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I find myself in an ironic situation. When reluctantly enrolling ds in preschool, I was careful to seek one out that was non-punitive. I didn't want him in an atmosphere of time outs or anything else like that.

Well, I am worried now that his teachers are too lax about hitting/pushing. For instance, I was there the other day picking him up. One of the teachers was standing next to me, I turned to talk to her, and all of a sudden heard ds start crying. I turned around, and he told me that the other kid who just walked by (known for being aggressive) had pushed him. The teacher asked the kid, the kid admitted it, and the teacher said "make sure to go check on him" and then went back to what she was doing. There was no talking about how that was unacceptable, wrong, or anything else. And I have witnessed things like this before. I feel like ds is left with the impression that what the kid did was not big deal.

I mean, I have also seen them sometimes address the situation appropriately, but I feel like overall they are not 'strict' enough about no hitting or pushing. I understand this is considered normal behavior, but we have a zero tolerance in our house for this kind of thing. Ds has never been one to hit or push, and now he is starting to do it. And by the things he is doing, I can tell he is mimicking some of the other kids in his class.

I'm thinking about talking with the teachers after winter break, but what do I say exactly? That I want them to take hitting/pushing more seriously? Am I just being oversensitive?
 

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Rather than expecting the teachers to be more serious about the hitting, it's more proactive that you be....by taking him out of the preschool. That's what I would do. Sounds like his time there is doing more harm than good. There's nothing that place, or any really, can offer him that you can't top even on a bad day. Good luck!
 

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I think it is really important for you to talk to the teachers and/or director any time you see something that concerns you. In this case, you might start by asking what the policy is on dealing with physical agressiveness between children. They should definitely have one. Then you can figure out if what you saw was unusual or not. If you don't like the policy, then you can talk to the director about doing more to help the kids understand what is and isn't acceptable. If what you saw was an unmotivated teacher, then you can talk to the teacher about being more attentive.

Good luck.
 
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