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Reassure me please...

676 Views 12 Replies 12 Participants Last post by  chiro_kristin
Should my baby be 'playing' more? Should I be encouraging her to? My mother gave an earful about how my neice *loves* her little floor-gym (I think tha'ts what it's called--she lays on the floor and these toys dangle from a frame), and does my baby do that yet? My niece is three or four weeks younger than Ellie. Ellie is 13 weeks today.

Sometimes I'll give her something to hold and wave around in her hand, but she doesn't seem to care much. Once or twice she seemed pleased and surprised at a diferently textured thing (I was out walking and gave her a baby cattail to hold--she liked that and hng on for a while), but mostly she doens't seem interest in anything but people.

My mother was tellign me all about how I should be putting pictures of animals and things in her basket (she sleeps in her basket for naps sometimes), or hang toys from the handles for her, but she just seems uninterested.

Would she liek toys at this age if I gave them to her? Should I? She seems to just want to interact with people at this age, and loves flirting with strangers when I wear her--she hates facing in in the wrap if she at all alert and awake--can only snuggle her facign in when she is sleepy...
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Ah, hon, you're babe sounds fine... does she react to seeing you and hearing your voice?

She's probably feelin' so lucky to have a momma like you that she'd rather bask in that than play...

Alright, that was a little cheesy but thats what DH told me when I was worried about the same thing when DS was about 3 months.
My DD was the same way. (And my mom was about ready to call CPS because she didn't have a mobile to look at, lol!) At around 12 weeks or so it occurred to me that maybe she would enjoy having some dangling toys to look at/bat at, and I tried some out with her in a baby secondhand store and she really was interested in them. So I got her a little gymini and a thingie that clipped onto a stroller, carseat or baby seat that had some dangling toys. That would interest her for a few minutes at a time, but she really preferred people and faces. But I think that they have varying levels of interest in toys and stuff, and at different times. You will know when she's wanting/ready for a bit more stimulation of that sort. I don't think you need to worry about encouraging it, you'll notice that she starts having more interest in grabbing objects and looking at things and you'll naturally respond by giving her more things. The animals in the basket thing just sounds silly to me--when the babies are awake and in arms or slings or whatever we can talk to them about what we see. Mostly at that age though they just want to be with mommy!

Now at 9 months DD is really into toys (and dirt and bugs and the dogs and everything in my lower kitchen shelves!) and you can't keep her away from playing with everything she comes across--so it will happen in it's own good time, without any particular encouragement needed from you! (OTOH it won't HURT her to put an animal picture in the basket or hang a toy from a handle somewhere if it will make grandma happy and get her off your back! I am all about making small compromises in areas where it won't make any real difference one way or another to appease the grandparents!)
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DD is about to hit 5 months (on the 9th!), and has just recently started getting into toys . . . and by toys I mean small handheld things, which she will wave around and chew on while sitting in someone's lap. She still isn't too interested in her playgym, mostly I think because she hates being put down--she would much rather be held!
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Sound normal! DD is 14 weeks and like some toys...especiallythe one that have the crackly mylar in them. Mostly though she like playing with my hands, her hand, the bottom of her shirt, daddy's eyebrows...
She is way more into people.
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Humans survived for thousands of years without playing with floor gyms or whatever. (I'm all for using them if your babe enjoys them, but there is no reason to "encourage" your dc to play with one.) IMO, what you're doing, letting your dc explore her world, and giving her random things to hold and explore, is the best thing you can be doing for her.
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My Ds is 5mo and honestly, he has about 5 different toys and a bunch of books. That's it.

At 13 weeks his favorite "toy" was plastic bags. We put them at his feet and he loved to kick it and make noise. Mostly we talk, sing, dance, and interact with Ds outselves. Make faces, let him talk to us, put him on grass, go for walks, let him touch our cold drink glasses, bascially let him explore the world as he can.

Ds has used two different types of those "lay on your back and bat at the toys" type things but his interest waned after a few minutes. Interest in making noise with the plastic bag went on forever. Mostly, I think, because he was in control and could test all kinds of cause and effect by himself. He liked being able to manipulate it. Anyhow, your Dd sounds normal to me.
I wanted to add one more thing--I think that there are a lot of well-intentioned ideas about "stimulating" babies and developing their intellects, etc. which your mom is probably basing her ideas on. For example, the whole thing with "developmental toys" like the Lamaze developmental stuff. These things are based on developmental research, like they lay babies down and give them things to look at and see what images babies prefer. That's why those toys are black and white with strong contrasts. And they often have pictures of faces, and bull's-eye shapes for the baby to look at. Well, basically that is because babies are programmed to want to look at faces, especially women's faces, and the bull's-eye is really the nipple/areola/breast--they are "hard-wired" to look at those things!

So, if you have a baby who is spending most of it's time in a crib and not interacting with it's parents, those toys/products could be an improvement. However, really, the best thing for your baby is YOUR face, YOUR breast, and interaction with you!
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He's obviously more impressed with people than he is with things, which is one of the goals of attachment parenting. So...congratulations.
hahaha, I think I only put my daughter down at 13 weeks "to play" when I changed her diaper on the living room floor and then left her there cause she was happy. She tried to roll over a few times, but never really did anything more than that.
I'd say relax! My dd is WAY ahead on all her milestones and we have never worried about stimulating her. At 12-13 weeks she was smiling and did enjoy the play mat but we didn't make a concerted effort on any of this stuff or purposely put her there for development.....just when it seemed like the thing to do.
Children of AP parents are often less interested in toys than other children. Often it's because the children are more interested in playing with their parents than toys. I wouldn't worry about it. Some children NEVER really show interest in toys.

Originally Posted by papayapetunia
He's obviously more impressed with people than he is with things, which is one of the goals of attachment parenting. So...congratulations.
I 100% agree!
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