the term housewife conjures up images of the 1950's fake smiling, always dressed up, overworked wife and mother.<br><br>
I don't really like the term. No one has ever called me a housewife before, so I've never really thought about it.<br><br>
I like the term SAHM just fine. I guess I am a SAHM although I do attend at least one class per term and am taking one online this coming term. To me, I'm a mother, wife, and student. I'm not 100% comfy with any one label.
Yes I do resent it when people assume that, just because I'm a SAHM, I'm a housewife. I'm NOT and never have been a housewife. My only reason for staying home is to care for my children. DH & I have been together for a decade and I worked all along until I had our first child. I have nothing against housewives. I just don't see why a mother who cares for her children at home is automatically assumed to be a housewife. My main function is the care of my children, NOT the house! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/censored.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="censored"> the house!<br><br>
*ETA: I don't even care for the term SAHM since I generally don't stay at home all day. We go out to the park, run errands, visit friends, homeschool feild trips, etc. I prefer Stay With Child Mother ~ SWCM. Someone coined that term here though I can't remember who. That more accurately describes it.<br><br>
IMO, though, a housewife and a SAHM are two different things. As for my occupation, yes SAHM is fine. Though of course I wish we could change it to SWCM. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/love.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="love">
I just think of myself as a Mother <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br>
I think that SAHM, or house wife, or homemaker, or whatever....is just pointing out that you don't do any "other" work. You know, "real" work. My most important job is a Mother. Because I am a Mother, I clean and cook nutritious meals, and all that other business. So Mother sums it up for me, if I am forced to write something down.
I don't like housewife. I'm not married to the house and a lot more is going on than a black and white picture can express.<br><br>
I don't like homemaker (I wouldn't be here if it was about the house)<br><br>
I don't like SAHM because I don't stay at home.<br><br>
I don't like soccer mom or anything else for that matter.<br><br>
I'm a mom and a student and I guess I just don't like labels.<br><br>
I'm not a mom or a sahm or a housewife.<br><br>
I'm a profesional lifestyle programmer. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/ROTFLMAO.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="rotflmao">
Eh- it doesnt bother me, although I havent been called that. I usually just say SAHM....homemaker is also fine with me as I, as the mother, am the heart of the home for my husband and children. On things where I have to check off my occupation I usually check off "managerial position" or something like that...lol
I HATE that word and am very glad that no one has ever called me that. I'm not married to a house. Why do I need a label at all? Is my DH called a "working husband"?<br><br>
When someone asks me what I do, I tell them I'm an artist or I'm raising my family. Or I have my own business. All are true.<br><br>
So this is my long-winded way of saying yes, I resent the term. And (even though you didn't ask) I also resent the term "Mrs.". Why is it that men don't get a change in title when they get married but women do?<br><br>
Okay, off my soapbox. Didn't mean to sound preachy, just expressing my opinion.
I don't like it because it just doesn't fit.<br><br>
The 'house' part implies that the main duty is to take care of the house, and as MANatural so eloquently put it "<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/censored.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="censored"> the house"<br><br>
The "wife" part implies that the other focus is on the husband, ie taking care of his needs, keeping his house clean, cooking his dinner. While, because I am usually in closer proximity to the broom and the stove during the day, I do these things it is not because I am the wife and it is my duty.<br><br>
Children don't seem to fit into the "housewife" monniker, however the majority of people I know who do not work do it for the children, not the house.
I hate the term 'housewife' because I don't stay at home because of the house, I do it because of the kids. And I'm not married to the house.<br><br>
I don't mind 'homemaker' because I do feel like I am responsible for the 'tone' of my home, and in that sense I do 'make' the home. It seems a more positive term as well (conjures up more positive images).<br><br>
Still, I am neither overdressed 50's fake-smiley mom nor chubby happy cookie-making mom. But really, how many of the out-and-about-working amongst us can accurately describe what they do in a single word? Professions are often difficult to pin down simply.
I don't mind it, but don't think it's really accurate right now. I usually say 'homemaker', because that is what I do. If not for me our apt. would not be the cozy home that it is, y/k? All the terms are similar, but not quite the same. What I see is this:<br>
-sahm-focus is on the kids. housework is more evenly split.<br>
-homemaker-focus is on the family as a unit. i run the house, take care of the baby, plan the meals, take care of family/social obligation type stuff. I guess the difference is that more of the home things(cooking cleaning etc) are considered my domain<br>
-housewife-same as homemaker, but this term, in my mind, does not include young children. Not sure why.<br><br>
So I call myself a homemaker. My aunt who does all the same stuff as me is a housewife, because her youngest is 15 and she doesn't spend all day running after him like I do with my toddler. She cooks more elaborate meals and has a cleaner house than me. My cousin, however, I call a sahm, because she has more children than I do, her oldest is just in kindergarten. They are constantly going to playdates or birthdays or school events and doing more 'mom' stuff like building snowmen and making cookies.<br><br>
I have no idea really why I define and use these terms the way I do, but that's how it is. I don't find any of them inherently offensive or derogitory, although they can of course be used that way. Luckily I don't have to deal with that, as you can see my family tends to understand that just because it doesn't earn money doesn't mean it's not work.
I don't like "housewife" either, it makes it sound like I just moon around the house dusting things until my husband gets home. It reminds me of a pet, like a "housecat".<br><br>
I prefer SAHM although that is a misnomer also, as others have pointed out. I also like SWCM, although I doubt that will catch on. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1"> But since the whole reason for me not having a paying job is so I can be with and raise my children, I feel it more accurately describes what I do. "Housewife" doesn't mention the kids at all.
I don't *resent* the term, but it does annoy me.<br><br>
To me, "housewife" implies a lot of consumerism/immaculate housekeeping/doesn't have outside interests/dependency.<br><br>
I would rather be called Kitty, or, if we must have titles, Domestic Goddess. I am happily very domestic at this stage in my life. And I like the idea of being a strong source of power, guidance, and love.<br><br>
Plus, the whole "desperate housewife" fad just makes the term a bit squicky for me. I mean...yuck.
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>sunnmama</strong></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I just think of myself as a Mother <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br>
I think that SAHM, or house wife, or homemaker, or whatever....is just pointing out that you don't do any "other" work. You know, "real" work. My most important job is a Mother. Because I am a Mother, I clean and cook nutritious meals, and all that other business. So Mother sums it up for me, if I am forced to write something down.</div>
At the BMV a few years ago, on a form, under occupation, I wrote in mother. The woman at the counter told me that mother wasn't an option. She asked me what I do and I told her, "I'm a Mother."<br>
She told me what I needed to write was homemaker. To me, that title implied too little of what I do. I left it as mother, but the woman was quite irked.<br><br>
something else to share...<br><br>
While driving in Indy one day, I saw a billboard. It said:<br><br>
(A woman is driving an SUV on rough terrain with a city scene in the background.)<br><br>
"Whoever coined the term Stay At Home Mom is an idiot."<br><br><br>
call it what you want, but aside from being a housewife, i am a mother, scientist, educator, designer, organizer, etc, etc...<br><br>
i guess i just don't get wrapped up in what people want to call it.<br><br>
my mom has a good term for it: domestic engineer!
I was actually thinking about this today. I was considering that "housewife" is wrong because I'm married to my husband, not my house.<br><br>
"SAHM" is annoying because it reduces what I do to simply staying home and mothering (not that that isn't a huge portion of my life/day).<br><br>
"Mom" seems fairly appropriate, but reduces what WOHMs do to somehow not mothering.<br><br>
"homemaker" is I suppose the best label, but I still don't like it. I can't find one that I like at all. "Domestic Goddess" is even well, too domestic. I'm way more fiesty than that suggests.