[melaniewb]

I have a very free-spirited child, which is typically not a problem at all. However, there are times when he needs limits, and I'm not sure how to set them. I'll give a couple of examples.

1. He LOVES to play outside. But, he just doesn't know how far he is allowed to go. My son doesn't care about swings or slides or anything, but just likes to explore and walk around outside, be it in our yard or at the park. So, he will always wander down toward the street or over in the neighbor's yard. Or, in the park, he will wander to the edge of the park and still want to keep going. I am always right behind him, and I will try to steer him in a different direction, but he's very resistant. He gets very mad if I try to get him to go another way, or if I just pick him up and take him in another direction. How can I set limits in this situation so that he can enjoy walking around, yet we don't have to have a huge tantrum when he is getting close to the street and has to turn around?

2. Another scenario... I had to go to the Dr the other day and DS just wants to run all around the office, wherever he pleases. I don't mind letting him explore, as long as he isn't in anyone's way, and he comes with me once we are called. Yet, of course, he just wants to wander and not follow me.

So, how do I go about setting boundaries or limits for him that he can understand? He's 18 months, BTW.

Thanks.

 

[melaniewb]

*sigh*

Can't ANYONE help me?

PLEASE

 

[lovebugmama]

I wish I could, but I'm going through this same stage right now. DS is almost 17 mos. and just wants to do whatever he wants. It's usually OK at home b/c everything is kid friendly, but when we are out it's becoming a real challenge. I get tired of saying no (and he doesn't even "hear" it) and redirecting just doesn't really work any more.

I'm interested to see what those with more experience have to say.

Sorry, not much help, but I'm right there with you!

 

[mom2lyndsey]

Quote:

Originally Posted by melaniewb I have a very free-spirited child, which is typically not a problem at all. However, there are times when he needs limits, and I'm not sure how to set them.

BTDT. My free-spirited sprite is now 3 1/2. It's gotten better (and worse).

I have 2 different discipline lines. First, if it's something that is a saftey issue I will use the phrase "right now". Something like "Lyndsey, right now, I want you over here". There is no second chance on this one. If she isn't following instruction I go to her and physically take over. Second, if it's something that she needs to do but is not a saftey issue she gets 3 verbal statements. "Lyndsey, you need to pick up your toys", Lyndsey, the toys need to be picked up", then we get to "Do you need me to help you because if I have to pick up the toys they will be put up where you can't have them for a day". I always follow thru. If something has to "go away" I'm prepared for the crying. I quietly remind her it was her choice to not put them away.

When we are out and she has trouble leaving someplace, I remind her that if she can't leave without a fuss we will not be going back. When we go out I am always prepared to pick her up and take her to the car.

Things are getting better. Expectations of good behavior are better explained at the beginning rather than tried to be enforced at the end.

That's my thoughts/actions for what they're worth.

Lyndsey's mom

: