Single mommy-to-be

Thats what I've done. It wasn't very hard considering ds father wasn't exactly wanting to have a baby anyway, and he took off when I told him I was pregnant. I could have found him, gone through lawyers etc to *make* him be involved in some way, but I decided against it. Why would I want someone who had no interest in my baby to be around him?
I decided that if ds father wanted to be involved with ds, he was the one who had to make the effort to make it happen.
Ds hasn't asked about his 'dad' yet, and I don't bring it up voluntarily, but when he does ask (and I'm pretty sure it will happen) I'll be honest, I'm not going to pretend he doesn't have a dad at all, but I'm not going to let him think that his 'dad' didn't want him - how I'll do that, I'm not entirely sure right now, but hopefully I'll have some inspiration when the time comes

Thank you! All of you! I have a lawyer if I need one, and the "daddy" already knows this child will not be given his last name. Are there other precautions I should take? I don't want to tell the dad he can have nothing to do with this baby but I will say that there is no way I will give him any opportunity to take away my darling. Beside that I have already made the decision that "daddy" will not know where the child is in daycare while I'm in class nor will I drive down to him if he wants to see the baby. (I live a good 48 miles from him) I have no doubt in my mind that if it came to a court battle, I would win... I have been the one who has done everything finacially and otherwise. It has been my family (my mom and sister are so excited for me!!) that has made it so I don't even think I'll need a baby shower. I liked the idea the poster gave about not lying to the little one if the question comes up but not volunteering info either. If any of you wonderful ladies have any more advice on legal thoughts I should take I am grateful for the help!

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if you don't add him to the bc from what i'm aware of he has no legal rights. he would have to go to court and get a court order for a dna test (or your agreement that he is the father) in order to get any *fatherly* rights. and if he wanted to take your precious away he would have to prove you unfit. hth's

I read your post before but didn't have time then to respond.

Keep repeating to yourself "I CAN do this". I knew in my heart
that I was going to be doing this alone. Even if my ex was playing
supportive. I was alone the majority of my pregnancy and those
hormones can take you from super girl to miserable failure in seconds.
It's okay, cry it out and come here and vent.

I didn't wish to ignore him but he made it harder and harder, and then
for the sake of my health I had cut ties in my fifth month. I asked for
no contact until baby was born.

I didn't put his name onto the BC. I gave him all the information on
how to get it taken care of and left it up to him. It never happened.
The only thing that bothers me about this is that when I received dd's
BC in the mail it lists no mother as well.

You can certainly just walk away. If that is what your heart is telling
you to do then you have all rights to follow it. Just know that when
your child is born he might jump into daddy action and step in. If
that happens just try to keep it fair and unemotional (not that easy
I know). Many men really freak about pregnancy. It's not 100%
certain that his actions now predict how he will act as a parent.

My dd asks questions from time to time about "daddy". She had
some contact with him up until age 4(will be 6 in june). But most
important is that she has unbelievably loving male and female
role models. She is loved. She KNOWS she is loved. My dd
has a view of her world and she is lacking nothing. When people
have made Dad comments she speaks up about not having one
with the same emotion that a child would say they don't have a bike.
When she refers to her parents she means myself and my Father
who has taken a HUGE role in my dd's life.

I do fear for when she might wake up to Daddy existing and his
choice not to be a part of her life. BUT I feel that as long as a child
feels safe and secure in their life and what they do have that it won't
hurt as much by what they don't have.

My best friend gave me advice about this once. She was raised
by her mother who had addiction problems, and only met her dad
a handful of times. She said "I never wondered why my dad didn't
love me, I wondered why nobody loved me".

All I know is not only can it be done, it can be done beautifully.
I love my small family. It's hard, but so so worth it. BEST of luck
and love to you.