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My sister was commenting today about my son learning to go to the toilet. He is 20 months and has been consistant during the day for about a week. She thinks this is way ahead for his age (I read it's is normal) She said boys normally don't train until they are 2 1/2 - 3 years. Then not two minutes later "If he's old enough to go to the toilet he's too old to nurse."

We are supposed to punish our babies when they reach milestones! I don't get the big deal. I look at my baby and he is still a baby!

April

Nursing my toddler everywhere I go!
 

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People are so helpful sometimes.
My mom was able to resist making that particular connection when my son potty-trained (around 22 months), but after his second birthday, it was like he had crossed the magical line between being young enough to nurse, and too old.
Now, when he asks to nurse in front of her, she'll sometimes say, "Oh...you don't want to nurse...you're a big boy!" It drives me CRAZY. She was totally supportive of him nursing until he turned two, so this came sort of out-of-nowhere, but it drives me nuts.
I usually respond to this talking-to-mommy-though-the-kid-thing by doing it back: "Sam, are you too old to nurse, or is Grams crazy?" Usually, consensus is the latter, majority rules, and we nurse.
 

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I always find it so strange how people associate milestones in this way. A friend of mine was told that if her baby was wearing shoes he was too old. She just took off his shoes!


My ds1 was potty trained for a year before he weaned - I guess I nursed WAY too long!
 

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Weird. Linda has been potty-trained over a year now. I wonder who's going to break the news to her.
 

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No, there is no reason you need to wean just because your toddler is potty learning. Some kids learn to use the potty pretty early in toddlerhood, but some are three years old or more by the time they're fully out of diapers. So does this mean that the child who uses the potty early also needs to wean early? If he were a child who wasn't using the potty until age three, would he only be "too old to nurse" at age three instead of two? Frankly I don't see any relation between the two milestones at all. Maybe the comment is just a reflection of how rare it is for children in our culture to nurse as long as is natural. If someone has never known anyone who nursed their baby past early infancy, it's probably going to seem very strange to them that a child old enough to do "big toddler things" like learn to use a potty would "still" be nursing. But that's just a reflection of our culture, and not of what is anthropologically normal for humans. Would it be helpful to gently point out to your sister the WHO recommendations about nursing until at least age two? (If I remember right it was worded wonderfully. I don't remember it offhand but maybe some other mama here knows a link to it.)

Edited to add: I completely agree about not punishing a child for reaching a milestone! And that is exactly how weaning at potty learning would most likely come across. During any time of change or transition (and meeting a new milestone is definitely a time of change and transition), it's so important to keep as many other things in the environment as possible steady (well, as many as are within your reach), to provide security and to boost a child's confidence! I would think suddenly weaning, for a child who is still very young, during a time when other things are already changing, would not be helpful. You are doing the right thing!
 

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What in the world does potty training have to do with weaning
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To me that is like saying you use to toilet you dont need to eat anymore. It just dosnt make sense.
 

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dd potty learned well before she weaned. What about cultures that do EC? It makes no sense to set arbitrary time limits on nursing, IMO.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by ~Megan~ View Post
dd potty learned well before she weaned. What about cultures that do EC? It makes no sense to set arbitrary time limits on nursing, IMO.
DS has been using the potty since he was 5 mos. With her logic, that would have been one short lived nursing session!

For a comeback, I suppose you could ask if we're supposed to wean at other milestones too- first smile? first tooth? when they start to crawl? I really liked the line from the other thread about "when they're old enough to ask for it, it's time to wean"...one mama replied "if they're still young enough to ask for it, they're young enough to need it"
 
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