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Wow, so this just happened in my office about 10 minutes ago. I sit in a back office that I share with one other woman, you have to go through our office to go to the supply closet. We were discussing the Iparty incident and BF laws. BTW, my DS is 14 mo. The following is the dialogue that occured:<br><br>
Me & A: Discussing NIP<br>
C: Why would you want to NIP uncovered anyway?<br>
Me: Because my child is hungry<br>
C: But why wouldn't you want to cover up his head?<br>
Me: Because he would NEVER tolerate that<br>
C: Well, I just don't know....you know the other thing I think is a bit extreme is when people nurse beyond a year, I think at that point it's just getting a little bit silly.<br>
Me: OK (I would normally start to spout information about BF but had to shut up so I didn't start a fight and lose my job)<br><br>
--My office mate walks to the front of the office<br>
--Two minutes later C walks back in to my office (you guessing that someone reminded her of my DS's age??)<br><br>
C: I <i>just</i> remembered that your DS is older than one year, I hope I didn't offend you (VERY half-heartedly)<br>
Me: That's ok C, this is a very hot topic and everyone is entitled to their opinion, I just rest assured in the knowledge that I'm giving my child the best start to life that I feel I can. (Saying this as she has already turned to walk out the door)<br><br>
I want to EXPLODE!!! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/Cuss.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="cuss"> I meant what I said, she is entitled to her opinion but she inserted herself in someone else's conversation!!!! It's not like I invited her to join in and asked her what she thought about the topic. How would you mommas have handled this situation? I got so flustered that I kind of clammed up and tried to keep the peace. I wish I could have thought more quickly of a way to diplomatically give her the facts.
 

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Eh, how will people learn if they are afraid to ask? Kudos to her for apologizing (and to you for keeping your job <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">).
 

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Discussion Starter #3
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>TigerTail</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7950984"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Eh, how will people learn if they are afraid to ask? Kudos to her for apologizing (and to you for keeping your job <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">).</div>
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<br>
I totally see your point, people will never know the truth if they don't ask! What upset me was the unsolicited criticism about extended breastfeeding.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>turtlewomyn</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7952488"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I think next time C is eating something you should go up and throw a blanket over her head.</div>
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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"><br><br>
Great mental picture! Thanks!
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>turtlewomyn</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7952488"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I think next time C is eating something you should go up and throw a blanket over her head.</div>
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Exactly!<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">
 

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Discussion Starter #7
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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>turtlewomyn</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7952488"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I think next time C is eating something you should go up and throw a blanket over her head.</div>
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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> I love that idea...I'll let you know how that goes <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/mischievous.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="mischief">
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>turtlewomyn</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7952488"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I think next time C is eating something you should go up and throw a blanket over her head.</div>
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Actually.... on a serious note if you do see her eating I would ask her if she wants a blanket to cover her head. She will probably look at you like you are crazy. Say "Well, that's how my son sees it too." smile and just walk away. I wouldn't be snarky, just polite and sweet. It may just give her something to think about.
 

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I think you dealt with it the best you could under the circumstances, without giving an inch. I say good on you. Sometimes just not crawling under a rock is the best type of daily activism!
 

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Anonymously mail her the extended breastfeeding information from kellymom. Actually, you know what, give someone you know in another state your work address, have them send it to her, that way it's not coming from the same area you live in and it will look anonymous, lol.
 

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Does this woman have babies or is she pregnant? If the answer to both is "no," then it's probably not worth wasting too much of your time at the moment. People come to information when they need it, and shoving at her right now may ultimately backfire. I don't see anything wrong with offering to provide her with information *if she's interested,* but sending it anonymously (like she wouldn't know where it came from) is a passive-aggressive way to make your point and may not be well received. Something quick like, "You may start thinking differently when you start planning to have children, I'd be happy to talk to you about BFing and NIP when that time comes."
 

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I think it is really important for us to find ways to share information without being confrontational or rude. It is hard when people say thoughtless or stupid things, but it is a great skill to cultivate.<br><br>
Re: extended breastfeeding comment - I have said in response to questions such as "nursing past X is weird"<br><br>
"Yeah, before I had kids, I used to think similarly. I never would have predicted that I would find myself tandem nursing a toddler and a preschooler! " (with a big smile)<br><br>
Usually shocks people into silence.<br><br>
A recent example I am proud of - A friend of my dads (she is in her 80s) asked me the other day "when did you stop nursing?" I told her that I was still nursing.<br><br>
She looked really surprised and a bit concerned, so I continued, "Did you know that for every year I nurse, my risk of both breast and ovarian cancer goes down? Heck if it gets rid of my risk of cancer, I am nursing until my youngest is 20! " (my mom, a good friend of this woman's, died of ovarian cancer and had breast cancer twice - and this woman also has had cancer in her history).<br><br>
Siobhan
 
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