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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
There's always been a bit of sadness as DD reaches milestones, but for the most part I have watched her grow with pleasure and excitement at the things to come. But for some reason, in the past week or so, the sadness has become intense.<br><br>
She's almost 6 1/2, and if I assume that she'll go off to college at 18 and not return home (that's what I did, anyway! I know she may not do the same, but I'm just talking hypothetically here), a third of her time at home is already over. That scares me, really. And now she finally has two loose teeth, to her delight - she is one of the few in her class with no missing ones yet. The idea of her smile changing upsets me, too. I love her big smile with all her little teeth!<br><br>
Where is this coming from? She is my only child and my DH and I have been struggling with the second child issue for quite a while - I'm a yes, he's a "not so sure." Could that be it? Has anyone else felt this way?<br><br>
Oh, and I'm having a birthday next week, and it's kind of a milestone birthday, one that ends with a five, anyway. I don't know, I just feel like I want to freeze time. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad">
 

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YES I feel that way! I want to savor every moment of my little one's growing up. I wish I had a newborn, a 9 month old, a 16 month old, a two year old, a 3 year old and a 4 year old version of my little one to keep forever. My ds is 5 now and has a loose tooth. I was in shock, it is too soon for his baby teeth to fall out! I miss the huge big smile he used to have - now he has a self-conscious "say cheese smile". I rocked him to sleep for every single nap until he was 5 years old when he asked to stay at school for nap. He would rather play with other kids than with me, I used to be his favorite playmate. I have a hard time cleaning out his old toys too. I am saving some of his favorite toys. My ds is an only because of physical limitations but I remember longing to get pregnant again when he was only 6 months old. I think that having another baby wouldn't take this feeling away, it is grieving for the baby that is lost to the grown up child. I truly believe that these are the best years of our lives. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/thumb.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="thumbs up">
 

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Finally someone who wouldn't look at me crazy. I often think about it in terms of time like that. My dd is almost 6 and I think omg that's 1/3 of her time here at home. What's worse is it went by so fast <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"> I have a ds who is 5 and so technically they will leave at the same time since they are in the same grade. For now I am just trying to savor every moment and it's always my one piece of advice for new parents. It just goes by way too fast.<br><br>
Right now we are trying to conceive #3. I don't know if it has anything to do with all of that but in my mind, at least, I think it will help. That is not why I want another one though.
 

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I've been going thru this, my youngest is 10mos old and mobile, and my oldest dd just turned five and I'm realizing that this summer is the last of my time with her, in a way, she'll be in kindergarten in the fall and to me that seems like the end, she'll be in school full time for the rest of her life. On top of that she's wanting to spend more time with her little friends, and sometimes preferring to be with them over me. On the positive side, it's making me see that while my kids may seem so demanding and time consuming and annoying at times, this time I have to "give up" for them is just a fraction of my life. Thinking that way gives me a bit more energy at times and helps me think a little more clearly when I'm feeling stressed and "trapped"
 

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My son will be one june 6th--and I ALREADY feel that way!<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/happytears.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="happytears">:
 

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My dd is 5 and will start K in the fall <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/mecry.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="crying"> Talk about bittersweet. Yesterday when I picked her up from day care they sent home the children's pillows and blankets b/c they will no longer take naps. There is only 3 days left of day care and then next week she starts summer camp.<br><br>
I can see it now, 2.5 months from now I'll be standing at the bus stop wondering were the time went, and trying to be brave for my baby as she goes on to "big kids school"
 

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My little girl is now 11.She's starting to develop and change into a young woman. And even though I am so proud of all her accomplishments there are times when I feel very sad and wistful that her childhood is basically ending. There are things I thought we'd do that we didn't,and everything just seemed to go too fast. A million years wouldn't have been enough. Those of you who still have little girls take the time to sit down for a tea party with them and wear the tiara and plastic jewelry,ok?
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>GreenHippieMama</strong></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">My little girl is now 11.She's starting to develop and change into a young woman. And even though I am so proud of all her accomplishments there are times when I feel very sad and wistful that her childhood is basically ending. There are things I thought we'd do that we didn't,and everything just seemed to go too fast. A million years wouldn't have been enough. <span style="text-decoration:underline;">Those of you who still have little girls take the time to sit down for a tea party with them and wear the tiara and plastic jewelry,ok</span>?</div>
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<br>
I will <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">s<br><br>
Ive had these feelings too mamas...dd is 3 & 1.5 months old and she wants to do everything herself practically...still having a breastfeeding relationship with her I think helps lessen that feeling of sadness for me...I'm happy to have her getting older because I have things I want to do for me before I try for another child.<br><br>
One thing I noticed in a few of the posts....that the child would be leaving the home at 18,,,this seems like cultural conditioning to me that at 18, its time to move out (not talking about going away to college).<br><br>
Anyway, I get sentimental at times but focus on the now and enjoy watching her grow...the love between us grows as much as she does...I also look forward to being a grandma to her baby <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/orngbiggrin.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="orange big grin"><br><br>
blessings~~
 

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I have been feeling mixed feelings the past couple of weeks about dd<br>
turning 5 this month. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/happytears.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="happytears">: My dd and I share a birthday, so I imagine<br>
that my feelings aren't only about her turning 5, but about turning 30<br>
myself. At least I am not freaking out like some of my friends have.<br>
I am very excited about turning 30. I don't have any problems becoming<br>
a year older, I guess I feel a tick tick starting that I don't like hearing.<br>
I want to have more children, and as a single Mom I can't make a baby<br>
all by myself. :LOL So while am hearing the tick tick, I am watching my<br>
dd grow up so fast. The other day when I got up, went to the bathroom.<br>
Dd got up, got dressed, and when I walked out of the bathroom was<br>
sitting at the kitchen table eating cereal. Okay so she gets dressed<br>
herself everyday, she likes picking her own clothes. Plus this isn't the<br>
first time she has got her own cereal. But it just all hit me at once, plus<br>
she actually matched <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/bigeyes.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="bigeyes"> she never matches. She was so put<br>
together, and got her own meal and was sitting there so cheerful, and<br>
part of me just wanted to cry.<br>
This also happened last Fall when I put dd's new school picture up on<br>
the wall. I kept looking back and forth from last years picture, to this<br>
years. Last year's picture with her cute cubby cheeks and awkward smile.<br>
This year she looked so grown up.<br>
I imagine most Mother's go threw this, watching their little ones become<br>
big ones, into teens, and into the world.
 

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I have similar feelings. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"><br><br>
My baby will be 7 in July...<br><br>
Since my older ones are 16 and 20, it makes me quite emotional sometimes. I have been here before. Time moves much to quickly for me these days.<br><br>
Hang in there, you are not alone.<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/love.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="love">
 

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Discussion Starter · #12 ·
Thanks for all the heartfelt replies!<br><br>
I will definitely continue to spend lots of time with her and make lots of wonderful memories, for her as well as myself. I'm telling you, that "Having a child means having your heart go walking around outside your body" quote is pretty much how I feel these days. Anyone recall who said that one?<br><br>
I think part of my sadness is also due to my own age! I'm not "old" by any means, but I'm 35 today (<span style="font-size:xx-small;">a little happy birthday wish to me <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"></span>) and I just have this weird feeling that I've climbed up a big hill and now I'm going down the other side. I think I need to get used to what feels like the next chapter in my life.
 

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I totally hear you mama. We have a 5.5 yr old finishing up senior kindergarten this month and Dh and I have become totally emotional over her growing up. I too fret over college (geez!) and stuff. She just seems so grown up.............<br><br>
For what it's worth, we have a second child now who is 14 months and it makes it nearly harder to watch..LOL <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/happytears.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="happytears">: because we are constantly saying "remeber when Jules did this?" or "wow, she did that like Jules did" and it just reminds us that the oldest is way past the baby she was to us and we can't reclaim that and the one yr old is growing fast too! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"><br><br>
But, I think it is normal to get melancholy over it all. We are debating a 3rd child, and I too wonder if it is right........if I am trying to stay young (in my 30s now) or trying to maintain young babies around us LOL............<br><br>
WIsh I could help...but just know you're not alone. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/love.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="love">
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/birthday.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="birthday">: lunamom <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 

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<div style="text-align:center;"><span style="font-size:x-large;">LunaMom</span><br><br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/dust.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="dust"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/birthday.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="birthday">: <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/dust.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="dust"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/birthday.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="birthday">: <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/dust.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="dust"><br><br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/carrot.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="carrot"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/drum.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="drum">: <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/banana.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="banana"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/carrot.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="carrot"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/drum.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="drum">: <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/banana.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="banana"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/carrot.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="carrot"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/drum.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="drum">: <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/banana.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="banana"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/carrot.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="carrot"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/drum.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="drum">: <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/banana.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="banana"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/carrot.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="carrot"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/drum.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="drum">: <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/banana.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="banana"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/drum.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="drum">: <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/carrot.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="carrot"></div>
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/jaw.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="dropjaw"><br><br>
I *SO* did not need to think about the fact that DD is 1/3 of the way to college.
 

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Happy birthday, old friend!<br><br>
I am feeling the same way, with the anticipation of ds turning 5 in August and going to kindergarten in the fall. I am planning to shed lots of tears at his preschool GRADUATION this Friday morning! My sweet boy is too young to be graduating from anything!!!
 

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Discussion Starter · #18 ·
Hey there, teachma! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/love.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="love"> I'm sure your son will adore kindergarten!<br><br>
Thanks for all the birthday wishes!<br><br>
Tiredx2, I'm so sorry!!! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/shy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="innocent">
 
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