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Is it okay to be nude in front of each other?

  • It's okay to be nude and let him in my bed nude with me nude too.

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  • It's okay to be nude around the house, but not to let him into my bed.

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Discussion Starter · #1 · (Edited)
I'm a 30 year old divorced mom of a 9 year old boy. We are very comfortable with nudity, and we are often naked around the house. Personally, I think this creates a healthy view of the human body.

I sleep nude, and my child also sleeps nude in his bedroom. Sometimes during the night, after a bad dream for example, he comes into my bedroom and crawls into my bed where we are both sleeping nude.

I spoke with my counselour and did some research on the internet, the general concensus I found is that nudity is not an issue unless either the parent or the child becomes uncomfortable, which has never been the case. Some said that when the time comes, the child will create this privacy boundary himself. Others disagree and say that it is the job of the parent to determine that.

Recently, I heard from another psychotherpist that this can be detrimental to the sexual health of my child. His argument is that he may be conflating his emerging sexuality with my nude body, and as a result, he may feel feelings of shame that can cause sexuality issues - such as becoming conflicted or abstemious. I've also heard the argument that if it were a male with a 9 year old daughter, that would not be okay.

Clearly there are contradicting opinions. I am on the liberal side of things, but want to make sure I am not creating an issue for my child without knowing.

So far, my boy doesn't seem interested in girls (or boys for that matter), although he is pretty mature for his age - like a 12 year old. He also has some separation anxiety.

Please advise.
 

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Nudity between YOU and you're 9-year-old boy is fine as long as both are fully comfortable. But, it's important to set some ground rules. Just like, put on clothing when other people are around since guests may not be comfortable with it and be firm and stick to it. Always, keep in mind that everyone is comfortable with nudity😏
 

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I think you know your child’s needs the best. Plus you’ve consulted with some professional opinions. There will always be contradictions and opinions that differ even among the professional community. Take what seems best to you plus the needs of your son and likely it will meet wherever he’s at. Not too mention this might not be a long term thing either.
I’ve had this happen a few times myself and there’s never been any obvious negative about it. I would say though if either you or him becomes uncomfortable with it, stop.
 

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Being nude is not an issue but he may be thought whe world is just like you and may cause some difficulties when he teen aged. So put some clothes when needed to make him comfortable/
 

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My son is 21. We were the same kind of family as the OP-- one mom, one son. We did the same. I have always slept nude. He did, too, or sometimes he wore nightshirts, and we co-slept for years (that started slowing down around age 7 or 8) but I forgot when he stopped crawling into my bed nude. Maybe 9?
He is a perfectly well adjusted young adult, sexually and otherwise, though he is quirky like his mama :giggle: I am pretty sure he doesn't sleep nude anymore. He's been out on his own, with roommates, for a year, but prior to that, I believe he was sleeping in fuzzy pants and a T-shirt, or a nightshirt.
He knew other people might think it was weird (or wrong), though neither of us thought so. We kind of just knew not to talk about that outside the house, as other people have other ideas about what's appropriate. And often stick their noses into other folx' business.
But the takeaway to my response is, we did that, and he turned out fine.
HTH.
 
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