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Discussion Starter #1
Okay many of you have read that I am having a difficult time with a very difficult child. Many of you suggested that I need to supervise more (dd did some stuff in the bathroom this morning). So I have supervised her better. I make her go from room to room with me. Normally I would leave her playing with blocks or whatever while pouring a coffee in the next room. NOT anymore! And she has went to the bathroom twice since the incident this morning. (Since I was in the next room with her sister this morning I have decided I actually have to stay in the washroom with her.) She has asked me to leave, I just told her that I can't trust her to only go to the washroom and when she is older she can. At what age should I supervise her every move? When I can I trust her to leave a room for a minute or two? (I was, but apparently I shouldn't have!) I really need support. I feel like I ruined her.
 

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Supervising doesn't have to be punishment. If she wants you out of the bathroom, could you hang out in the hall while she uses the toilet? Maybe sing a song. Any way to make this fun for both of you?
 

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Discussion Starter #3
I was just in the next room, giving her privacy when this mornings incident happened. So I told her that I have to go in with her until she is a little older....and I can trust her alone.
 

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I think it might be helpful to take a second look at your house and put away anything in her reach that she can make a really big mess with. i.e. why is there a huge jar of pennies within her reach in the bathroom? And green paint? In my house, this would be asking for it! My main discipline mentality is to avoid these situations in the first place. A 3 year old just does not have the capacity to understand. And what a pain to have to supervise CONSTANTLY. I have a 9 mo and I can't constantly be supervising. So basically, if Im out of the room and he gets into something he shouldn't have, well, I explain why it's no good and we move on. And I learn better for next time. (no more drawing with pen while I'm out of the room! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">)
 

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I agree with the suggestion that you go through your house again with an eye to what she can possibly get into. It sounds like her curiosity is getting the better of her and that she may have some issues with impulse control. Like if she sees something really enticing, she just can't stop herself from investigating. Try to look at your house from her vantage point and remove those things that will set her up to "fail" and have you pulling out your hair.<br><br>
Good luck, Mama. I'm rooting for you.
 

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I agree with the poster above me.<br><br>
I think three year olds should be able to roam the house. Heck, by three, I was roaming the neighborhood.<br><br>
I think you should pre-school proof the house. She's still going to do things, but as long as it's undoable, and not dangerous, it's basically O.K.<br><br>
Dumping the pennies isn't a huge deal. But, painting the bathroom is.<br><br>
So, make sure what she can get into isn't a big deal. For instance, put the shampoo and liquid soaps up high, because that would be an expensive experiement. An easle could give her an outlet for her creativity, but, she could just as easily draw all over the walls.<br><br>
I jsut had an "it'll happen, and it's not the end of the world" attitude about things getting wrecked. I just didn't want it to cost me a lot of money, so I kept the important things up out of her reach.<br><br>
My dd had LOTS of freedom at age three. SO, I don't think they need that much supervision as long as you know what she can and can't reach.
 
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