[bensgirl1222]

I currently belong to an OB practice that does not support VBAC's. I know of one midwife practice and one OB practice that DOES support VBAC's. Why am I more inclined to just "suck it up" and go for the repeat c/s then switch to a different dr??? Why am I more scared of having a VBAC than another c/s? I am TERRIFIED about trying for a VBAC bc of Horror stories from my girlfriends (horrible tearing, sex hurting for MONTHS after giving birth, etc...) I'm also terrified that if I switch dr's (and FWIW, I really do LOVE my OB) and I end up with another c/s that I will be so disappointed that I made the switch and then ended up with a c/s anyway.

Also, FWIW, I woe up in ful active labor at 4am. got to the hospital at 6am and by 7am I was 7cm dialated. DS's HB dropped into the 50's so they took him.

I guess I'm just wondering why am i so scared? Is it of the unknown of a VBAC?

 

[Gena 22]

Feel like it's unfair of me to answer, since I responded to you on the "Find your tribe" thread, but your post here caught my eye and I can't resist adding my $0.02.

I think there are two things you're afraid of: first, offending / disappointing an OB that you really like. Second, it sounds like your friends are not very VBAC friendly either.

As someone who's jerked CWC around a lot of times, I can say they're pretty OK with it. First, mid-pregnancy, I finally came to the decision that I would leave them for Bay Area Midwifery and asked for them to send my records. THE NEXT DAY I found out I was having twins and got rejected by BAM. So back to CWC. Then a couple months later, I asked for my records again, which I took to a homebirth MW. Then I went back to them PP for annual care and my IUD. I did have a very brief conversation with DR. Penn about my HB, it's been cool and everyone's been very nice.

Thing is, women change providers all the time during pregnancy. No, OBs aren't thrilled, but they've seen it and are more understanding than you'd think. Go on an informational interview before committing to someone new, if you can. And read online about other women's experiences. You have someone you like, if you get enough info it's win - win, either you stay with the Dr.s you're happy with, or find someone who's a better fit.

As for your friends, they are a small sample size. Read some positive VBAC stories, and look up the research. If you make up your mind about how you want your birth to go, your friends will be less of a problem.

You have some time, think it over and good luck!

 

[murphysaangel]

I have a LOT of fear too, so please don't think you're alone there. But my c-section was awful, horrible, traumatizing, and I had a very long and difficult recovery period marked with high grade fevers and infections which landed me BACK in the hospital, so a repeat c-section is scarier, to me. I'm sure that you could find a whole lot more horror stories about c-sec's than you could about vaginal births. Personally I'd much rather have a tear "down there" than an incision into my abdomen, through major organs, and requiring a large needle in my spine. It certainly doesn't take away from the (sometimes, for me) irrational fears of letting my body do what it was designed to do. What I did was a TON of research. ICAN is a great place to start. Also www.childbirthconnection.org.

And yeah, the "unknown" is very, very scary. It's like I almost don't want to make the mistake of trusting my body again because look what happened last time. The one thing that got me was on the childbirth connecions website - it said to ask yourself these questions:

* If you decided on VBAC and it ended with another cesarean, would you feel better for having tried or worse because you went through labor only to have another c-section?

* If you scheduled a cesarean, would you feel relieved that you wouldn't have to labor again or upset because now you would never know what would have happened if you had chosen a VBAC?

* If you planned a VBAC and had one, what would that mean to you?

You'll find your way. It might not hurt to do a consultation with the hcp's in your area that do advocate VBAC's and ask your questions. Most will do this for free.

Good luck!

 

[ShwarmaQueen]

Your first birth attempt is not a great predictor of how your VBAC attempt may go. There are many reasons why his heart rate could have dropped, maybe a position change would have helped?

I know there are women out there who prefer to schedule rcs, but it's just not as safe as the docs would have you believe. Each delivery carries it's own risks...keep researching and you'll get more confident in your ability to birth if that's what you decide to do.

 

[mamatolevi]

sex was a hell of a lot worse after my sections for a lot longer than after my VBA2C. I'll take a few stitches in my vagina that heal in a couple of weeks over another section any day.

maybe one reason you're afraid to switch could be that the dr you're with is "the devil you know." you know what to expect with an rcs. It's why I had my second section. When I switched in my 3rd pregnancy, they didn't even notice I'd left the practice.

Come see us on the ICAN boards and talk about your decision. There's good support here, but more women actively posting on ICAN. You might also find more dr/mw options through your local ICAN community.

have you talked to a doula yet? They can help you make your decision.

 

[meatloafkend]

It's just obvious to me (like the other responders) that you just aren't surrounded by a positive VBAC vibe. If you frequent this forum and seek out people who support VBACs, there is a strong chance your fear would melt away. No matter what you choose, make sure it is your decision and you surround yourself with supportive people (including your doctor).

 

[Sarahstw]

I think maybe the first question you need to ask yourself is if you even want a VBAC at all. From there, the rest of the road gets much clearer.

 

[jwoodbri]

I completely understand. All too well in fact. I ended up opting for the repeat c-section as there weren't any nearby hospitals that supported VBACs. But now I'm due with DC#3 in July and struggle with the same decision only I know more about VBACs now and have found more resources in the area but now I have yet to find anyone who would take me on because I would now be a VBA2C. I wish I had thought about that before.

I really do wish I had done a VBAC last time even though that would have meant that I would have had to leave my OB that I also really liked. Just be aware whatever you choose you might be closing the door on VBACing at a later date. Think about how many children you want as the risks for c-section complications rapidly increase with each c-section. The risk for a VBAC are very small so definitely check out some facts on ICAN like other people have suggested.

And one more thing. My recovery after my second c-section was much more difficult as I then had a toddler to take care of. I wish I had thought that part through as well. It's too bad everything is so much clearer looking backwards!

Good luck with whatever you choose!

 

[bensgirl1222]

Thank you all so much for taking the time to respond. I couldnt sleep at ALL last night. I went to bed around 10pm and woke up at 12am and didnt fall back asleep until 3am bc I was tossing & turning over what to do.

DH is completely supportive of whatever I want to do. So after "sleeping on it" last night and having all day to call around, do some research, etc... I have decided to switch. If I'm going to try for a VBAc I need to do it now bc no one around here supports VBA2C (that I know of). Im actually waiting for my current dr to call me back so I can talk to her about this. I already know she will tell me that they cant do a VBAC so I called the new place and have a "consult" set up already.

Anyway, thank you all so much for the advice & support! It was such a tough decision but I know I owuld have regretted it if I hadnt tried. And, if I end up needing a c/s this time bc of medical reasons then so be it. But at least I owuld have tried.

 

[Xerxella]

I'm glad your making decisions and finding your own peace.

Your story is similar to mine. Why are you scared? Because having a baby is scary! Being a parent is scary! You don't know what to expect. And, you don't want to screw it up. And, it's so easy to just let someone else worry about it. Doc says, "we'll just do the C at 38 weeks and there will be nothing for you to worry about." And, as the doc told my friend, "you recovered fine from the first C, you'll recover fine from this C and every C thereafter. It's no big deal. We do these all the time..."

It's scary to take responsibility for your own health. It's much easier to let someone else worry. But, no one cares about your health as much as you. And, only you can make the right decisions for you and your baby.