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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
This is probably most pertinent to first time moms, but how do you plan to deal with the whole Christmas and Santa thing? Any interesting situation?

I'm proud of myself for figuring this out the other day. The thing is, we have a huge extended family about 3 hours away that we spend Xmas Eve with. There is no way we'll ever be home for Xmas morning, and despite the fact that we're not a Christian household (I'm pagan, husbandman's agnostic) we celebrate 'Giftmas'. On top of it, I can't just ignore the Santa thing because my FIL is the spitting image of Santa, dresses up as him every year, etc. So, it's not like I can have the kid believe in Santa because Santa will never come to our house, and how much would that suck? (Officially, I don't care either way whether or not the kid believes in Santa, I"m concerned about logistics).

So the official plan is we'll do Yule gifts every year and celebrate Giftmas with the family. Santa will be "this silly game grown ups play".

What do you do in your family?
 

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i have a two, almost three, year old and we don't do santa. this is the first year that she is really cognizant of what santa is and that is because she has had a few run-ins with him. i am fine with her being interested in him and i told her that some kids like to pretend that santa brings them presents for christmas and that she can pretend that too, if she wants. we do presents (tho she knows that they are from us and her relatives) and other festive, holiday things. we just don't want to lie to her. she is definitely going to be "that kid" in school and spoil it for the others
i am going to try to explain to her not to do that as she gets older.
 

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We are Christian, and do celebrate Christmas, but we won't be telling our kids that Santa is real. I plan on telling them the stories of Saint Nicholas and that people like to pretend Santa is real. They will know it's only pretend and that the stockings and presents are from us. When they are old enough to decide, I won't mind if they want to visit the fake Santa and tell him what they want/write lists etc (I know kids love their imagination and pretend worlds), but I won't encourage it. I already know much of our families will think we're nuts, ruining Christmas for the kids, and will roll their eyes at us, but I really don't care. I'm not going to tell their kids Santa isn't real, so I hope they don't try to convince mine that he is!
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by queen b View Post
she is definitely going to be "that kid" in school and spoil it for the others
i am going to try to explain to her not to do that as she gets older.
Kids told me Santa wasn't real all the time, I didn't believe them (my parents worked hard to make me believe in Santa growing up). At that age most kids will believe their parents over kids at school, at least I did. I'm going to try not to worry about that part. I'm actually more worried my kid will be very informed in the reproduction process, and spill those beans!
 

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We are not religious, but we celebrate Christmas. We are big on Christmas around here. We will spend Christmas Eve with relatives, then come home where the kids are allowed to open one gift before bed. Santa will come during the night while they sleep and the kids will get to see what he left for them in the morning. This is how it was done when I was a kid and I have such good memories of Christmas that I have continued the tradition. It's not all about gifts for us though. It's everything - the decorations, the music, movies, giving to others, the whole spirit of the season. We love it all.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Alohamelly, I'd do something like that, but the logistics jsut don't work in my situation. Oh well, I think I have a pretty decent solution.
 

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We celebrate both Christian and Jewish holidays as me and DH are christian but my family is Jewish. We will explain Santa as St Nicholas, and the thoughts and feelings behind santa. Love, generosity, caring and all that jazz, just not at a chubby man in a red suit that climbs down a chimney to leave gifts.
 

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As a second time mom who is non-religious I can tell you what we do now with DS and it will be the same with this next child. He knew there was no Santa right from the begining. I could NOT lie to my child for any reason. I found it extremely painful to find out from that my parents had lied to me in my younger years. He's totally cool with it and likes having the "secret" from his friends. We do exchange gifts but he is the most unmaterialistic kid I have ever met. When you ask him what he would like for Christmas he doesn't even know. As far as actually celebrating the day we rotate holidays between DH's and my family. My family got Thanksgiving, DH's will get Christmas. I refuse to truck all over to all the families and be exhausted at the end of the day. We do Christmas morning as just the 3 of us, 4 of us when baby comes.
 

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We celebrate the Solstice and Xmas with the family.

We plan to tell LO's about the "Legend" of Santa, but not that he is a real person.

We are undecided whether or not to homeschool, so I don't know if we will have to tell him to keep it a secret for his friends. I kind of think that if parent's are going to "lie" to their kids, they have to realize the consequences of it.
 

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What we do is similar to Melly.

My mom signs all the gifts to us (from her) as from Santa and I love it.
We do full-on Santa and I have no qualms about it.

DH and I are Christians, though not practicing, but we do talk about what Christmas is and about Jesus,etc, so my kids also get that part of it as well.
 

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As a mom of a 2.5 year old this is our first year of really tackling the Santa issue, so for any of you first time moms you have a few years before you have to really think about this


Ditto Chely on the spirit and symbolism of Santa, but not that he is real. When I found out Santa wasn't real I was really super bummed... not because he wasn't real but because my parents made such a big charade of the whole thing. I'm sure it was really fun for them (although my mom remembers it as being exhausting) but I couldn't help but feel a fool when I found out and I never want my son to feel like we had fun at his expense. That's just ME though
My brother and sil do full Santa with their kids and we live right next door, so the whole thing will be verrrrry interesting as the years go on I think.... I've asked my mom not to address gifts (if any) to our son from Santa. I, personally, find it offensive.
 

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We are Christians and celebrate Christmas. To us it is more about Jesus, but we do gifts and decorations and all the jazz. My boys know about Santa and they know he is just a character, but I think a part of them wants to believe he is real because it just seems so cool to them right now and I let their imaginations run with it. We don't bring out the gifts till after they are sleeping on Christmas Eve. I have noticed it adds to their excitement Christmas morning when they come running out and see all the gifts that are under the tree. Christmas is the fave holiday in our house so we get pretty silly about it
 

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I tell ds that Santa is a fun thing to pretend, and let him take it from there. (ie, if he wants to talk about a list for Santa, or whatever, that's fine. I won't say it's untrue. But I also won't say that Santa is real, and any questions he asks me will be answered honestly. We watch Christmas movies and all that.)
We'll do the same thing with the new baby.

eta- since he knows that Santa is a "fun thing to pretend," when his friends talk about Santa, he joins in the conversation with them. I'm sure the other kids are talking about "Santa is real" where ds is talking about Santa the same way he talks about, for example, Thomas the Train (knowing it's pretend, but it's fun to talk about).
 

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This is kind of difficult because I'm Jewish (but not observant) and DH is a (col)lapsed Catholic-- but big on Christmas. I intend on raising our babies Jewish, which he's fine with, but suddenly he's going on about how next year, we'll need to get a tree and all this jazz. No idea what we're going to end up doing.
 

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My 11yo still believes in Santa, but I don't feel I've ever lied to her about it. She has asked me if he's real and I've told her that he is if she believes he is. That's been good enough for her. I think she's starting to sense that maybe he isn't as real as she thinks he is, but I don't think it will be a problem when she discovers the reality. I wasn't bothered when I found out Santa wasn't real when I was a kid. It really wasn't a big deal in my family and we just carried on as if Santa really existed and it was always fun!
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by Alohamelly View Post
My 11yo still believes in Santa, but I don't feel I've ever lied to her about it. She has asked me if he's real and I've told her that he is if she believes he is. That's been good enough for her. I think she's starting to sense that maybe he isn't as real as she thinks he is, but I don't think it will be a problem when she discovers the reality. I wasn't bothered when I found out Santa wasn't real when I was a kid. It really wasn't a big deal in my family and we just carried on as if Santa really existed and it was always fun!

Ditto. I can't even remember how/when I heard he wasn't. I know I wasn't upset, and none of my siblings were either. And I'm not offended my mom signs gifts to us as "Santa", LOL. I like it, it's fun to us (big adult) kids LOL. It's the whole spirit of Christmas/Santa thing for our family and I love it that way.
:
 

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We were always raised that Santa was the spirit of giving, and that anyone could be "santa"- but that some families believed in the guy in the red suit. My sister was "that kid" who got in trouble for making a little girl cry when she told her that santa didnt' exist.

Kind of weird, but DH and I just had this discussion today. I grew up never believing in the actual person- and he grew up (and raised his kids) to believe in Santa.

We're both preacher's kids, from highly Christian families. Weird, huh?

I thought we were going to have a big disagreement over this but we ended up changing the subject. I mean, why lie to your kids? He remembers being disappointed when he realized Santa wasnt' real. And you want to teach your kids to believe what you say- but what's all this about santa, tooth fairy, easter bunny........

Ughh. Ay carumba!

Hope we come to an agreement on this one!
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by MangoMommy View Post
And I'm not offended my mom signs gifts to us as "Santa", LOL.
:
I guess for me I just find the entire commercialized aspect of Santa offensive. I'm not religious by any stretch, but it does amaze me that the celebration of the birth of Christ, someone who is seen as a savior by many, has spun into this huge "holiday" where people buy buy buy and consume consume consume and go into debt and do it "just because it's fun" isn't more offensive to observant Christians! It's as if it has completely lost the meaning. To me, if really celebrating in the spirit of giving and generosity is what someone is going for then there are a lot of charities who would love the donation of time and resources. To essentially teach that generosity is giving material things because it's fun is, imo, not only not the proper definiton, but pretty offensive.


I really like some of what I've read about how to explain Santa to our kids. I esp like the way MusicLady's family went about it!
 

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strangely, we had part 2 of this one last night.

Soooo, after realizing that there is ZERO way to compromise on this one, he said "I guess we'll just do this one the way you want to." I really just kind of left it at this.

Usually I don't like to just have him say that, but for this one, I'm content to let him come to my way of thinking. There really is no other way for us to have the charade of presents appearing under the tree- we usually celebrate on Christmas Eve and then go somewhere else for Christmas. It involves two different states, and several different families-

How could we explain that Santa comes at different times, etc? Logistically, it just makes sense to do it my way.


And FWIW, many of our presents are signed from Santa but we're all old and we know exactly who brings what (handwriting).

Our other traditions center more around family, and the birth of Christ, and OF COURSE, FOOD! So, santa is a little part.

I like whoever said that their child likes to talk about it like he likes to talk about Thomas the Train.

Goodness, it's good that santa really doesn't exist because there would have been many a Christmas that I would have had a lump of coal in my stocking!
HA!
 
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