[sadie_sabot]

My 26 month old dd will occassionally push one of her pals. Usually, the other kid is in her space, and the pushing is related to that. I have been workring on talking with her about how we don't push, pushing hurts, etc, and teaching her to say "I need some space" and when that doesn't work, saying "No! Back off!" and then trying to get help from an adult.

My thing is, though, I actually think that if someone is crowding her and using her words doesn't work, I want her to eventually be able to physically defend her self and her space. so I don't actually want to teach her to never ever push.

the prtoblem is, right now it's an issue with other similarly aged kids who maybe don't get that she's telling them to get out of her space, and I don't want to in any way be understood (by her or anyone else!) to be advocating that she push her buddies.

Any thoughts?

 

[lilyka]

My chidlren are the crowders. I am the one always craving personal space. So i can kinda see this from both sides. I can really understand the primal feeling of wanting to push someone out of my way to get space. I can't breath if someone is too close to my face.

So what to do . . .hmmm. . . . well as the parent of a crowder feel free to step in move my child back or ask her to move back, let go, stop squeezing, stop kissing whatever. Really we are all in this together helping our children learn socially acceptable ways to express thier love. For some love is best expressed with space LOL

. And as far as dd not pushing, I have trouble thinking this is terrible if she asks someone to give her some room and they don't. enough already you were warned. But can't have pushing. So until she is better at communicating just really watch social interaction and be ready to intervene and help her get the space she needs even if it means screaming for a grown up (I am picturing my 2 year old mauling her cousin as he looks out panic stricken

poor little guy.)