[Flower of Bliss]

What did you do to prepare for the second baby?

What did you wish you did to prepare for the second baby?

I'm due in August with baby #2. DD will turn 3 that month. I'll be home with both of them full time. I'm looking for advice from moms that have BTDT. My big to do's before baby arrives include decluttering and organizing closets, bathroom cabinets, and our study to eliminate all of the wasted time on "where did I put this?" "Where should I put this?" "Do we have this?" etc. I figure if I start with things organized, it will be easier to keep up with everything.

I'll have DH home for about 2 weeks and then my mom here for about a week. I expect I'll have some meals dropped off from friends in the early weeks - we usually organize that with new babies.

What should I be doing to prepare my house, myself, my DD, my DH, etc for the transition? DH is already a wonderfully involved daddy. He regularly does meal prep, kitchen cleaning, pet duties, diaper laundry, etc generally with DD "helping" the whole time. I have no worries about him being a VERY VERY involved and active dad and partner when he's around (7pm through 6am on weekdays and weekends). However, his commute is a solid hour or more each way and so when he's gone, I'm very much on my own. I have a pretty good network of SAHMs in the area that I'm friends with, but we don't have local grandmothers etc.

I'm not too worried about the transition. DD is beyond thrilled about her coming sister. I just don't want to be kicking myself saying "I wish I'd done..." before the baby was born.

 

[Barefoot~Baker]

Hey there, congratulations on your new one on the way

I have to say that all of the things that I wished I had done, you are already doing!

My biggest regret was not recruiting more help. My 1st was 21 months when my 2nd was born, and she was raging through her terrible twos so I was really stressed out. I had little to no help, my dh was home but he is so oblivious to my needs a lot of the time and just didn't get it, and my mom was not helpful at all. I was pretty isolated at the time so I was run pretty ragged.

At 3 years, your first is probably going to be a little helper herself!

 

[sunflowergirll]

I am also going from 1 to 2 with no family nearby to help. Hubby will be around more than yours, but my DD is very "mommy centered" and I am a little worried about how it will go.

We hired a mother's helper 2-3 afternoons a week. She's a high school daughter of a friend of my hairdresser. She came over yesterday and the two played quite nicely.

I made it clear I"m going to need help with light housework/laundry/food shopping, playing with DD and holding the baby. She seems on board with that.

I think it'll really help me. Perhaps I might be able to nap, or at the very least, get supper on the table.

 

[Alyantavid]

We talked about it a ton with our oldest son, who was 4 when his brother was born. I arranged to have him spend a few hours a few times a week at daycare with his friends and his normal activities.

I didn't do much house prep, other than making sure I had all the baby stuff I needed. We all adjusted pretty well, but I did forget how much time you spend nursing a newborn. That was the hardest for me.

 

[acupuncturemomma]

: subbing 'cause I'm right there with you!

 

[Learning_Mum]

We got a crock pot, and that was fantastic. Prep took about five minutes (I never bothered with browning meat) and it would be hot and ready for when DH got home. With DS1 we ate takeaways for the first month.

I got movies for DS1 that he would watch while I tried to get the baby to sleep. He watched alot of movies, but on the upside, watches hardly any now, so it is temporary!

I also told DS1 how hard it would be when the baby came home. How all they did was cry, and poo, and I'd be tired and grumpy and busy. My theory was: prepare him for the worst and it won't be as bad. It worked too. He was prepared for when I was tired and busy and not up for playing much, but it was much better than I made it sound so he was happy!

DH also needs to be prepared to halve everything with the kids for a while. DH and I basically had a child each for the first while. So I would care for DS2 and he would care for DS1, that way it seemed more manageable.

Oh, and remembering about settling babies! DS1 was sleeping through the night and everything when DS2 was born, and even if he did wake it was just a matter of tucking him in. It was a huge shock to actually have to spend half an hour or an hour feeding a baby, and then actually having to get them back to sleep!! That was the hardest, I forgot what it was like!

 

[Barefoot~Baker]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Learning_Mum We got a crock pot, and that was fantastic. Prep took about five minutes (I never bothered with browning meat) and it would be hot and ready for when DH got home. With DS1 we ate takeaways for the first month. I got movies for DS1 that he would watch while I tried to get the baby to sleep. He watched alot of movies, but on the upside, watches hardly any now, so it is temporary!

The crockpot is such a good idea! I had one with my 2nd, but when we moved I put it in the garage bc I wasn't using it much, and now I can't find it

: I really want to find it before #3 is born!

I had a lot of dvds for dd1 and I felt so guilty sometimes, but you're right, she reached a point where she could entertain herself a lot more and she doesn't watch tv as much anymore. Sesame street is great, she loved learning her abc's and number's, so it isn't all bad

 

[greenmamapagan]

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[Flower of Bliss]

Thanks for all of the ideas mamas

Keep them coming.

 

[ani'smommy]

My advice: Savor those last few months with your older DD. We had a really rough time of it after DS was born and I only regret not spending more one on one time with DD.

 

[Limabean1975]

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