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My partner and I have been together for a while, and expecting our first child together. I have 3 other children from a previous marriage, he has none.

My eldest daughter is at boarding school, and so not in the family home, and my middle child lives with her father abroad. Essentially, it's our youngest as an only child with occasional visits from the eldest.

My partner is extremely hands-on with our youngest, inpart due to complications with the pregnancy, he has become her primary caregiver. (I've had extended stays in hospital and for months have been on bedrest).

In saying this, they have a very close and loving relationship. He adores her, and she adores him.

Her father, because he lives abroad can't be as involved in her life, but they keep in touch via facetime and he sends her things on a regular basis.

However, Miss 6, has become quite possessive of her stepdad, to the point, I've started noticing her purposely excluding me. A few examples would be, I suggested we play a game together, the three of us. She picked a game, then proceeded to tell me it was a two-player game only, and her and my partner were going to play together. Last night, at storytime, which I have always been a part of, excluding times when I've been in hospital or sick, she said that she wanted my partner to read the story to her, and that I should stay in my room. She then proceeded to kiss me goodnight, and then went to her room.

We do have a loving relationship, and always lots of hugs and kisses, and communication.

I would have expected that she would be possessive of me, not the other way around. I have explained to her that it hurts my feelings when she excludes me and that's not a nice way to be, but I'm really unsure how to proceed.

If my partner or I are having a cuddle, or spending time together, she'll try to get in the middle of it, and complain that "I hog him".... she won't even allow me to make her breakfast or snacks anymore, if he is there.

Anyone else experienced this before?
 

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I have not experienced this before, but based on what you wrote, I do have a suspicion as to why it's happening.

She's been the baby of the family her whole life. Now she isn't going to be. She's going to have to share, and you are probably excited about the new baby. And you aren't as available due to the pregnancy complications.

I suspect she may be feeling some jealousy and exclusion from your situation. She may be latching on her stepdad as a way to get the extra attention she's craving.
 

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I have read it's fairly common for kids to have favourite parents and switch back and forth at times. I wouldn't worry too much about it and enjoy having a little time off to focus on the pregnancy.
 

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I haven't experienced this first hand either, but I bet she's also nervous on some level because she knows that the baby is his "real" child and she is staking her claim, being as close to him as possible, etc. Of course, you and DH know that he is going to love both kids and that nothing will change that, but maybe she is looking for a little extra closeness and reassurance that this man, who is essentially her father figure in daily life, is still "hers" even when he becomes someone else's actual daddy.
 
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