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I'm interested in everyone's opinions on this one. I get why you wouldn't want to use "No" all the time, but what about never? What's your personal philosophy regarding this? I'm interested in learning more about Gentle Discipline for as my son gets older. So please, share your experiences and techniques! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/orngbiggrin.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="orange big grin"><br><br>
TIA! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/love.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="love">
 

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I try very hard to not use "no" at all. I try to say, "Not for DD," or "Dangerous! Hurt baby," or "Dirty! Make baby sick," etc. I have blurted out "no" a couple times when DD has gone for something really dangerous. I don't think an occasional "no" is a problem, but I think it's better to give kids a reason why. KWIM?
 

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Well, if my philosophy was to never use the word "no", I'd fail miserably, lol.<br><br>
I do try to really limit saying it though, so it retains its status as a "stop what you're doing and look at mama in surprise" word.<br><br>
What I don't want to do is squelch her natural desire to explore her world. I do want to keep her safe. I think you can achieve this by limiting the word "no", but I don't think you need to remove it from your vocabulary entirely.<br><br>
JMHO.
 

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Dh and I were both very deliberate to not use "no" too often, and we did really well until about 6 months ago. Since just before turning 2, ds has often been way too quick for me to think of anything else besides "no" right at the moment that something's happening - he's about the pour his milk out on the rug, he's about to throw a hard wooden toy at the window, etc. So I feel like I've kinda failed on this lately. I usually follow it up with a quick explanation, but still, it's the first word that pops out lately. It was a lot easier to say different things when he was a baby and moving slower!
 

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IIRC, Susan Striker's book <i>Please Touch</i> came from her experience of not saying, "no" to her son for the first two years of his life. I've read her <i>Young at Art</i> and really enjoyed it, but haven't snagged a copy of this one yet.
 

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We used "stop" and "not for baby" quite often. It is kind of funny, b/c dd says "BOP!!" and puts her hand up (just like we did) when she wants us to stop. I like using stop b/c that's usually what you really mean. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/orngbiggrin.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="orange big grin">
 

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I also used "Stop!" when I really meant it (i.e. DS was headed for something dangerous). If it was something that wouldn't hurt him, but that I didn't want him to get into (tearing books apart, for example), I'd try to redirect him. It worked pretty well, since DS as both an infant and toddler needed constant interaction in order to meet his need to explore.
 
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