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I am not sure how to ask this, sorry if I offend anyone.<br><br>
My niece was stillborn about a year ago, and I wanted to send something nice to the family to remember her birthday. I read through the Do's and Don't's but there was nothing about birthdays.<br><br>
I was looking at <a href="http://www.aplacetoremember.com/aptrfront.html" target="_blank">http://www.aplacetoremember.com/aptrfront.html</a> I was thinking an angel book <a href="http://www.aplacetoremember.com/mall/prod_detail.asp?catID=1&prodID=881" target="_blank">http://www.aplacetoremember.com/mall...D=1&prodID=881</a> but after reading the other thread...I am not sure I should send anything with an angel???<br><br>
I was also thinking of sending a the heart pendant "missing link" with the babies name.<br><br>
Any thoughtful ideas would be greatly appriciated.
 

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I think it's wonderful for you to remember and acknowledge her on her birthday. I'm so sorry for your family's loss. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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I also think it is very dear of you to remember and acknowledge your niece's birhtday.<br><br>
I am not coming at this as someone who has had a stillborn child, but I did have some thoughts about it. My sense is not to send them an object. Somehow I'm thinking that would make more sense for them to choose that type of thing, unless it is something you are really sure about. My take is to send a card--that in itself would be plenty and much appreciated, but if you wanted to do something else you could make a donation in her honor. Or maybe plant a tree or flower. Or sponsor a tree somewhere. Just ideas. The thought is beautiful.
 

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I would enjoy flowers... I think it would brighten up the living space of those remembering a dark, difficult time. But flowers alone are too easy... send a poem (that you wrote!) or a very thoughtful note along.<br>
I also really like the idea of a donation or tree planted in the child's name.<br><br>
I would not want a "thing" (i.e. necklace) as a reminder, especially one given to me by someone else.
 

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I also think a card and the acknowledgement of what has happened that goes along with the card is plenty. So many simply ignore it, thinking that we are "too upset" and that mentioning the lost child would somehow make it worse. Something in the babe's honor like a donation is a nice thought.<br><br>
Flowers would be nice, but truthfully, a card and your thoughts would be a wonderful gift. (I wouldn't want a thing - jewelry/plant/etc . . .)
 

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I think letting the family know that you're thinking of them and their LO is a gesture that would be greatly appreciated. So many people pretend that they never existed.<br><br>
I wouldn't mind a plant or flowers, a card, a poem. I wouldn't want to receive jewelry or anything like that (except from my DH). A book of poetry might be nice, if it has special meaning.<br><br>
But honestly, just letting them know you're thinking of their LO, however you go about it, is a wonderful gesture.
 

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I don't like the idea of flowers...because they die.<br><br>
For my ds1's first birthday a friend sent a heart pendant with his name and I love it. I also got things like- a star named for him (<a href="http:" target="_blank">www.starregistry.org)</a>, a donation to the March of Dimes and lots of phonecalls/candles lit/handwritten cards. The first birthday is very tough, but it helps to know that people are thinking of your baby.<br><br>
What is your neice's name?
 

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Personally I think that ANY gesture to acknowledge the birth of your niece would be greatly appreciated. I am a mother who lost her baby just days after giving birth and I wish more of my friends and family would talk to me about her. It is so painful when they say nothing and pretend it never happened. So whether you decide to send a card or something else, it will be so much better than letting the day pass without saying anything.
 

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I'm so sorry for your family's loss. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">s<br><br>
My DD was stillborn in '05 and I was more impressed by people remembering than them actually giving me something. A card was more than enough b/c so often people forget and move on. As parents of stillborn children, we relive it every.single.day. We can't ever forget.<br><br>
I think if you sent a card and called just letting them know that you are thinking of them and that you remembered your neice's birthday, that would be perfectly fine.
 

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I would be so happy for ANY recognition of my babies who've died!
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"><br><br>
What a wonderful friend you are to remember!<br><br>
Any gift given from the heart in remembrance would be appreciated.
 
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