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Recording conversations?

656 Views 10 Replies 11 Participants Last post by  papayapetunia
I really want to show our judge just how hot tempered STBX is. He's downright INSANE at times. He can go from carrying on a normal conversation with me to SCREAMING at the top of his lungs and calling me names. I have thought about recording our phone conversations as proof. Would tapes of phone conversations be accepted in court? I am fighting for full custody and one of the main reasons is his use of drugs and hot temper. I know he'll admit drug use to me over the phone (at least pot smoking) and he calls to yell at me pretty often so I'm sure I can catch that on tape too. I'm just worried about a judge perceiving this is sneaky and spiteful behavior.

Should I bother?
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heck if George W can do it i dont see why u cant.

well i think there is no harm in doing it and keeping it for future reference. its there if u need it. ur lawyer would be the best guide. maybe u might need it if things dont go the way you want to.

but focus on his anger. remember drug use does not make him a bad father. explosive irrational rage does on teh other hand. perhaps be also prepared for any face to face conversation.
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Just b/c GW does it doesn't mean we can. Recording a phone call without someone's consent w/o legal wire tap order is inadmissable in most states, but I would still check with an attorney. Maybe there is a way around it
I agree. Check with a lawyer first. You'd hate to have it backfire on you and then be used against you in some way.

Originally Posted by MsChatsAlot
I agree. Check with a lawyer first. You'd hate to have it backfire on you and then be used against you in some way.
I was going to say "do it", but I have to agree w/ MsChatsAlot...don't jeapordize yourself. Check first.
Whether or not it's legal depends on the state. In NY (where I am) you can have one party consent, meaning I can tape a call without the other person knowing & it's legal. My brother, the cop, had me ask the lawyer. He's down in VA & iirc, it's illegal there.

The lawyer said the reservations a judge tends to have is the tape can be presented as one-sided. For example, you know you are being recorded so you can be nice & sweet and/or edit out what you don't like, etc. It can also sound forced, like if you got him to admit his drug use.

I would definitely find out the legalities of it in Florida & you could always do it and not use it. I would also save any crazy messages he may leave on your answering machine or voice mail...that would definitely help, since he agrees to be recorded by leaving a message.
ITA w/ PP. My understanding is it is nearly all 50 states allow one-party consent. That is, only one side of the conversation needs to be aware of and agree to recording the conversation. Check with your lawyer about local details on that, particularly mentioning any time that you have legal record of his temper (cops called on him, restraining order, etc).

Of course, way too much of my "legal knowledge" comes from Law & Order and CSI...
In NC and VA both will allow you to tape your own phone conversations. It is not illegal unless you are taping someone elses.

For another words, bugging your neighbors phone is bad but taping your ex cussing you is good (well not good in that sense)

But word of warning...if you do tape them, watch what you say. If he gets you mad and you cuss him back it will look bad on you even if he threatens to kill you in the same conversation, I found that out the hard way.
I'd check with a laywer. It may be legal to tape the conversations, but you don't want your judge to think you are being malicious or anything. Good Luck!
I live in Michigan and my attorney advised me to record my conversations. In Michigan they are not permissable in court but he said that during the FOC investigation that they would be open to listening to the conversations.
My ex is pretty predictable about flying into a rage. So I set him off on one and then hung up on him. Bingo. He called me back 27 times and left angry messages on my phone. I recorded them and let him know that at the next hearing, I'd be playing the tapes for the judge. He was so embarrassed and freaked out, that he didn't even show up. I got full legal and physical custody and all the back child support I asked for plus the state's caluclated child support amount. Then I gave the tape to his other ex who is going through a custody battle with him too. It was sweet revenge for 7 years of bullshit and no child support.
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