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PPD or just normal hormonalwomanness?

459 Views 3 Replies 3 Participants Last post by  abba
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About a month ago I saw my doc about what we both felt was ppd- crying at the drop of a hat, just feeling like I wasn't doing anything right, feeling like something is gonna happen to dd, feeling like I was just a couch cow (sitting and nursing all the time), etc...

My dd was also diagnosed with reflux around that time and is on Zantac and for the most part has been alot easier to live with (KWIM?) and I work from home, and all of that had ramped down over the course of the past month as well, both things seem to have helped.. BUT.. I have noticed that I have been just absolutely super-mega frusterated at everything, the (BLEEP) dog, and more so lately, I am getting really frusterated at dh, it feels like this festering "thing" just making me angry, KWIM??? I still have the feeling that something bad is going to happen to dd or something is wrong with her when she cries, and like someone else mentioned, I check on her when she is sleeping to be sure she is still breathing, too.

My work is going to pick up again this next week, and I am supposed to go back to my doc on Thu... She referred me to a few counselors, but I never went because they were not on my insurance and the ones on my ins were all either men (how could they know about ppd?!?) or across town an hour, and I just didn't feel like "talking" to someone would make me feel any different. I know that ppd can be worsened by stress and I know once my work picks back up again, I will be under alot of stress, since I HAVE to work, and it involves talking to people on the phone, and my dd naps very erratically still....rambling.. doh!
ANYHOW... What I was getting at was, is this sort of thing truly ppd or just hormonalness? I am not against Zoloft if it will help, but if its just hormones?!What to do...
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Talking to someone was REALLY helpful for me. It's hard to explain why-- it's kind of like, when you're feeling that depressed, the reasonable part of your brain is MIA, and this lady therapist I talked to was like a grounding voice when my own wasn't there. Talking to her, remembering to eat enough protein and healthy fats, and also doing my cod liver oil and amino acid supplementation are what worked for me. I had been on Effexor (you can read about that under the recent Effexor thread) but when I switched from the Effexor to the amino acids, that's when the healing finally started.

BTW, my therapist was like 50 minutes away, but it was so worth it! I hope you find something that works for you! Hang in there mama! This time in your life WILL pass and soon it will just be another experience you can draw from to help others who will pass this way . . .
Oh, I forgot to answer the original question.
I don't think there is just PPD and no PPD, there are shades of gray . . . when I was getting PPD I kept telling myself "I just had a bad day, tomorrow will be better . . . . next week will be better . . ." and then eventually I realized that they were pretty much ALL bad days . . . and even the things I usually found joy in didn't lift my spirits. Hope that helps answer your question.

OH, and another thing-- a book that I didn't have then but I have now and I LOVE is called "Feelings Buried Alive Never Die." It's about how the negative energy of unresolved feelings can literally make us sick and poison our lives-- and how to resolve those feelings, simply, without needing to see a therapist or plodding through painful memories . . . it is fantastic, you can get it on Amazon.com.
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It's been 3 1/2 years since I had my second...and I am so utterly frustrated with all. I fester at my husband, who is not always attentive with the children (and definitely not attentive with me), I am always the one waking at night for my 3 1/2 year old who just can't sleep through (has to go potty), I cannot seem to enjoy staying at home with them. I am defensive and down with all.

I exercise regularly, take multivites, try to eat well, except for the occasional carbs. I am probably in the best shape of my life. Just not happy.

My body doesn't take well with medicines. I have been so against taking anti-depressants, the Pill (I practice the Natural Family Planning Method)...but now, I don't know. I am feeling quite helpless lately.

Just venting. Sorry to be all about myself. I need to let it out anonymously.
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