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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
... but we have FINALLY reached complete agreement about our HOMEBIRTH!!!<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/jumpers.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="jumpers">:<br><br>
I am so unbelievably excited. DH and I both adore our midwife and he told me last night that he's really pumped about having a homebirth. He said the idea had sounded nice to him from the get-go, but he needed 1) to know that it was safe and we could get to the hospital in a reasonable amount of time 2) be reassured about options for my Group B Strep 3) Make sure our insurance covered enough of the costs (must be a man thing; I was willing to pay the whole fee out of pocket if need be! But he was worried about having enough money to live on after the baby's born...) and 4) find a good midwife. All these obstacles have been overcome and (barring problems) I will have my 4th baby at home!!!<br><br>
Am I too excited about this??
 

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Isn't that the best feeling!?! Definately something to be excited about! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/thumb.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="thumbs up">
 

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right there with you...it makes me happy everyday that i'm homebirthing!!
 

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It IS a great feeling!!!<br><br>
I remember the last time (at 34 weeks<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">) DH and looked at each other and both said "lets try a homebirth!" We were so excited we just smiled for days!
 

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Your DH sounds just like mine. On all of the subjects. Now mine is all abord and wants a student doula so that there are more doulas in the area that have been to a home birth.<br>
He was the same about the finances too, I am fine with paying out of pocket because this is that important to me, but he needed to crunch numbers and see what programs he can use at work to help defray the costs since our insurance won't cover it at all. But now it's all good and we're super excited!
 

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Not at all! You're just the right excited. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/orngbiggrin.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="orange big grin"><br><br>
We're planning a home birth too and when we decided to do it, we felt so happy & excited. Every time I think of it I feel excited - I can't imagine any other option for us.<br><br>
Congrats on your decision & your awesome midwife!!
 

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Talking to the midwife made all the difference to my dh too, he even wants to catch! It's a great feeling and you have every right to be excited...<br><br>
CONGRATULATIONS!!!
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Thanks for being excited with me. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> Dea, I'm glad to hear I'm not the only one whose dh has those "issues". <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> Steph, I really liked your blog! Thanks for sharing.<br><br>
I just hope I'm not setting myself up to be SUPER disappointed if we (God forbid!) have to transfer!
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>miss_honeyb</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/9856168"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
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I just hope I'm not setting myself up to be SUPER disappointed if we (God forbid!) have to transfer!</div>
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I look at it like this- if you start out at home with a midwife if you end up needing to transfer you'll know for SURE that it was necessary and that you did everything possible to give your child and yourself a natural birth experience. Very few homebirths end up as tranfers and those that do are for good reasons. Hospital birth on the other hand, you can start out with the best of intentions, wanting to go natural and end up looking back after having a C-section or epidural thinking "you know if it wasn't for me being nervous and my labor stalling...if it wasn't for this intervention that then caused this complication that caused this intervention, etc I would have had a natural birth" those kinds of things. Having a homebirth is giving it your best shot- some things will always be left to chance, but you can do a lot to ensure a positive birth experience just by planning a homebirth.
 

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HOORAY! This is awesome news. I'm so happy when people can get their homebirth figured out!
 

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It is absolutely something to be excited about!! I am super excited about having a homebirth, I can't wait! I just wish my DH was as on board as yours is, he sounds lovely! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br><br>
I'm with you on the transfer thing. I know my chances are very slim that anything would happen but I would be so darn disappointed! But, like Jen said, you know you did your best and it was actually needed if something were to happen. I just thought this week that I might make a transfer birth plan just in case. Anyone else think about this or do it? It almost feels like a jinks, but I would be really angry if I didn't and baby ended up with Vit K and eye goop, let alone Hep B or something!!
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>sarahn4639</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/9859006"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">It is absolutely something to be excited about!! I am super excited about having a homebirth, I can't wait! I just wish my DH was as on board as yours is, he sounds lovely! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br><br>
I'm with you on the transfer thing. I know my chances are very slim that anything would happen but I would be so darn disappointed! But, like Jen said, you know you did your best and it was actually needed if something were to happen. I just thought this week that I might make a transfer birth plan just in case. Anyone else think about this or do it? It almost feels like a jinks, but I would be really angry if I didn't and baby ended up with Vit K and eye goop, let alone Hep B or something!!</div>
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In the event of an emergency transfer the Dr.s would most likely not even have time or the desire to look over or honor a birth plan. Our plan was (and is again this time) to have dp be the baby's "bodyguard" if we have to go to the hospital. He is to stay with the baby at all times no matter what is going on with me and knows not to let them give any injections, eye goop, bathe the baby, circ him, or do anything else we don't want. I go over this stuff with him a few times to make sure he knows that they might try to do these sorts of things as a matter of "routine" without asking and he may have to jump in and say "NO! Don't do that, what are you about to do? NO we don't consent"
 

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That is true. I figured I'd pretty much make it for the baby rather than labor/birth for me because if we were there it was an emergency and that changes everything. My husband would never do that, he would stay with me, want us to see/be with baby together if something was going on with either of us. We had this conversation with our first who was born in the hospital. Plus he is very non confrontational, especially with people in "authority". Perhaps I could write out a detailed list of do and do not consents for the baby and give it to our doula who would transfer with us if it were to happen. That way she had the "power/authority" to speak for us on baby's behalf, off the sheet.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>LoveChild421</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/9858113"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I look at it like this- if you start out at home with a midwife if you end up needing to transfer you'll know for SURE that it was necessary and that you did everything possible to give your child and yourself a natural birth experience. Very few homebirths end up as tranfers and those that do are for good reasons. Hospital birth on the other hand, you can start out with the best of intentions, wanting to go natural and end up looking back after having a C-section or epidural thinking "you know if it wasn't for me being nervous and my labor stalling...if it wasn't for this intervention that then caused this complication that caused this intervention, etc I would have had a natural birth" those kinds of things. Having a homebirth is giving it your best shot- some things will always be left to chance, but you can do a lot to ensure a positive birth experience just by planning a homebirth.</div>
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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/yeahthat.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="yeah that">: We trust our midwife utterly - I feel fully confident that the ONLY way I'd end up in the hospital is if it were absolutely necessary, which gives me a great feeling of relief!<br><br>
I haven't prepared any kind of transfer plan, either - largely because unfortunately, in NY state, the standard post-birth stuff - Vitamin K shot & eye goop - are required BY LAW (or they report you to the dept of child services or something insane like that). That's part of why we went with a home birth. My current transfer plan is: "Don't transfer." <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br><br>
I think I'll have some clothes/necessities ready in the corner of a drawer (but NOT packed, just available), on the off chance, because I read on the HB board that packing at the last minute in an unexpected xfer situation felt incredibly stressful. But I don't want to actually PACK A BAG - that'd make me feel superstitious.<br><br>
miss_honeyb - thanks! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 

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Discussion Starter · #15 ·
Yeah, I know our midwife wouldn't transfer unless it were really necessary. And the whole point is <i>to be in the best place to give birth</i>, right? Which means at home with my midwife in most cases, and at the hospital with an OB if certain complications arise. So if I end up being in the hospital, at least I'll know that's the best place for me to be. Unlike starting out in the hospital, which I would feel anxious about.<br><br>
I think I will pack some stuff, just in case. I didn't have a bag packed for my first baby and it was a pain. But I don't think I'll write out a hospital plan. DH is VERY good at not letting anyone do anything to his family without explaining/getting consent, etc. He tends to challenge authority a lot, which can be aggrivating at times <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/irked.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="irked">: but in a hospital birth situation I love him for it. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/love.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="love"><br><br>
Any other homebirthers writing transfer plans or packing ahead of time?
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>steph117</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/9862294"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I haven't prepared any kind of transfer plan, either - largely because unfortunately, in NY state, the standard post-birth stuff - Vitamin K shot & eye goop - are required BY LAW (or they report you to the dept of child services or something insane like that). That's part of why we went with a home birth. My current transfer plan is: "Don't transfer." <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"></div>
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You would only be required to sign a waiver, it shouldn't be a big deal. It's not in Iowa atleast and I'd not read anything stating it's more difficult anywhere else, it would be ridiculous if it was! I love that your transfer plan is not to! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> That's pretty much where I am as well, I just read something yesterday that got me thinking about the whole thing.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>sarahn4639</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/9863172"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">You would only be required to sign a waiver, it shouldn't be a big deal. It's not in Iowa atleast and I'd not read anything stating it's more difficult anywhere else, it would be ridiculous if it was!</div>
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Hi Sarah,<br><br>
Here, check this out - an excerpt from a letter from the State of NY Dept of Health, reprinted on the <a href="http://ffitz.com/nyvic/law/vitamin-k.htm" target="_blank">New Yorkers for Vaccine Information & Choice website</a>. :<br>
"We have been alerted that a growing number of new parents are refusing to allow their newborns to receive a Vitamin K injection or eye prophylaxis. We are writing to remind you that both these interventions are required in New York State by both the sanitary code and the hospital code (Sections 12.2 and 405.21(e)(4)(v)(b), 10 NYCRR). Neither regulation exempts infants whose parents object to the practice. Since these treatments are mandated by state regulation, informed consent is unnecessary, and hospitals and individual providers cannot be sued for administering them. Conversely, a provider’s failure to administer these treatments could result in a citation. A parent’s refusal of these treatrnents can be reported to Child Protective Services."<br><br>
The Vaccination Liberation website states that the only option for refusal is basically to sue.<br><br>
I'm going to post to the NY tribe & see if anyone's tried refusing this in a hospital in NY recently - the last account I read was from 2001, & I think that CPS was about to be called, so the parents gave in. At the NY Birthing Center we toured, we asked about refusing eye gunk & vitamin K & they said you couldn't, it was state mandated & you can't say no. Also, that oral vitamin K was not considered acceptable.
 

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That is insane. If you don't have a tramatic birth and aren't circing then the Vit K is very, very rarely needed by a newborn. I feel there must be a reason it isn't produced in a newborn until the 8th day. The eye goo is basically only for sexually transmitted diseases. I know my STD status and it's negative so why put goo in my newborn's eye so it can't see very well and very likely burns!?! Okay, sorry, that rant wasn't directed at you, just the system! I don't undrestand how they can say they can do what ever they want to your baby and you can't object. That infuriates me! I hope you find better news than that. I hadn't heard that before so thank you for the info. I know it is mandated in every state, but typically a signed waiver is the only requirement to refuse.<br><br>
Well I guess you have it worked out anyway at your birth. The whole just don't transfer works well here! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/winky.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Wink">
 

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Last thread hijack, I promise! But one more thing about NY & the vit k/eye drops: I got one reply so far to my "anyone had any success refusing in NY" thread so far... get this! Uuuuugh!!<br><br>
"Well it's not that recent, 13 months ago, but my son was born at a hospital here in Buffalo and I tried to refuse both those. I had midwives and they and the nurses got very angry with me and said that if I refuse they will call CPS who will take my son long enough to administer both of these. (We dont believe in shots) I even talked to the pediatrician before my son was born about the Vit K and he said that he could get oral vit k instead and would talk to the midwives for me but it turned out he didnt know that it is not possible to come across oral vit k in this country. I didnt push it because it really looked like they were about to call CPS and I didnt want them taking my son and then having a record with them."<br><br>
So...um... YEAH! We're DOUBLY excited for the homebirth. YAY HOMEBIRTH!<br><br>
<end hijack>
 

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YEAH for you, second best day here since I saw two lines. IT was a huge obstacle for us here!
 
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