

cowchick: I'm sorry to hear about the first month! It's so hard, isn't it? I would use a breastshield if I had to, because breastmilk is better than any other option. I've had a couple good latches today, so I have hope. My mom suggested that maybe his jaundice is making him sleepy and he is being lazy.

Anyone else feel apprehensive about the first BM? My stomach is so gassy and crampy and I know it's trying to get things moving. Last time I somehow ended up with an anal fissure that SUCKED. Haha.

Despite all the issues, I am glad he is here

 

[cowchick530]

I was talking about when I had my son. My daughter is only 10 days new and This time breastfeeding is so much easier. Although its still not easy if that makes sense. And yes sleepy babies have a lazy latch, that may be whats going on.

As for the first BM. I was terrified. But not as terrified as I was after my first baby.. I had a 3rd degree tear the first time. This time I had a 2nd degree tear. So I was a little less fearful. im also on stool softeners so that helps.

 

[boscopup]

We had jaundice here too. I came close to leaving the hospital AMA over it. She was 12.2 at discharge, but my milk hadn't come in yet, so I expected her to be jaundiced. She was acting normal - not lethargic. Finally convinced them to discharge us. Then Sarah's doctor wanted us to get tested again Monday, which got pushed to Tuesday. It was 13.6, so higher than Saturday at discharge. So she had us do another test Thursday. This time it was 11. So I'm sure it peaked between Saturday and Tuesday, then came down. No more tests needed. I was never concerned, as my other 37 weekers had jaundice that went away with sun and nursing. Same went for this one.

We had our first weight check today... At birth, she was 7 lbs even. At discharge, she was 6 lbs 8 oz. Today at 11 days old, she was 7 lbs 6oz! She's obviously getting plenty of milk.

I'm doing better in the weepy department. Last week, I was crying over everything. One night, I got in bed and just started crying. My husband came in, and I told him I was crying for no reason. Deposit, I couldn't think of anything that I was crying about. My body just need to cry. This week has been better so far. I've cried a couple little times, but that's it. Gotta love postpartum hormones!

 

[DuchessTergie]

Breastfeeding is no easy task. DD1 was so voracious we called her Breast Wolf because she'd let out a growl as she latched and she'd kick the nursing cover around. DD2 started well, then went through a scary nursing strike. I had to pump to keep myself engorged or she just wouldn't nurse. She wouldn't take expressed milk and I literally had hundreds of bags to donate. I'm carefully watching DS because I have learned the baby is an equal contributor to the nursing relationship. My hope is he is in the middle of his sisters' extremes. And I'd like to donate a little milk this time, too.

 

[forestlover75]

@cagnew, still preggo here but dropping in to see how you postpartum ladies are doing. So sorry breastfeeding is hurting so bad.

I wonder if there is a well recommended lactation consultant you can reach out to in your area? I have had hit and miss luck referring to hospital or la Leche for this stuff. It's a vulnerable time and you need someone who is very good at what they do, and sensitive to you.

First, The fact that you have had a few good latches is a VERY good sign. Let that reassure you, and (hard as it is) don't just let it go when the latch is painful. Deep breaths, remember baby's learning and can do this (just like you did birth). Take him off and start again, nose to nipple, bringing his body in as he opens wide. Avoid pushing his head, I find this can create resistance and a tendency in infants to clamp down and pull back on the nipple (ouch).

If you need to pump a couple minutes before feedings so there's let down, that sometimes helps a frustrated, hungry, sleepy baby and can make the feeding more efficient. Also, you can use a little dropper to offer some pumped milk and ensure he's getting some nourishment, as a poor latch can result in less milk, and a sleepier baby who doesn't latch as well, who is initially fussy, then sleepy. Sometimes droppering some milk on your breast so it rolls down to your nipple can help baby get motivated.

I caution the use of breast shields , which are really only indicated in cases of flat or inverted nipples. They reduce milk production and can lead to the same issues as nipple confusion, which can lead to additional problems down the road. If you have serious damage, they can be used very short term , with a plan for how you will stop using them, how you will increase production and how baby will get additional milk.

I hope this is in some way helpful and not overwhelming at such a challenging time. Wish I lived close so I could offer you hands on support. And I hope you can get someone in there who can offer you some help. Hang in there! Hugs


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[DuchessTergie]

So, let's hear it: what do you LOVE about your postpartum body? What are you surprised by?

I love my boobs. This is the only time they'll be over an A cup.

I'm a weirdo-- I love seeing my belly shrink. I think it is awesome how we slowly expand over 9ish months and rapidly shrink back. I'm not ashamed of this jelly belly phase.

I'm surprised that I still move like I'm pregnant, as in I assume I can't pick anything up off the floor. And I'm nervous to lay flat on my back or stomach.

 

[sarahknavy]

I like wearing regular clothes and not worrying about it pushing my bladder... and laying on my back.

I hate my boobs. One is rocky and the other one is just sore. The sheer unevenness is always annoying. Stupid super boob!

 

[cagnew]

Super boob! Lol! I have a lumpy boob and I hate it. The OB has never seen anything like it but assumed it's just dilated milk ducts or something. My areola looks like it has small grapes underneath it.

Love about pp body... nothing yet. IN a week or two, when things start to normalize, I will be thrilled! Right now, I feel crummy and sore and like everything in my tummy is all out of order.

As far as breastfeeding is going... I have enacted the same survival plan I had with my last. I'm nursing half the time and pumping the other half (and giving him the milk in a bottle). I am pretty sure that once my milk comes in fully (it started today) things will improve. As of now, my breasts are hard and full but not a whole lot is coming out. Because they are so big and my nipples so small, it's hard for him to latch. He starts to attempt a latch and then he gets pissed when nothing comes out right away. He's kind of been on a nursing strike. I fed him a bottle of pumped milk this morning and drank it up and fell asleep, nice and relaxed. This after a horrible night of screaming and crying and gas.

I expect my milk will fully let down tomorrow. I will pump to soften it up and then latch him. Hopefully, we will be able to get down to some serious business working on things.

Today was a "wet day" as someone called it another thread. Lots of crying on my part. I've got a bad case of the baby blues this time around. DH goes back to work on Thursday and I'll be on my own with the 5 kids.... I just feel overwhelmed.

Physically, I feel pretty bad. I think I'm doing too much. My crotch has that falling out feeling. I've had a gas pain in my side for two days and other discomfort in my lower abdomen. I haven't pooped yet, so that might be what's going on. Sent DH to the store this evening for prune juice and stool softeners.

On a more positive note- the baby totally flashed us a coupe smiles last night! I know they say it's only gas, but he didn't pass any (at that time) and it was a huge grin! I don't care what the reason for it! My heart melted!!!! All this awful postpartum stuff is so worth it.

 

[cagnew]

@forestlover75 I am not a fan of breastshields at all. I know there is a time and place for them, but they have not been good to me. With my first baby, I was having a hard time and I asked a nurse for help. She told me I had flat nipples and gave me a shield. I struggled with that thing for a few days and gave up. It was messy, it always fell off, and it hurt. The baby wouldn't latch onto me at all after the shield was introduced. In the end, I gave up breastfeeding altogether.

I tried a shield again with my last baby and that lasted about a day, lol. My areolas are really big and my nipples are small, and this combo makes the shield hard to use.

That being said, I know people who have used them for a short time and found them to be a big help.

 

[Valerie11]

@cagnew, I would try an enema if I were in your position. I remember kind of freaking out after my last child because I hadn't gone for a few days and that helped a lot. I think that was the first one I ever used. Didn't even know about them with the first two kids. Now I feel this great relief that enemas are always there as an option as long as you don't use them for normal BMs, just for when it starts to stress you out that you're not going.

 

[cowchick530]

Yep. Boobs are great!!! Haha. My tummy shrank fast. But of course it's still like a waterbed.

I'm most surprised by how much I don't really care about my body being won't this time around. I know I'm able to lose the weight. So its not even something I really think about. Which is nice! I stressed over it last time...

Still a bit weepy. Not to to bad. I'mso sentimental that its easy for someone to say something and me start crying . For instance my nurses from the hospital sent me a card and said some very nice things.. It made me cry.

 

[cagnew]

@Valerie11 Yeah, I am definitely considering the enema route. I have a couple in my bathroom Just have to build up the courage to use one :laugh: