[rainbowmoon]

I am exhausted reading about some folk's homeschool groups and outside activities. are they truly necessary? do you think some HS families overschedule their kids?

DD & DS are starting suzuki violin this fall with a dear friend. (DC will be 2 and 3 yo at this point) we likly join the homeschool group too. but I only plan on attending a couple times month. (it's a 2 hour roundtrip drive but I would like to meet other HS families in our area) otherwise I don't see us doing many more classes until they are older and can choose for themselves.

am I missing something here? if the whole socialization arguement is a crock why so many classes? I thought the point to HS was to school at HOME. does anyone NOT do any extra outside classes?

(disclaimer- not trying to offend anyone here at all, just honestly wondering!)

 

[arlecchina]

I dont do all those, IMO a lot of people fall victim to the whole "oh my kids need all this enrichment I never got! they need dancekarateswimmingbaseballartmusicdramasoccer lalala everything!!!" and even homeschoolers arent immune to this

they're well intentioned. I dont think it is for socialisation so much as a worry that their children will miss out on something(s).

 

[UUMom]

My hsers have inerests & passions (music, sports, art), so they follow them. We are home sometimes, not home other times. I could stay home 24/7 myself.

Staying home isn't the reason we hs, however. Having freedom to do what we want is why we homeschool. That and the really cool private school we love starts at 17k a yr for Kindergarten.

:

 

[melissel]

1) Because my DD is very social, and would be bored out of her gourd at home all the time.

2) I never developed any hobbies or special skills in life, because my parents never thought classes of any kind were necessary (or maybe they were waiting for me to ask? but I never had any kind of exposure, so I didn't know what to ask for!), and I really wish I had. Basically, I read or watch TV. I want my DDs to be a little more rounded than that.

3) Actually, I DO think socialization is important. I think it's VERY important. I just don't think it has to be done the way it's done in traditional schools.

That's my take.

 

[rainbowmoon]

I totally see you are coming from. that makes a bit more sense to me.. thanks! it;s hard for me to understand some things yet as my kiddos are so little still (but I am definitly set on HS!

)

the last thing I want to do is overschedule my kids. I see it so much with others and it makes my heart hurt in a way.

 

[melissel]

Quote:

Originally Posted by arlecchina I dont do all those, IMO a lot of people fall victim to the whole "oh my kids need all this enrichment I never got! they need dancekarateswimmingbaseballartmusicdramasoccer lalala everything!!!" and even homeschoolers arent immune to this they're well intentioned. I dont think it is for socialisation so much as a worry that their children will miss out on something(s).

We posted at the same time. I don't think my kids need enrichment I never had. I want to offer them the exposure and opportunities I never had. How do you know what you might love doing unless you try it out?

 

[ColwynsMommy]

We don't do any classes, never have. But we get together with other kids a few times a week, either for one-on-one playdates or in a big playgroup.

At the younger ages, I don't think classes are necessary. But as the kids get older, I know there will be some things that I won't be able to teach, either because I don't know how to do it, don't have the interest, or don't have the equipment.

I think socialization is important, but I don't think classes/school are really conducive to socialization. I think playing and accompanying me around town is much more important.

We don't homeschool to be at home, we homeschool so we can do things the way we want, and to be together. We're not home all the time, but we're always together.

 

[Chinese Pistache]

Quote:

Originally Posted by melissel 1) Because my DD is very social, and would be bored out of her gourd at home all the time. 2) I never developed any hobbies or special skills in life, because my parents never thought classes of any kind were necessary (or maybe they were waiting for me to ask? but I never had any kind of exposure, so I didn't know what to ask for!), and I really wish I had. Basically, I read or watch TV. I want my DDs to be a little more rounded than that. 3) Actually, I DO think socialization is important. I think it's VERY important. I just don't think it has to be done the way it's done in traditional schools. That's my take.

Are you me?

Actually, when I posted my "list" in the other thread, I didn't mean that they would *all* be doing them *all* of the time. Ds will do tennis and violin during the whole year. But he will play soccer in the fall, and he will do science camp for one week. Dd 1 will do dance and also fall soccer, and dd2 will do a mom-and-me gymnastics class at the rec center for 6 wks. That doesn't feel like a lot to me.

 

[UnschoolnMa]

We are not really into activities, particularly the scheduled kind, but occasionally we go there. The kids do classes & activities they want to do. Dd is the most social of our family, but she mostly prefers to go places with her best friend. Other than that we do community events mostly. The last "class" anyone took was guitar for Ds and that was a year ago. Ds isn't a big social guy, but he's getting ready to get a job and that will be quite the jump in his social scene. He's half excited (mostly about making money lol) and half irritated already.

Quote:

Staying home isn't the reason we hs, however. Having freedom to do what we want is why we homeschool.

That's true for us as well. Freedom up to and including the freedom to stay home or go out whenever we like.

 

[melissel]

Quote:

Originally Posted by rainbowmoon the last thing I want to do is overschedule my kids. I see it so much with others and it makes my heart hurt in a way.

I hear you. But without traditional school in the picture, we'll have SOOOO much more free time, and I love that. That means we'll have time to actually DO those other things that make life rich, instead of having to pack it all into the evenings and weekends. I'm really looking forward to that! (Well, that and not having to fight over getting up and dressed every morning

)

 

[wonderwahine]

I think its good to be around other people doing the same thing you do for moral support and the feeling of acceptance. Just like bf moms seek our LLL groups.

I don't want to overschedule either, but I will let ds follow his interests if we can fit it in the schedule and afford it.

 

[UUMom]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chinese Pistache Are you me? Actually, when I posted my "list" in the other thread, I didn't mean that they would *all* be doing them *all* of the time. Ds will do tennis and violin during the whole year. But he will play soccer in the fall, and he will do science camp for one week. Dd 1 will do dance and also fall soccer, and dd2 will do a mom-and-me gymnastics class at the rec center for 6 wks. That doesn't feel like a lot to me.

What my children ask to do also doesn't feel like a lot at all. It feels just right, and one of my kids would love even more. I appreciate they have the freedom to do the things they enjoy without any pressure.

My 8 yr old is doing 2 hours of soccer a day this week. She's ready and raring to go. She wants it to go on all summer, but it doesn't. So 10 hours of soccer camp for a whole summer seems way too little for her, kwim? She also take 3 hours of tennis a week- for 6 weeks, and 10 hours of sailing lessons spread out over 4 weeks. Not nearly enough, in her opinion. And also in her oprion, what better place to be in summer but on and in the water?

She is begging me fora week of 3 hour a day pony camp, and art camp. I signed her up for 3 art session, over 3 weeks, at 2 hours a session and she wants to also do the water workshop and the advanced clay workshop. I would, but the other kids have to be driven somewhere as well.

All in all, it's not too much by any stretch of her imagination. Summer around here (a summer beach colony kind of community with lots of fun summer things nearby) is brief, but wonderful.

 

[kymholly]

Quote:

Originally Posted by melissel 1) Because my DD is very social, and would be bored out of her gourd at home all the time. 2) I never developed any hobbies or special skills in life, because my parents never thought classes of any kind were necessary (or maybe they were waiting for me to ask? but I never had any kind of exposure, so I didn't know what to ask for!), and I really wish I had. Basically, I read or watch TV. I want my DDs to be a little more rounded than that. 3) Actually, I DO think socialization is important. I think it's VERY important. I just don't think it has to be done the way it's done in traditional schools. That's my take.

Exactly!

I also think that it's important to note that when *most* people talk about overscheduling children, they are referring to kids who go to school. So, to have those kids running around after school every day pursuing all of these other activities on top of spending 8+ hours a day of school/homework/travel is pretty overwhelming. For hsers, we can adjust our "school" day to accomodate whatever other activities that we have going on that day so that our kids aren't overscheduled.

 

[incorrigible]

the point of homeschool is to not go to an institutionalized school. The only reason it's called "home" school is because people that send their kids to be trapped in a building all day can't grasp that a kid doesn't have to be trapped in a building all day.

Homeschoolers that overschedule their kids do it for the same reasons that every other kind of parents do it. Some might do it for their kids to spend social time with other kids, some feel that their kids need extracurricular activities to be well rounded, some want to encourage their kids to follow their dreams, some do it because it's fun, some have other reasons all together.

Personally, we do different activities for different reasons. Ds has scouts. I signed him up soon after his dad left. I tried Big Brothers first, but they had a 2-3 year long waiting list. Ds was having serious issues and really NEEDED some male rolemodeling in his life, and there are just none availible. Scouts has been a great character building activity, and one of the best things in his life. That has nothing to do with what kind of school he goes to. He does enjoy the other boys, and has made his best friend in scouts...so there is social benefit, but that's not why we go. His buddy is so busy with all his activities that he's rarely at scouts. His buddy goes to ps, btw. We've been trying to schedule a sleepover or some time for the boys to hang out for a month and his next possible free time is July 5, right now.

Ds is also just starting boxing. This is because he likes to try new things. My sister sets aside an "entertainment" budget for the kids each month. For ds it goes to classes. He tries one sport after another until it isn't fun anymore (usually cause he gets good enough that the teachers/coaches start putting lots of pressure on him). He just left figure skating and is on to boxing. He gets along well with the other kids, but hasn't made any long term friends in any of his sports. He has plenty of friends around the neighborhood already.

Dd doesn't do organized activities right now. They cause unmanageable stress for her. We go to one time only classes or city events, that kind of thing. We have a YMCA membership so I can take her to play a variety of sports or swim whenever we like. We try to go once a week. There have yet to be any other children in the building when we're there, though...so it pretty clearly is because we like to get out of the house and do stuff, and not for social reasons.

I guess I don't see how homeschoolers doing the same thing everyone else does makes it any different than when everyone else does it...

 

[oceanbaby]

I haven't read the replies, but for us it's because my ds loves them. I don't do them because I feel he needs them to be socialized, but because he is such a social kid that he really enjoys working in group settings that the classes provide, something I can't do at home. He would actually really love school if it was part-time and optional attendance. As soon as that kind of school opens we are signing up! But until then we just piece it together with all sorts of classes.

I just picked him up from a day camp and he was asking if he could stay longer, telling me that I interrupted his Lego project. I personally find the classes exhausting because I have ds2 to contend with. Most are about an hour or so - too short to go home and come back, so I have to find a way to entertain ds2 in the immediate area. If it was up to me, we would be involved in less classes, but ds1 just can't get enough.

 

[Curious]

Homeschool holds an image, I find, of mother and child huddled at kitchen table grunting over a workbook, with no social contacts.

When I explain to inquirers that homeschool means simply, based out of the home, their image shifts.

That said, I don't enroll Dd, age nearly 6, in any outside formal activities and her life is VERY full. We are doing waldorf so I'm forced to pick up all sorts of new skills. We have a group that meets every other week and tries to meet on the off weeks for crafts and cooking and talk just because we Mamas click so well.

Dd lives our family life, full of kitchen and garden adventures, helping Mama and Dad at work, meeting people we meet. The extension of AP is that the baby who came everywhere in a sling is a child who can come most anywhere and be welcome because she's used to traveling with parents and being a part of things. Once relatives meet Dd, they NEVER ask another worried question about her social development.

We did have someone leave our homeschool group who we liked very much. It was sad to see her go but I think she went to a group that was much larger and had many more activities. Her kids were enrolled in another activity the same day so she often came to our group and had to leave in time to get to the next place. So maybe she left us in order to reduce her outside activites. She never said.

The nice thing about homeschool is You can make it suit You. If someone feels their kids and family benefit from many outside activities, they are free to do so, while someone like me sticks closer to home.

The only thing I wonder about in allowing others their freedom, is do parents UNDERESTIMATE their ability to educate their children, and send them out for that reason. If that's the case, I'd suggest reading Better Late than Early, and Rudolf Steiner's work on what characteristcs make an ideal teacher for small children (in brief, an 'enthusiastic amateur), and rethink their opinion of their abilities.

 

[Chinese Pistache]

Quote:

Originally Posted by melissel I hear you. But without traditional school in the picture, we'll have SOOOO much more free time, and I love that. That means we'll have time to actually DO those other things that make life rich, instead of having to pack it all into the evenings and weekends. I'm really looking forward to that! (Well, that and not having to fight over getting up and dressed every morning )

Yes!

We would love to participate in our "extra-curriculars" no matter what, but with hsing, I don't have to rush around after school shoving snacks at the kids in the car as we race across town for a lesson and then, arrive home late to make a tired kid do his homework, eat some semblance of a dinner and take a bath before going to bed at 9 or 10 at night.

:

 

[rainbowmoon]

thanks for all the insight. I really appreciate it. maybe I am confusing the reason people do classes to the whole socialization arguement. need to think more about this!

 

[frogguruami]

We do a co-op a couple times a month and I host Chess Club at my house twice a month but that is the only group "class-like" things we do. My boys are 6 and 8.

 

[rainbowmoon]

chinesepistache- I just saw your other thread right now about classes. I didn't want you to think I started this thread because of it though as I didn't read it until just now!

total coincidence and I had been wondering about this for awhile!