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<p>Any suggestions from you Moms who have been there?  The transition from being a Mom of an only child to being the Mom to more than one is a bit daunting for me!</p>
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<p>I think a lot of it is that DS still needs me.  Lots.  And he's clear about that.  He's only two, and has absolutely no idea why he can't launch himself onto Mommy's stomach anymore. We're reading lots of books about new babies - We Have A Baby is a favorite! - but I am sure that he doesn't "get it" at all.  He gets really upset when I hold the cats, or a puppy (sidebar: ohmygosh my friend got a puppy and it must be the hormone blend but I can't get enough of it), and goes, "Mommy!  MOMMY!" until I put it down.  I've been trying to show him, using the cat/puppy/whatever, that I can still hug and love him while I love something else, that there's plenty of Mommy love to go around, but I'm concerned about his transitioning.</p>
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<p>And then there's the issue of, "Oh my, how am I going to DO this?  What's it going to be like for me to have another child?"  This baby is earlier than we'd expected - a surprise, but a great one! - and I was so totally not thinking that I'd be having two kids in such short succession.  I'm also an only child, so don't have the example of my mom having a relationship with me and siblings.</p>
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<p>Anyone have any tips on how you made the transition easier?  Anyone have any words of encouragement that it's going to be okay?  What was becoming a Mom of two (or more!) like for you?</p>
 

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<p>no lie, the early days are tough, but so are the early days of having only one! My daughter was 2.5 when her sister was born and the first half of the first year was a little daunting with all the constant care a new baby needs on top of the never ending needs of a toddler. I found that things drastically got better as the new little one gained independence (sat up, crawled, walked) and after the first year it all just flew on by and seemed like nothing to me, just doing things that need to be done as if it had always been that way. Now the two are inseparable and I'm both are excited about their new sibling. This time my older daughter "gets it" (she's 5.5) and our three year old is almost as clueless as her sister was... she knows but the actual happenings and concept is certainly beyond her. I'm not so worried about her this time though because she has her sister to be with as I have to do the round the clock baby care again.</p>
 

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<p>My oldest was 22 months old when her sister was born. The hardest part was the recovery for me. DD2 was in the NICU for a week and it was hard for DD1 to understand why the baby wasn't coming home. Once she came by to visit me at the hospital and laid in the middle of the parking lot sceaming she wasn't going to leave without her sister.. It was so sad. I was lucky DH was able to take leave on top of his paternity time so he was off for 21 days (instead of 10) so I had someone to help me out at the beginning. The first week of him being back was a bit rough but we adjusted pretty quickly.. A few things I think might have helped:</p>
<p>Even though I was tired I tried to make sure I did some special things with DD1. This was hard for me because I really don't like to put the baby down when they are small but DD1 really needed that one on one time with me.</p>
<p>Babywearing is great! I was able to do a lot of what we did before just added DD2 to it. Specially good for getting everyone outside time..</p>
<p>I made a point of telling DD1 that she couldn't get upset or try to push her sister out of my lap that babies need a lot of love/cuddles to grow. I made sure I had some lap space open for her as well. The first week was the hardest because she loved/loves to sit on my lap and get read to but didn't want her sister there too. After the first week of being home she adjusted to sharing my lap..</p>
<p>By 2 weeks at home I couldn't put DD2 down though because DD1 would try to pick her up and take her places. I went to the bathroom once and came back to no baby.. Scared me half to death, found them under DD1's bed with DD1 "reading" her a book.. Lesson learned, no putting her down without distracting DD1 at the same time. By 2 months DD2 smiled whenever she saw DD1.. By 4 DD1 was trying to play with her sister whenever she got a chance.. Now they are best friends, where ever one is the other is.. oh and they are co-conspirators in causing as much trouble as they can manage and driving me batty.. <span><img alt="ROTFLMAO.gif" src="http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/ROTFLMAO.gif">Today they managed to get into the flour while I was using the bathroom, yesterday they drew a "pretty picture mommy" on my journal while I was cleaning the kitchen.. Yea, they are a handful.</span></p>
 

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<p>My first was 21 months when my second was born.</p>
<p>He adjusted pretty well, we read the books to him beforehand although he didn't really "get it".</p>
<p>He was interested but not super jealous and he had stopped nursing about 2 months prior and was no longer interested in that at all so that helped.  I often wonder if it's easier when a child is younger rather than let's say 2.5 or 3 yo? </p>
<p>They each at that time had their own bedroom, I set up a basket of toys and books that were only played with in that room, while I nursed his brother.  We would come up and we'd read or play.  My second spent a lot of time nursing and I was blessed with a very easy (but always hungry) newborn.  The big problem we had was my son and not sleeping in his bed anymore.  He had been sleeping in his crib for almost 8 months or so, but once #2 was born, that went out the window.  After a few months of dragging him back to his bed a few times a night we gave in and they both slept with us until very recently.  I'm still having issues with my oldest and sleeping in his bed now.  The idea of 5 of us in one bed doesn't seem to appealing to me, and whenever both boys make their way back to bed (like last night) I'm destined to sleep about 45 minutes if I'm lucky. </p>
<p>I also tried to make sure my oldest knew he was first, sort of like "let's get finn dressed and then we'll get sam dressed".  I didn't always rush to the newborn, let's say I was making finn lunch and my newborn was crying, he could wait 2 minutes while I prepared something for finn to eat.  I can imagine how frustrating it would be to suddenly be always last in everything, so I made sure my oldest was top in the pecking order at times.  It's not like a 3 week old would know the difference (as long as he's safe wherever he is).  We also played the "You're the big brother so you get to go do XYZ while sam stays home".  We still do this from time to time.  I'm an only child too so this was all new to me, as is my husband so we just tried to think, how would we feel? </p>
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