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Should I push to birth at home?

961 Views 9 Replies 7 Participants Last post by  Pigpen
I am planning on having my third dc the same place I had my 2 nd.

I am lucky enough to be very close to the sole independant birth center in Ohio!! I love the practice and had a lovely experience at the birth center last time. Check it out if you want: Jackie was profiled in Mothering, actually, a couple yrs ago.

Anyway, I think I'd really prefer to do a homebirth for a variety of reasons, mostly related to convenience. My dh prefers the birth center, largely bc its easier to explain to ppl I think...

Is it worth making an issue of this? What can I expect (besides no travel) to be different at home?
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Typically, whatever a midwife brings to home is what they have available in a freestanding birth center. State to state regs differ, though, so you may have to verify this.

I like homebirth vs. birth center birth simply because you don't have to travel in labor, you can move freely around your own surroundings, you get tucked into your own bed, and you don't have to pack up your newborn in a carseat for a trip home soon after birth.

For some women, though, the birth center provides a certain amount of security (although it's perceived, usually) when they're not ready to birth at home. For others, their home is not a comfortable place. Maybe they live far, far from a hospital, etc. Perhaps they live with other people.

It's so personal, but I tell you that if you're desiring a homebirth, nothing can compare.

Does your mw do homebirths?
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she explains things so well!

With my first, I would have loved to birth at a birth center, but that wasn't an option. For me, birthing at home was kind of taking a personal leap of faith. And I'm SOOO glad that I did! I loved being able to labor at my own house, in my neighborhood, in my bed, shower, etc. Very nice! Only thing my house doesn't have is a huge jacuzzi tub. Don't even have a tub I fit in anymore! But we compromised with a pool in the living room, and it was so comfy!

If HB is something you're comfortable with and you have a great mw to be with you, then I think it's definitely the way to go!!
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Ease of explanation to others doesn't seem like a very good reason to me. The bottom line is, where would YOU feel most comfortable giving birth? Where does your gut tell you to have your baby? It is perfectly safe to have a baby in your own home. It's great that you have an independent birthing center nearby in case you need it.
I think you can expect it to be different from in your home in the same way *anything* would be different. Imagine doing any sort of activity there -- having dinner, say, or hanging out with friends, having an intimate discussion with your husband, or reading a book, or working on a piece of art, or just being. In what same sense is it different in all those situations, and does it matter to you?

If it does matter, think how much more it will matter if you are there during such an important, special time of your life.
Its such a hard decision for me!

I feel 100% comfortable in the birth center, and am not sure whether I would feel as comfy at home.

-we don't have the jacuzzi.

-we live in a multi-family home with neighbors below and above.
-its a small aptment, and I suppose I might disturb ppl/ my older dc.
-dh feels like the BC is a better choice (less scary for him and his family- this does count for me, as I am not interested in putting aside his feelings for something that may not mean as much to me as it does to some.)

Last time I arrived at the BC very late in labor (pushing) and would hate to repeat that... It would be much simpler to have everyone here with the kids than to find someone to come stay with them if god forbid baby arrives in the wee hours...

Both options feel equally comfortable for me...I need a compelling thought to help me decide.
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Jacuzzis are nice. I wonder if they can be rented?

I also live in a small apartment in a multi-family house. When I was yelling, I thought I was probably disturbing the entire neighborhood, but it turns out I wasn't really yelling as loud as I thought I was, and even the guy who lives in the apartment right next to ours in the same building didn't hear me (he saw me later and said, "oh, you have a baby!")

If you don't want your older dc present for the birth, s/he can be sent to the home of friends/family when you go into labor.

I really feel that the most important thing is what's best for you and baby, not what makes other people comfortable. This is one time when it really is appropriate to just think about yourself and your baby, not worry about pleasing others. You are the one who has to do this. You are the one who is going to be most affected by the location. I hope this doesn't sound like I am dismissing your concerns about how other people feel (it does help to have your partner supporting you!), I just personally feel that other considerations take priority.

I can't resist the opportunity to promote homebirth:

-it is statistically the safest

-you don't have to drive somewhere during labor (and the simple act of changing location during labor can interfere with the body's natural rhythm)

-you are much less likely to have medical interventions if the equipment and technology isn't right there handy - if you plan to stay at home, then you will only transport to where the equipment and technology is if you truly need it

-you are immune to the germs in your own home, and your baby will be, too

-giving birth is a lot like making love - a lot of the hormones involved are the same - birth is facilitated by low light, quiet, not being observed, and being in a familiar place - you need to be somewhere where you can feel free to lose your inhibitions and strip naked if you feel like it - birth is a very primal, very sensual, some say sexual, thing - where do you feel comfortable making love?

-you have the home court advantage - you are definitely the one in charge - it is your home, your rules, your birth, your baby

This is just the beginning of a long long list of the advantages of homebirth. You might consider reading some of the following books:

_Ina MayÕs Guide to Childbirth_ by Ina May Gaskin
_Special Delivery_ by Rahima Baldwin Dancy
_Birth at Home_ by Sheila Kitzinger
_The Home Birth Book_ by Charlotte and Fred Ward
_Birth Your Way_ by Sheila Kitzinger
_The Natural Pregnancy Book_ by Aviva Jill Romm
_Birthing From Within_
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I feel 100% comfortable in the birth center, and am not sure whether I would feel as comfy at home.
I think this really says it all. As much as I would like everyone on the planet to birth at home, it really comes down to where you would be most comfortable.

I agree that your husband's comfort counts too. You may be able to talk him into a homebirth, but if he is very worried during your birth he won't be doing you any favors.

OTH, you could end up having a fantastic homebirth and decide you could never do it any other way. That's what happened to me!

I know, I'm so helpful...Go with your gut. It won't steer you wrong.

peace, Beth
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Yeah, but then she said

Originally posted by calandal'smom
Both options feel equally comfortable for me...I need a compelling thought to help me decide.
Which is why I went ahead and pushed homebirth.
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My first birth was at Best Start Birth Center in San Diego. It was perfect, midwives were everything and more. My only complaint was that I had to travel to and from, that's a biggie for me. Nothing like having to sit, seatbelted in a car while having contractions. Also, after the birth...what you want to do is rest with your baby, maybe even sleep. Where would you be more at ease? At the birth center you know it's not home(although it's the closest thing to it). For my second, we stayed home, had a beautiful water birth and didn't have to think about packing up to go.
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