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One of my students pointed out today that I was fat. I mean, yeah, I am fat. Yeah, he is little. Normally when my students notice that I am fat, it doesn't phase me. I mean, it is true. I think I just had a crappy day overall so this sort of sent me over the edge.<br><br>
But right now I feel like the fattest person on the planet. And I am so depressed. But I refuse to eat to dull the emotion, so I am just sitting here feeling it!<br><br>
I always just shove food in to my mouth to dull any emotional pain, so I am wondering how long am I going to feel bad? I already cried about it. Now I am just sort of feeling sad. And sleepy. Is that normal? To feel really tired when your feelings get hurt?
 

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And you know, grown ups call me fat all the time <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> And that hurts too, but this hurt worse for some reason. Maybe because I love him and so it hurt more? I am such a brat! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/eyesroll.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="roll">
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"> Someone at work the other day (a patient - I work in emergency medicine) asked me if I was pregnant. I'm a bit overweight, but I DO have this horrible post c-section stomach that just won't seem to go away.<br><br>
I kind of laughed and turned it into a joke, but it hurt really bad. I try to be all 'rah, rah - I am mother/woman, hear me roar' but the truth is that it still makes me cry to look at my body and see what's happened to me.<br><br>
Anyway, to the point of your question - I absolutely do feel tired after I've had a big cry. Any kind of big output of emotion makes me feel worn out and tired. And good for you re: not filling the pain with food. I'm still learning how to NOT do that.<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Bunnyflakes</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/15407606"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I always just shove food in to my mouth to dull any emotional pain, so I am wondering how long am I going to feel bad? I already cried about it. Now I am just sort of feeling sad. And sleepy. Is that normal? To feel really tired when your feelings get hurt?</div>
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It's normal. I find the most helpful thing for it is to do some serious self care...a short walk in the fresh air, or a scented bath, or a bit of yoga, or whatever floats your boat. Then, if it's late enough in the day, I go to bed. Tomorrow is another day.<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Bunnyflakes</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/15407614"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">And you know, grown ups call me fat all the time <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> And that hurts too, but this hurt worse for some reason. Maybe because I love him and so it hurt more? I am such a brat! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/eyesroll.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="roll"></div>
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Maybe it's because it's easy to "consider the source" when there's some degree of malice involved (and let's face it - in <i>most</i> circumstances, when an adult calls us "fat", it's not meant nicely), but when it's just an honest observation from a child, it slips under our guard?<br><br>
I'm sorry you're having such a bad day, Bunnyflakes. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"><br><br>
Sending love your way, I'm struggling to stay away from the emotional eating as well (particularly this week). Lately to deal with things I've been exercising.. So it may be 10:00 at night but I'm working out because if I don't I'm going to go eat anything I can find. I didn't realize how bad it was until recently <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"><br><br>
I don't remember how to deal with "life" without resorting to food.
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> I know just how you feel. It hurts so much sometimes and food does help, at least in the short term.<br><br>
I am gradually learning to treat myself in other ways. I don't have brilliant advice, but I just wanted you to know that you are not alone.
 

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I'm so so very proud of you for not going to the food. I'm trying to learn not to do that too. Perhaps indulge in another way? The last time i was very uspet and didn't want to eat myself better, I went to our local walmart, and walked around until I found something I wanted to spend exactly one dollar on. (nail polish.)
 

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Hugs hugs hugs!!!<br><br>
I am so sorry you had such a hard day! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"><br><br>
I am always super exhausted after I have been really hurt and had a good cry.<br><br>
Lately it seems like I am alot more sensitive than I used to be too. All day today my little boy kept saying "I don't like you mommy" and it was really, really hurting me. I know he loves me. I know he does. But it still really hurts. So yeah, I think hearing those things from a small person that we love so much..it just tears you up inside. Not only that, they always seem to point out the things that we are the most worried or self conscious about.<br><br>
I hope tomorrow is a much much better day!
 

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Maybe this will cheer you up a bit: <a href="http://fatnutritionist.com/" target="_blank">http://fatnutritionist.com/</a>
 

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I know how you feel <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> My DS called me "tubby" once and then was baffled when I burst into tears.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Apple Girl</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/15408549"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">You should read "Women, Food, & God" by Geneen Roth.</div>
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I just sent her that book. She is reading it. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/winky.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Wink">
 

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This could be a turning point for you. A way of turning the (-) into a (+). It is huge that you cried and you felt sad and you didn't try to dull your pain by eating.<br><br>
Give yourself permission to FEEL. And if you feel sleepy, take a nap. Listen to your body. FEEL.<br><br>
You can handle it.<br><br><br><br><br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Bunnyflakes</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/15407606"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">One of my students pointed out today that I was fat. I mean, yeah, I am fat. Yeah, he is little. Normally when my students notice that I am fat, it doesn't phase me. I mean, it is true. I think I just had a crappy day overall so this sort of sent me over the edge.<br><br>
But right now I feel like the fattest person on the planet. And I am so depressed. But I refuse to eat to dull the emotion, so I am just sitting here feeling it!<br><br>
I always just shove food in to my mouth to dull any emotional pain, so I am wondering how long am I going to feel bad? I already cried about it. Now I am just sort of feeling sad. And sleepy. Is that normal? To feel really tired when your feelings get hurt?</div>
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Discussion Starter #16
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>A&A</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/15408852"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I just sent her that book. She is reading it. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/winky.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Wink"></div>
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Almost done too <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> I keep rereading each chapter so it is taking a long time <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"><br><br>
I slept forever last night and I enjoyed it. I am feeling better today <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"><br><br>
Bunnyflakes, that was hard to hear. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"> Not exactly the same, but similar--I went on a field trip with DC's class lasat week, and one of the kids thought I was DC's grandmother. I laughed it off, but it really hurt. I know it was just some kid saying it, but I felt like the oldest & ugliest person on the planet. It didn't help that another chaperone mom was 27 (her daughter announced it). I suppose that technically, I COULD be DC's grandmother, but I didn't know it showed.<br><br>
Hope you are feeling better.
 

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Just wanted to offer hugs <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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Crying usually takes a lot out of me. Words can hurt and it doesn't matter the age, even if it's the truth. Example: You look pregnant - this from DH. Gee Thanks I just had a baby three months ago so that's awesome.
 

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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>QueeTheBean</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/15409442"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"><br><br>
Bunnyflakes, that was hard to hear. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"> Not exactly the same, but similar--I went on a field trip with DC's class lasat week, and one of the kids thought I was DC's grandmother. I laughed it off, but it really hurt. I know it was just some kid saying it, but I felt like the oldest & ugliest person on the planet. <b>It didn't help that another chaperone mom was 27 (her daughter announced it)</b>. I suppose that technically, I COULD be DC's grandmother, but I didn't know it showed.<br><br>
Hope you are feeling better.</div>
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You never know, maybe that mom was embarrassed by having people know how young she is, ya know? I had ds young (but not *that* young- pregnant at 18, delivered at 19). Couple that with looking younger than I really am and I've had some rude comments and looks. People assume I'm the babysitter or older sister. I actually had one of the mom's at the daycare I work at shocked this week when she found out I had a 6 year old son. Her reaction was "no way.... you don't look a day over 18". I'll take that as a compliment, but I'm quite a bit older than 18 <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1"> (I'm 26... which she was shocked to hear).<br><br>
BTW- ds's grandma (my mom) looks young (and is young!) and has a child younger than my ds (she has a 7 year old and a 3 year old). She could easily pass as my ds's mom instead of grandma! You just never really can tell the age by how a person looks.
 
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