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I'm about to get out of the military and go to school full time. I'm going to be making a lot less than I did before. The way I figure it, unless I qualify for welfare, I will only be able to survive if I start getting child support from XH. I'm hoping to get a job that will let me work 12 hour shifts three days a week, but that would prevent me from taking a couple of classes I need for grad school because they meet on one of the days I'd work. If I don't get this job, I'll have to pay for full-time daycare AND a babysitter 3 hours a night 4-5 times a week, or DS would have to spend weeks with his dad and weekends with me, and I'd never see him because I'd work both days on the weekends.

I'm lucky because I'm moving in with BF, so he'll be able to help out, plus XH is still around to watch DS for me sometimes. If I didn't have that, I don't know what I'd do. I know there are some other single mamas out there who are going to school - how do you handle things?
 

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I am on welfare and there is full time daycare through that program. You can choose someone you know to watch the kids and they pay for it or a daycare. Also colleges have daycare on campus and this is usually based on your income level. On my campus i get free daycare. I scheduled everything around my older three being in school. I do classes while they are in school and the younger two are with me or in the on campus daycare. I get all my school work done while everyone is in school and on the weekends i devote 2-3 hours on study time and the rest on the kids. I do not have an ex or a bf to help. Also i get student grants and loans to help with living expenses and although it isn't much it does help. I live in low income apartments and am extremely frugal. We don't even have furniture right now.
 

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Ok, this might not be the best time to reply to this post (it's been a really bad day), but here goes. I am extremely tired and stressed out all of the time. I recieve no child care assistance because I recieve child support (
and right now have no one to watch dd on Thursdays so I am scrambling to find someone. If you have help, you are lucky and should be able to do ok. The main concerns I think are finding child care for actual class time, having a computer (expensive) or access to one, and being able to pay all of your bills. At teh very least, you can do homework while your kids sleep. If you can do work-study at your school, I would do it. I did that last year and aside from the extra money it gave me, it worked around my school schedule and gave me a chance to interact with other adults. Honestly, I wish I had a boyfriend who I could live with or an ex who was helpful. You have a support system, which is huge.You should do fine. Good luck!
 

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Wow, I think their are at least 2 other mamas here today trying to make this work. I wonder if you are close enough to hook up?
Seriously, though, I was very lucky to make it through law school as a single mom, and I did it mostly by falling very deeply into debt. If I had to do it over again, I would try to hook up wih another single mom to exchange child care. Since you have housing, you won't need to find someone to share, but that's another way to cut down expenses. Good luck, you can do it.
 

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i work 2 part-time jobs (and will be starting a 3rd next week). i usually try to work my schedule around my dd's school and my ds's preschool but this semester i was forced to take 2 night classes. luckily my mom and my boyfriend help out w/ the kids. most of my professors have been very cool about letting me take the kiddos to class on the occasion where i have no other options. this semester i'm only taking 12 hrs so things are actually more mellow (though i still feel like i never stop moving). the last few semesters i was taking 18 hrs and bartending till crazy hours. i decided to sacrifice the good money for sleep and more time w/ the kids. i'm having a hard time making ends meet but will hopefully make do.
 

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I moved back in with my parents. For someone who moved to the opposite side of the country at 16 just to get away from them, this has been stressful. However, they're not dangerous people & kiddo has a healthy relationship with them. They're semi-retired so they watch her while I'm in class. We homeschool the rest of the time. I study while she has free play time & I stay up later than her to study. My parents also live a few months of the year with my sister out west. Then a local homeschool teen babysitting cooperative watches kiddo during my afternoon/early evening classes & kiddo comes with me to the morning classes.

Since I can't sell my car because I owe too much more than it's worth for the bank to release the title & the insurance company won't cancel the policy until it's sold, my necessary payments out are more than the rental income I make from the tenants occupying my home. I don't get child support. I supposed to, but he works under the table from one state to the next. My parents are helping me scrape by but I'm on various payment plans that I can't meet on my own without their help. It sucks. Big time. I feel like a failure a lot of the time. Today was one of those days I spent too much time crying over it. But, I'm thankful for the support I have because without it our lives would be so much more difficult & depressing. I can only afford college because of grants + loans + scholarship. If I could go part time then I could find a job, but I can't go part time because then I'd lose the scholarship. I can't quit because then I'd have to play back the loans
: My parents are selling their house & downsizing. They've promised to help get me out of my vehicle loan so I can just use public transportation for college & loan my mom's car for kiddo's homeschool groups.
 

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First, have faith in yourself. You can do it. You will since you know what is at stake for you and your children -- the future.

Second, talk to your professors about the situation. Go to their office hours and get to know them a little and be up front (but not the sob story type). Let them know you're returning to school as a single parent and could use some tips on prioritizing/strategies for being really efficient. If you've been out of school awhile, it takes some time to get back into the swing of things and it is doubly difficult with kids. If you're honest and seek their guidance, they will more than likely be helpful. Some will even give you some respect for what you're trying to do and will point you in the direction of extra help via their contacts on campus.

Third, good luck.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by gassadi View Post
talk to your professors about the situation. Go to their office hours and get to know them a little and be up front (but not the sob story type) . . . If you're honest and seek their guidance, they will more than likely be helpful. Some will even give you some respect for what you're trying to do and will point you in the direction of extra help via their contacts on campus.
So true!
 
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