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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I was wondering, since this forum has so much very private information, is there a way to have threads that are not stickied "dumped" and erased every so often? I was thinking of the ashley madison hack and had a minor panic about if this board somehow was compromised.
 

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I'm sorry, ASF, I meant to respond! I suppose we could ask admin to do something like that but it might be better if we each just go back through our own posts and edit as we wish to. I rely on rereading my old threads to cross reference things I've documented because I can put more details in a post than in a line in a journal entry or on a calendar. It's also nice to look back and see how far I've come, revisit smart advice I've received, etc.

The hacking of that Ashley Madison website was inevitable since it was explicitly geared for people who had the intent to cheat. I think it's pretty unlikely that our tiny forum will be the target of hackers. There's no big scandal to be made. We're already divorced! Most of us, anyway.

I do get what you mean, though.
 

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I'm thinking I would prefer to go back and delete my own threads. I do somehow take comfort in that my story is documented somewhere....and if anything disappeared I think I would feel some of that was lost - since so much is captured here.

I guess I am not too concerned unless it were my xh that hacked into here somehow, but I don't think he really could be all that bothered to do so....and definitely would not have the patience to read through it all!
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
I feel that paranoid because of a number of things
- a lady at the domestic violence group said that her ex had hacked into her home security system and used the info to break into her house when she was away and to watch her in her house.
- a lady from the same groups ex had a friend install a gps on her car when she was in court with him
- the ex of someone here logging into here (lilgreen?)
- my ex getting info on my doctors etc by having his wife call and pretend to be me

I was just thinking that info dating back to like 2012 was a long time for stuff to be "out there"
 

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I understand the concern. I have been through periods where I thought xh might try stuff like that (and he still might). If there were a mass cleanup of old threads I guess I would just want to have enough notice to print my old ones to PDF just for documentation purposes and to look back on how much I have learned over the years.

That's really creepy all the things they will do. Makes me wonder...
 

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Lilgreen's ex said he just saw it logged in on her computer.

I have considered going back and doing some clean up too.
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
I understand the concern. I have been through periods where I thought xh might try stuff like that (and he still might). If there were a mass cleanup of old threads I guess I would just want to have enough notice to print my old ones to PDF just for documentation purposes and to look back on how much I have learned over the years.

That's really creepy all the things they will do. Makes me wonder...
It is so gross how far they will go - shoot my ex set up fake profiles on cheating and swinger sites with my pics - not to try to "get me" for court but to pretend to be a cheating wife for some sexual cuckold fantasy. He loved to pretend that I was cheating on him - it was one of his biggest fantasies. Bleck
 

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The crazy thing is the if they cheated on us, it's total indignant offended denial. I am 100% certain that if I didn't have recordings of xh admitting to and defending being caught packing condoms for his 'business' trips, he would have claimed I made up some elaborate story. He denied every single assault except the obvious one caught on tape. But of course he says I heavily edited the recording and deleted all the parts where I was yelling and throwing things at him (which I wasn't).

So yeah, I wouldn't put it past any of them to find ways to mess with our support systems. It would be nice if there were a little more security like the email and FB accounts that have 2 step verification etc.
 

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The crazy thing is the if they cheated on us, it's total indignant offended denial. I am 100% certain that if I didn't have recordings of xh admitting to and defending being caught packing condoms for his 'business' trips, he would have claimed I made up some elaborate story. He denied every single assault except the obvious one caught on tape. But of course he says I heavily edited the recording and deleted all the parts where I was yelling and throwing things at him (which I wasn't).

So yeah, I wouldn't put it past any of them to find ways to mess with our support systems. It would be nice if there were a little more security like the email and FB accounts that have 2 step verification etc.
ASF - I always wondered about that. That is one of the common traits with some abusers too - jealousy and cheating. My XH couldn't stop accusing me of cheating. It makes me wonder looking back if I should have been more suspicious.
 

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Discussion Starter · #12 ·
ASF - I always wondered about that. That is one of the common traits with some abusers too - jealousy and cheating. My XH couldn't stop accusing me of cheating. It makes me wonder looking back if I should have been more suspicious.
My ex insisted that he never had sex with any one else and that he only had multiple ongoing emotional affairs. The biggest one to piss me off was a lady he had IN OUR HOUSE at our kids bday parties and he was having this nasty ongoing online affair.
 

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My XH was home alone and online a lot of it is a possibility. I didn't find out until the end his exGF had been emailing him and his parents trying to get back together. XH insisted he deleted those.

My college BF is the only one I strongly suspect cheated on me or attempted to. He used to meet women "friends" all the time and not tell me about them. He even got into a car accident while out with one. I didn't find out about her until I asked him if he knew anything about some recurrent phone charges I was getting to a number I didn't recognize. He would also go on hikes alone with a stripper he met and I found out about that through my college's rumor mill.
 
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