Sorry you are having a miserable time, how long have you been married?
Sometimes I regret getting married, not the kids, they are wonderful. Part of the reason I do is because I feel the burden of his crap and it can weigh you down.
"He seems so passionless"
Mine is like that..no friends, no hobby, and he gets all down and low and BLAH...it SEEMS like he blames me. I do my best to have my life away from him, but he says we are all he needs, which I really do not understand.
It sounds like you want him to have his own life a bit, I tried that with mine, didn't work so I just tried to improve my own.