Mothering Forum banner

21 - 40 of 57 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
26 Posts
Discussion Starter #21
Aw, I new I was coming to the right place for encouragement in this department. I'm also homeschooling my oldest(5 1/2) so I'm getting used to the "No school today?" comments. I am one of four and my husband is one of 6 and I always loved it. We'll see what happens, thanks for the laughs. Some of you were talking about manicures, I actually got one a few weeks back. It felt so weird to be there, I kept thinking"I've got better things to do than this!" Well, the manicure lasted exactly 12 hours and that was that. We love to spend our free time AND vacations with our kids too.<br>
Going against the grain, Jeannine
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
743 Posts
I totally understand what you ladies are saying. We have 5 kiddos and we get all sorts of comments all the time and at times it gets very, very annoying. I especially like the hands full comments, those are great. We are TTC #6 right now and I still here slack from my mother about having so many kiddos, I do not understand why people just don't mind their own business.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
119 Posts
<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Slingin'Momto4</strong></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I totally understand what you ladies are saying. We have 5 kiddos and we get all sorts of comments all the time and at times it gets very, very annoying. I especially like the hands full comments, those are great. We are TTC #6 right now and I still here slack from my mother about having so many kiddos, I do not understand why people just don't mind their own business.</div>
</td>
</tr></table></div>
<br>
Hey there Jules! I can't wait for the birth story of #6 so get to conceiving that baby! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/winky.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Wink">
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
612 Posts
I read this thread because we're hoping for four or five. I noticed several posters commenting on the "you've got your hand's full" line that seems so popular. I get that every time I run errands and I only have two kids! I think people are just trying to think of something to say.<br><br>
I don't know why so many people feel the need to comment on having more than two kids. It's not like it's an unpopular choice. I know several families with 3+ children.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
71 Posts
We have 3 kids also and are wanting at least one more. But down here in the south, bigger families are the norm. We live in post housing in 4 bedroom houses, so it's pretty common to see families with 3 or 4 children. But I also know several families with 5-7 kids. I think it's awesome! And people just don't understand that you grow with each child. People with 1 child can't imagine having 5--well, you probably won't have 5 at one time! You have 1 or 2 at a time and you adapt. Before you know it, you're having a big family too!!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
36 Posts
I just turned 39 and have a 21, 19 & 15 yr old daughters and a 21 month old son! I used to think there was no way I'd have a 4th child but then we were blessed with our son & am now trying to have our 5th. I feel extremely blessed to have been blessed with a second family but everyone thinks we are nuts. I'm always hearing about how much more money we'd have if I was working, how we could of been "free" in a couple of years (like being a parent majically ends when they turn 18! LOL!) and how I'm wasting my degree by staying home but I think I'm doing the greatest job there is and he'll be grown before we know it. Sure we'd have more money and wouldn't have to worry about shut-off notices but my son is a great gift and I'm hoping we can be so blessed with one more. I also don't tell anyone that we are trying because I get tired of hearing their [email protected]*$ and I think its our business if we have any more. I love being a mom and being with my children. I also get flack about nursing my son, not having him circumcised, him sleeping with us, the list goes on and on. I just think they all need to tend to their own lives and quite worrying about mine so much.<br><br><br><br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/signcirc1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="sign circ"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/bftoddler.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="bftoddler">: <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/familybed1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Familybed1">
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,648 Posts
I like the "Don't you know how that happens?" comments. None of mine are in school yet, so we all go out together on errands. People can be so rude at the grocery store. My responses now include, "Yes, and I'm good at it." and "Yes, and it's so fun!" Usually shuts them up. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
634 Posts
My dh wants 6 kids. Before we were married he would joke how he wanted 5 boys and a girl. Basketball team and a cheerleader...lol Well we had our 3rd girl Jan 1st.<br>
I keep saying we are done for a LONG time because I too am homeschooling and I have thyroid issues and chronic fatigue and 3 kids is so hard. Yikes I can't imagine going for 6. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/bouncy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="bouncy"><br><br>
But I guess we will see. I too hate the comment "wow you got your hands full" <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/irked.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="irked">:<br><br>
Its all good, I guess we will see where life takes us
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
5,362 Posts
I am one of three, and have three. You get the same comments "you ARE done now, right?" and "were you trying??" when you are pregnant with the third so I can only imagine with the fourth...<br><br>
I never got too upset by comments though. I knew I wanted three; I didn't need the majority of people at Safeway to back my decision.<br><br>
And the "you've got your hands full" (my dd1 and dd2 were 6 and 2 when dd3 was born) comments never were offensive to me at all. I DO have my hands full! I don't think it is an insult. I took it as a compliment - that I was wrangling three little kids and still managing to get things done (though not always in the most efficient or appropriate way but hey...)<br><br>
And honestly, I had previously been a bit judgmental (in my own head) of large families. Then I became good friends with a woman who was the fourth of five kids. She is the MOST amazing, fun, funny, interesting, intelligent woman! What if her parents had stopped at two kids? It really changed my thinking about larger families.<br><br>
It could be compared to that (is it George Carlin?) comedy routine that says anyone who drives slower than you is a moron and anyone who drives faster than you is a maniac. I am not big in favor of only children or families too big to fit in my Suburban - but that is my own choice for me. Others can make their choices and I should be supportive; they know their lives better than I do!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,207 Posts
Wow, people are SO rude! I am only pregnant with my first, so I am still getting all positive comments. However, we want another sibling fairly close to the first one so I am sure I will get the "don't you know how it works" comments too. My aunt said that to me about my sister when she got pregnant with her second. WTF?<br><br>
Honestly, I think some people are jealous when they see a large happy family. They are overwhelmed with 1 or 2 and don't see how you all can have 4 and still be sane and functioning, let alone the great parents you are!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
6,920 Posts
<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lurk.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lurk">:
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
70 Posts
I am amazed at all the comments now that we have 3! We have a 4.5 yr, 2 yr, and 2 mo. Just today some stranger walks by me as I'm getting a cart and said, "boy you have your hands full." It's not like I was pulling my hair out screaming at my kids, babe was sleeping and the boys were holding hands standing next to me. It's amazing what pepole think they can say. Oh well! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br>
Danna
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
338 Posts
My mother's response to rude people back in the baby bust 70's (had 7 kids) was that she was making sure she was supporting the Social Security System. Need lots of worker bees for that to keep working <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/bouncy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="bouncy">
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3 Posts
Sorry that you've had rude comments! We have 6 kids at present and would dearly love more if we are so *blessed*. Personally, I've had very little in the rude comments department, but I know some people deal with such comments by responding either with a pithy remark or simply smile and indicate you are pleased with your family.<br><br>
I emphasized blessed above, as we have known a number of people through the years that have desperately wanted children/another child but were unable to conceive...<br><br>
My recommendation is to enjoy and care for the children you have, and to eagerly await the arrival of your next!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2 Posts
I know what you mean. I could pay for the college education of all three of my kids with the comments about having my hands full and now I get them when I am just out with the two younger ones. My boys are 5, 3, & 8 months. We have been talking about a fourth but my husband needs to get moving on expanding the house first. After the last pregnancy, I do not want us to be in the middle of extensive renovations when I'm pregnant (Dh didn't have the boys room completed until after I had the third).<br><br>
Here is an additional thought in regards to the benefits of more kids: They will have people to depend on and seek comfort from when bad things happen. I'm one of six and I don't know how I would have handled the deaths of either of my parents (thankfully we were all adults when we lost them). My father passed away 4 months before my wedding and then my mother 7 years later after an extended illness. We all took turns looking after mom until the end. It would have been really exhausting if I were an only child.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
77 Posts
<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/nut.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="nut"><br>
...when I was pregnant with my third baby people made comments like "pregnant again?" AGAIN? there's 10 and a half years between my second and third!! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"><br>
and someone saying to me don't you have like a ton of kids now? yeah 3 is a ton! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/nut.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="nut"> I'm so crazy for having 3 kids in 36 years...<br><br>
***I think loving attentive attachment mammas like us should have <b>more</b> kids...give the next generation a fighting chance!!.. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1 Posts
I think my favorite is the comedian --"you know what causes that, right?" or the downright rude--"Four! You're not going to have any more are you?" My favorite answer is "it's no big deal, I stopped counting after two anyway!". I have always felt six was my number for some reason and while I'm very happy with 4, I just don't feel finished yet. I'm in no hurry though. I think a lot of families miss out by not understanding that it actually gets easier when you have more kids as everyone helps out, they entertain each other and mom is generally calmer and much more experienced. You'll know when you're done and until then just remind them that they are SO right, mothering a lot of kids IS best left to the experts.<br><br>
Good luck with yours!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
365 Posts
I would love to have 4 or 5. I have said to my sister in law that I want 5 and she keeps saying "just wait until you have two you will change your mind". It makes me so mad when she says that. We are two different type of people. She gets so stressed with two ( and another one on the way). I don't know how she will handle three she can't take care of her two.<br><br>
I just really want a big family. I want to have lots of laughs and love around my house. My DH wanted 10 so we decided to have 5 of our our and sponsor 5 kids.<br><br>
I think is will be great having a big family.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
178 Posts
Wow! I'm so happy I happened to notice the title of this thread as the most recent - I don't venture into this forum these days since my own #4 is just 2 months old! Ours are almost 12, just turned 4, just turned 2, and 2 months.<br><br>
I, too, absolutely love my chaos and non-stop busy schedule (well, most of the time, lol!), and I really don't mind any of the inevitable comments - I can just shrug them off pretty easily. I do get my fair share of "oh, you finally got your princess, now you can stop" comments, since #4 is the first girl of the bunch - ok, those are just the teensiest bit annoying! I also kind of like "having my hands full" - life is certainly never dull, and I know my kids will always have each other. I do, however, wish I had more "company" in having a larger family - I sometimes feel as though I dare not share one iota of any *hint* of stress in my life, so that I don't get that "well, you certainly asked for/deserve it" vibe, if that makes sense!<br><br>
So cool to see so many others out there!
 
21 - 40 of 57 Posts
Top