[goldenpigmom]

I need some input on whether my feelings on this are valid...We don't usually go to playgroups in peoples homes so my experience here is limited.

Recently we hosted a playgroup. One of the moms took her DD to the bathroom and when they came out, she told me Kid used the potty. I said, Great, because I know they've taken a hands-off approach to toilet learning and so it was good that Kid used the potty. Only later did I start to wonder, why did she tell me this? I thought, I wonder - no surely not - did she tell me because she left it for me to clean up??? And in fact, that is what she did. She left the pee in the potty for me to clean up.

Am I wrong in being unhappy about this? I'm sure it was her - no one else went after them and my DD doesn't go by herself yet. If the situation was reversed, not only would I have emptied the pee, but I would have made sure the potty was sanitized (yes I know urine is sterile, but still).

Thanks for your input!

 

[Lily's_Mom]

Maybe she's not sure how to deal with cleaning a potty? Obviously you empty the goods into the toilet, but before potty-training with dd, I didn't know how exactly you rinse/clean the pot.

If that's what's going on with her, she should forgo the potty, and sit her kid on the big potty. That's what we always did; even if someone had a potty, just help balance dd on the toilet seat and not have to worry about cleaning a potty!

ETA: And yes, I would not be pleased about dealing with another kid's excrement in our potty.

 

[ShyDaisi]

I don't think this is appropriate at all....She should have cleaned it, or asked what you wanted her to do with it, SOMEthing other than leave it for you to take care of. She could have at least dumped it in the toilet, then told you so you could know it wasn't sanitized.

 

[crunchymamatobe]

Absolutely not appropriate. She should have asked you how to clean it if she wasn't sure.

 

[AkRotts]

Yuck!!! I would NOT be happy about that at all!!

I would never leave something like that for someone else to clean up. How rude!

:

 

[ani'smommy]

No, not appropriate. And urine is not sterile after it's been sitting around in a potty chair for a few hours!

Someone at my house (they were over for somoene else's shower, so I didn't know them) put a disposable diaper in the diaper pail with my cloth ones! I'm glad I found it before putting it in the wash. Ugh.

 

[GardenStream]

That seems kind of strange to me. I don't have a clue why anyone would leave that and not dump it in the toilet themselves. It's not something I would be angry about, but I would find it odd. I also would make sure she knew that she could just dump it in the toilet and rinse it out next time.

 

[RoundAbout]

Very rude! At a minimum she should have dumped it! It's one thing if the kid just went on their own but the mom was right there. Wow.

In the future I would probably remove the potty chair unless they ask. That way they have to use the big potty.

 

[pandora665]

I would dump the pee and wash it out with soap - then I would tell mom what we did (in case she wanted to actually sterilize it or something.) If DD pooped in the potty, same thing (maybe more soap), although I'd ask about sterilizing it myself. Common courtesy.

I know a lot of people, though, who would dump the pee/poop without washing, even at someone else's house. I find even that to be gross, much less leaving the pee for you to deal with. Good luck!

 

[Peony]

Yuck, she should of cleaned it.

 

[momasana]

Ew.

That's kind of like the equivalent of an adult going the bathroom and not flushing. Gross.

If she comes over again and they use the potty, just say "Here are the bleach wipes so you can clean the potty after you dump it out" or something like that.

 

[Breeder]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ani'smommy Someone at my house (they were over for somoene else's shower, so I didn't know them) put a disposable diaper in the diaper pail with my cloth ones! I'm glad I found it before putting it in the wash. Ugh.

GROSS.

Also I would never leave my kids urine or feces just sitting in a potty. That is just rude.

 

[Limabean1975]

Woah! I have become close friends with my playgroup moms...and I would not use their potty let alone not clean it! I put DS on the big toilet when at other people's houses. Now, I understand it may have been a spontaneous moment, child asked to use the little potty and mom wanted to take advantage of the learning opportunity...okay, fine, but she shouls have emptied & cleaned it, and if she was not sure how, she should have asked you.

I don't think you should really say anything to her about it at this point, though.

 

[readytobedone]

Quote:

Originally Posted by CrunchyMamaToBe Absolutely not appropriate. She should have asked you how to clean it if she wasn't sure.

yup. i've had people's kids use DD's little baby bjorn potty, but they parents always dumped it/cleaned it. it's not rocket science, after all!

 

[peaceful_mama]

ICK!

What I would've done is dumped it, rinsed it, and told the mom so that if she wanted to, she could clean/sterilize it more.

absolutely NO WAY would I have left the pee to be dumped!

And about the sposie in the cloth diaper pail---this is why I specifically wrote on the lids to my 2 dipe pails (one of which actually *is* a trash can cause the lidded trash can was cheaper) "CLOTH DIAPERS. NOT TRASH" I figured there would probably be a day where someone who did not know would come over....

 

[prothyraia]

That's....ridiculous.

 

[Ellp]

Nope, not nice!
When we go to play with friends I have Dd use their big potty. Somehow a kid's potty is their "own", yk? And even if Dd wanted to take advantage of a "new" to her potty, I'd definately clean it out and tell the host/hostess that it was used and cleaned out by me. Therefore if they wanted to clean some more later, they can.

Thats just rude!

 

[miss_nikki]

I agree that's pretty rude. I also agree with pp who suggested putting the potty away during playgroups.

I can't imagine walking out of someone's bathroom knowing I left something like that for them to clean up.

 

[amandaleigh37]

Hmm... definitely strange! At the very least, she should have emptied it into the big potty, flushed, gave it a rinse, and then asked you if you had any other cleaning/sanitizing that should be done. That would have been the polite thing to do, IMO.

Is it possible that she doesn't use a child's potty seat at home & didn't know how to take it apart to empty it? I know ours can be tricky, and if someone's never done it I guess there could be some confusion... but I would think she would ask you, unless she was embarassed? I dunno. Strange!

 

[AndVeeGeeMakes3]

The ONLY thing I can imagine that MIGHT be a reason is if they are a no-flush family.

Still, if YOU'RE a flushing family (as would be evidenced by the lack pee in the pot!) I'd think she'd choose graciousness over "activism" (or, in this case inactivism

). I hate to say it, but I have definitely known some people who would try to force exactly this belief on others.