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I interviewed dh. He said he sees his dad when he looks in the mirror. Also that he doesn't catogorize himself as a race. His parents treated everyone of all races as equals growing up. He did mention a stigma to being German after the war but never feeling like that was something he was personally responsible for, since it happened before he was born. I asked his parents years ago since they were alive during the haulocost, why didn't they do anything to stop it. They said, honest to God, here in America, they just didn't know it was going on. DH doesn't ever remember being teased as a child about his race. He doesn't ever feel like people look at him and catogorize him.

I was shocked! I mean who doesn't feel catogorized by other people? He doesn't notice people ever catogorizing our kids even though they have a varied racial look and people try to catogorize them all the time when they are with me. I'm Spanish, English, Irish, Lithuanian, and Swedish. I am olived skinned with brown hair and brown eyes. I get confused looks like people are trying to figure my country of origin out all the time. It bother's some so much, they just have to come up and ask. Then looking at my kids sends their curiosity over the edge, even the most tenative just can't seem to help themselves with the questions. If they see both my dh and I together, they marvel at how we can have one spanish looking kid, one blonde haired blue eyed kid, a brown haired girl with green eyes and two very pale white brown haired and brown eyed kids. I have been rudely asked many times if they all have the same Father (they do).

11 years ago, dh's Dad made racial comment about our son. DH said that is just the way his Dad is that he makes comment noting people's flaws (WHAT???) and that's just the way he is. He called our son chico and wan. He kept on and on. My son doesn't like his grandpa at all. I was outraged and asked my husband to make him stop saying those things. My son has this Grandpa's name as his middle name and he has changed his middle name to nothing, he hates the name but I don't know if it has anything to do with the comments or if he just doesn't like the name. He used to wear long pants and shirts in the summer to cover his skin. His sister told him that the darker your skin was, the more of a sinner you were. She said she learned it in Sunday school, but I'm sure they didn't teach her that in Sunday School.

I never felt as much racial flack until our son was born with browner skin than ds or I, though. Before that, I think people looked at me as white. And now I see that some of this is racism i would have got if I wasn't so fair skinned. When my chinese accupunturist can't get over it, I think it just must be because all her family on both sides in china must look very much alike, but lately to everyone else, the quissical racial questions about our families origins are becoming annoying.

My stepfather was a racist. He was named Robert E. Lee after the Confederate General and he pretty much fit the name, he was a racist, hateful, evil person.
 
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