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Refusing to Nurse to Sleep??! Help?

400 Views 3 Replies 4 Participants Last post by  DaryLLL
My 15 month old son has always nursed to sleep and slept with us. However, he has gone through phases in which he REFUSES to nurse to sleep. He is doing this now and has been for a month. Typically, we do the nighttime routine, which used to end in nursing then sleep, but now he nurses and then gets up and wants to play. He is obviously tired though because if my husband takes him all my husband has to do is hold him on his chest for like 3 minutes while patting his back and he is out like a light!

Naps are a nightmare. I can hardly get him to sleep.

-I used to be able to hold him and sing to him if he wouldn't nurse to sleep, but he is too big and strong now and he fights me so hard I can't physically hold onto him.

-He hates rocking (always has)

-If I try to lie next to him on the bed, he just gets up and crawls/walks away. He can't be left on the bed if he isn't asleep, or he'll just wander off.

-The back patting thing doesn't work for me, he fights and bites and kicks and I can't hold him.

I am out of tricks and I can't think of anything else to do with him. I think I have to try putting him in a crib, but I don't want to leave him alone and I'm sure he will cry. Is he telling me he is done nursing to sleep and wants to go to sleep on his own? This is sure what it looks like to me.

Would appreciate any advice or similar experiences.

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My ds has hardly ever wanted to nurse to sleep so we have always done a lot of rocking, bouncing, singing, etc... in this household. When ds was about 12-13 months we put a double mattress on the floor in his room and we would lay beside him to help him go to sleep. Like your ds, he would nurse and then get up and play. What we did was make his room completely baby-friendly so that he could roam and I could just lay there and pretend to sleep (although the break was certainly welcome!) He would play a bit, come back and snuggle, play a bit more and eventually he would come back and go to sleep. We also limited the amount of toys in his room so that there wasn't too much to do. Just books, stuffed toys, things like that.

Some days it could take up to an hour for him to finally settle down enough to go to sleep but (as with most other things) it was a phase and he now goes to sleep within 5 minutes for a nap and usually 20-30 minutes for bedtime. And it's his idea to crawl into bed and go to sleep!

Not sure if that helps you or not but it was our experience. The only other advice I can give is that when you are lying down with your ds and it's taking up to an hour to get him to sleep try not to think of all the stuff you "need" to get done. Trust me it won't help your frustration level! Once I let go of thinking about all the chores that I should be getting done I started to really enjoy that time with my ds.
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Nothing to say to help, as last night dd took 3 HOURS to get to sleep, with a combination of nursing, rocking, etc. I'm a zombie today...

Oh, except that she's also 15 months, and dh has been having lots of nap trouble w/ her lately too, so maybe it's a developmental thing?
Probably it's the joy of walking!

For naps, I used to take a car ride if I needed to. That movement would satisfy the joy of movement need, but is more boring and mesmerizing than walking on your own steam.

At night, a bath would work well. Letting off some steam, but the warm water is soothing. Lavender oil in it perhaps?

Putting baby in the sling and swaying, dancing vigorously to rhythmic rather loud music? Something you like--it can actually be fun.
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