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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
For the last two months or so, we've had pretty consistent nap and bedtimes. Usually: up at 5:30, nap from 8:30-10:00, nap from 1:30-3:30, bed at 6:30. Those are approximate, but give you a general sense. I started getting consistent b/c of the talk of needing consistency and b/c nighttime sleep has gotten progressively worse. For the past 3 months, ds wakes up for 1-3 hours almost every single night. He's not playing- just seems to wake up fully and not be able to go back down. So I thought routine might help. Hasn't seemed to. And he's now waking about every 2 hrs with the up for 1-2 hours thrown in, usually 2:00-4:00 am or so.

Yesterday he took a late afternoon nap: 3:00-4:45. I went out with friends to dinner (amazing!!!) and came home to a sleeping baby at 9:30. Turns out that he went to bed around 8:45. Thing is, he woke every 3 hours last night then up at 6:15. Those were nursing wakings, not the "I'm awake and can't go back to sleep." This was amazing, so much better than normal.

So now I'm wondering if the routine I've got should go out the window. Maybe I'm expecting him to sleep for too long? Maybe I should just relax and go with the flow? Or maybe last night was just the fluke that happens every week or two?

What do you all think from your experience?

Oh yes, the vital stats: ds is 6.5 mos, has 8 teeth, sitting up, and lurching (almost crawling)
 

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Naps are totally not consistent here.

Bedtime, for a L-O-N-G time was 7 pm sharp, but he's been majorly fussy in the past week or so. Teething + milestones + goodness knows what else. I'm hoping we'll get back to the 7 pm routine sooner or later!
 

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We also just go with whatever. I found that when I worried too much, all the sleep seemed worse. I've recently returned to work
and I thought a nap routine would help grandma, who is watching him. But we've found that ds does what he wants! If he is getting up at night, it may be too much sleep, but who knows. Keep trusting your instincts!!
 

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I used to be pretty consistant with dd but I'm not anymore. I realized that it was stressing me out too much when something didn't go "just right." Now I just go with the flow. It is soooooo much less stressful and I haven't noticed a difference in nights to tell the truth.
 

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Our routines are consistent, but times are totally dependent upon how tired she is and how late she slept before.

But when she started doing what your little one is, we moved her bedtime back to later, and that helped a lot. Turns out our little one is a nightowl, and she has for over a year now gone to sleep between 9-10pm nearly every night. And she sleeps 11-12 hours each night. She typically goes down for her first nap 2-3 hours after waking in the morning, and though she's not taking a second nap anymore, when she did it was usually around 3 hours I think after waking from her first nap.

Some babies do better with early bedtimes. Some better with late. And just when you think you've got it figured out, their sleep patterns and needs will change. I think being flexible with times, but fairly consistent with routines has been a wonderful thing for us. So if she goes to sleep at 9, wakes at 9, and naps from 11am to 1pm, then that's a normal day. But so is going to sleep at 10pm, waking at 8:30, and napping from 10-11am.


But I'm a SAHM so my schedule allows me to be very flexible. Were I dealing with a job and daycare, we'd likely be less flexible about schedules. But until she starts school, I'm fine with letting her needs dictate the times for sleep. Because in my mind, so long as everyone's safe, happy, and getting sleep, that's what counts.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Hmmm... this is helpful. Thanks. Nighten, your statement about having consistency and routines based on when she wakes helps. Did your dd sleep for 11-12 hrs before you moved her bedtime later or did that happen with the shift?

I guess I'm asking two different questions: one about consistency and the other about how much nighttime sleep. DS doesn't sleep for 11-12 hrs straight through the night (and when I say straight through I mean with wakings that don't require an hour or two to get back to sleep). He has that awake period. I guess I'm trying to figure out if he just sleeps less at night (like 9 hrs) therefore I should put him to bed later (or be willing to wake up super early) or if I should continue to try to eliminate that hour or two he's awake in the middle of the night. Hope that makes sense.

Agh... Feeling very confused and frustrated...
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by fastyfeet View Post
Hmmm... this is helpful. Thanks. Nighten, your statement about having consistency and routines based on when she wakes helps. Did your dd sleep for 11-12 hrs before you moved her bedtime later or did that happen with the shift?

I guess I'm asking two different questions: one about consistency and the other about how much nighttime sleep. DS doesn't sleep for 11-12 hrs straight through the night (and when I say straight through I mean with wakings that don't require an hour or two to get back to sleep). He has that awake period. I guess I'm trying to figure out if he just sleeps less at night (like 9 hrs) therefore I should put him to bed later (or be willing to wake up super early) or if I should continue to try to eliminate that hour or two he's awake in the middle of the night. Hope that makes sense.

Agh... Feeling very confused and frustrated...
The 11-12 hours "straight" usually include one or two stirrings now that will nearly always end up with her latching on and us both going back to sleep. When we moved her bedtime earlier, she started waking up in the midddle of the night and it was really hard to get her back to sleep. That was when having the bedtime routine helped a lot though. I'd work my way backwards through the routine trying to get her back to sleep. So since our routine is:

Bath/diaper/PJs
Quiet play
Reading books
Lights out
Sing bedtime song (and if need be to settle her further, walking around quietly pacing, holding her and reciting her favorite book or singing softly)
Nurse in glider to sleep
Nurse in bed

(Though we'll skip the bath or play if she's obviously very tired.)

When she'd stir, we'd start with nurse in bed, then if that didn't work after about 15 minutes or so (maybe longer -- depending on how tired I was/am) we'd move to the glider, then walk around in the dark quietly singing bedtime song, and the LAST thing we'd try is turning on a small light and reading/quiet play.

We never left the bedroom though as it's our designated sleep area and the rest of the house is the play area pretty much, so leaving the room resulted in her waking up fully -- and us giving in to it. It was exhausting.

So maybe try moving the bedtime a little later, and establish a routine that works well for you -- and is something you can lean on for middle of the night wakings, to keep her in the sleep mode, if possible.

Another thing that helped was doublestuffing her diaper so we didn't need to change it in the middle of the night. Are you still changing the dipe in the middle of the night? Would that help maybe?

I feel for you -- I really do. And once you get it all figured out, teething hits or a mobility milestone or something else, that interrupts the sleep pattern.

For us, teething has been the biggest culprit, and when it's going on full force, I keep a bottle of Hylands next to the bed and give her some tablets when she stirs. Also giving her infant Motrin before bed, with some gripe water for tummy issues (since motrin can upset their tum a little) also helps. But that's a personal decision, absolutely. I don't mess around with pain and decided early on that it was worth it to give her medication from time to time if it helped her sleep better when she was in pain.

PM me if you need more info or want more help, as I don't always remember to check this forum. You're not alone. And I know how much this sucks. And I hope that some of the suggestions in this thread help you find a way so you andd your little one both are getting more sleep!

 
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