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<p>I found out one week ago yesterday at my 20 week prenatal appointment that my little girl had passed away. Not sure when she passed. They estimated that growth stopped around 15 weeks. I had a prenatal appointment around that time and we heard a strong heartbeat then. I saw my midwifes back up OB last Wednesday and he said it could be another two weeks before she is born. Right now we are planning a homebirth with my midwife and to let nature take care of things. My labs are all normal and I am healthy. This is my first loss after three healthy, uneventful pregnancies. I have been given the option of taking cytotec at home to help speed the process but I am not ready to do that quite yet. I have tried acupuncture and cotton root bark to help things along. I have periods of crampiness and some contractions but nothing else.</p>
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<p>If you went through this can you tell me how long it took from finding out your baby was gone until you delivered it? Any other suggestions on how to get things moving in that direction?</p>
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<p>Thank you and I am sorry for all of your losses. No mother should ever have to go through this.</p>
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<p>Update: Thank you all for your replies and your support. My 4th daughter was born at home one week ago tonight. She came quickly about 90 minutes after contractions started. My midwife did not make the birth so my husband and I delivered her. A tragic but special moment for both us. My midwife arrived about 10 minutes later. The placenta came out on its own within about 20 minutes. Our baby was perfect and there is no known cause for her passing. I have had no physical complications for which I am grateful for. We buried Hannah Claire on Good Friday.</p>
 

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<p>First off, I am so sorry for your loss.  You're right, no woman should ever have to go through this.  I have only had first trimester losses, but I'll tell you what I know and hopefully someone else can pop in and give more concrete advice.  Personally, I think your hb plan is a solid one.  With my first loss, the baby stopped growing around 5 or 6 weeks, but I didn't find out until 11 weeks and I didn't finally miscarry until 14 weeks.  (Blighted ovum)  So, I think these things can take a long while.  But, the docs said my case was unusual. </p>
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<p>Also, I think you need to mentally (as much as possible) prepare yourself for the birth.  The body tends to start to reabsorb the baby and the baby starts to break down.  I'm sorry, but I know I wanted to be prepared as possible and I would think you would want the same.  You may want to make sure anyone else that's at the birth (like dh) is also prepared. </p>
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<p>As far as the birth itself, it seems like the closer the miscarriage is to the time of a period, the more it's like a period and the closer it is the time of birth, the more it's like a birth.  KWIM? </p>
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<p>I'm sorry if I'm repeating things you already know.  I just felt so unprepared for my miscarriage to be so much like a birth and I wouldn't want another woman to feel like that. </p>
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<p>To try to move my miscarriage along I was taking megadoses of Vitamin C and going for runs.  I don't think either made a difference, but the runs did help me mentally. </p>
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<p>Again, I'm SO sorry you have to go through with this. </p>
 

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<p>I am so so sorry for your loss.  It is so very hard.  My second loss was at 12 weeks 5 days.  I experienced actual labor (worse than labor actually) pains.  For me, the contractions would come and go (every 2-3 minutes and last for 45 seconds) but I had continual pain in my cervix and lower uterus.  It took two days of this labor (3-5 hours each day) until I passed the baby.  During those labors, there was quite a bit of blood and lots of clots.  When the time came, I did have to push the baby out, like in a real birth but that was much easier than the labor part.  My midwife said that not having a heavy baby pressing on your cervix is what can make the labor for miscarriage a little more painful and drawn out than a full term labor.  I labored at home, too.  I think your idea of laboring/birthing at home is a good one.  It is my understanding that (like Xerxella said) the closer you are to term the more like a term birth it will be.  To get things going for me, my midwife suggested taking False Unicorn Root 3-4 times a day (it comes in a little bottle with a droppler screw cap and I found it at Vitamin Shoppe) and taking frequent baths with Epsom salt and apple cider vinegar.  She also suggested lots of strongly brewed red raspberry leaf tea. </p>
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<p>I am sorry I don't have much more info to give you.  A loss really terrible.  I wish you a peaceful home birth with no complications and lots of love and support on your difficult journey ahead.  (((HUGS)))</p>
 

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<p>So sooooo sorry for your loss. I went into preterm labor the day before I turned 18 weeks (march 4th). For me there were terribly painful contractions for about 28 hours. I got to the hospital at 6am and delivered at 8:46pm. When I got to the hospital I was not dilated at all - around 7pm I was 4 cm and fully dilated by 8:20pm. So things moved pretty fast once I dilated. Do you know if you are at all? That could make a difference. I had an early loss 4 years ago and needed a D&C. A friend told me the meds made the experience too painful - physically and emotionally. I hope that this helps you a bit. This is a terrible place to be emotionally. *hugs*</p>
 
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